status check - tired (i lovingly blame the red sox
background ambiance - west wing dvd
it's about time boston showed up for this series ... yes, the odds are historically against the red sox, but come on. 1918 ... everything has been historically against the red sox for years. and it made for such a fun second half of the game to watch. well done, boys of autumn ...
now, however, i must turn to getting back into the normal swing of things. a pity, really, as i enjoyed the best reality-suspended weekend in washington. with the exception of a mad-cap dash to our boarded airplane yesterday morning (that we came just about as close as humanly possible to missing thanks to security at reagan), the three days in dc were more delightful than i could have imagined. everything just balanced out beautifully - plenty of time to roam the city, see the sights and wear out our legs, but balanced with low-key chill time that often left me so content i felt little inkling to do anything else. beyond the realization that we would have needed to buy tickets for another flight and still return to vermont in the end, i would have been perfectly fine with staying in dc longer.
it was a realization that surprised me, as i was nervous about making the trip - all the more so upon seeing the pristine landmarks glowing in their nighttime illumination as our plane descended thursday night. it was my return to washington after a less-than-powerful exit over a year before. as i told beth, "i don't mean to be, but i'm a passive-aggressive bridge burner. and now i'm returning to the scene of some major arson." it was new territory, returning to old stomping grounds.
but everything was just right. j, our dc hostess, is more of a treat to get to know the more i get to know her. i was able to see the people i'd wanted to see from my dc days and realized how much i've missed them. i was able to see some of the people i was terrified of seeing and realized how well i'm doing and that at least some of the bridge burning existed mostly in my mind. beth and i had the opportunity to see the city and just have fun being alternately savvy and silly. everyone seemed to have a great time during the "big" moments - exploring the kennedy center, sitting in the house gallery or gazing at the wwii memorial - and the little - sitting at a window counter sipping lattes and eating bites of pastries or laughing with chloe and beth as we enjoyed cocktails in adams morgan.
and i went full circle from my first trip junior year, when i traveled to the newseum and saw the wall of front page news. this time, rather than thinking how cool it would be to see my work on that wall, i had my picture taken while standing next to the front page of my paper - my byline there to see.
i felt the energy that had filled me during those actf visits and left me as i lived in the city. it confirmed for me that i do love washington - i adore it, really. but with that realization came another, that i made the right decision to leave it when i did. who knows how i would be now, had i stayed there. but i don't think i'd be as happy as i am now, had i remained. the timing wasn't right.
but i still love it. which felt grand to realize.
10.18.2004
WE LOVE YOU POPI!
status check - after five hours
background ambiance - and two minutes
to the bad red sox fan holding the sign bashing the team in the sixth inning ... HOW ABOUT THAT HOME RUN, HUH?
thank you, david ortiz, for that gorgeous shot to right field ... and allowing me to go to sleep.
background ambiance - and two minutes
to the bad red sox fan holding the sign bashing the team in the sixth inning ... HOW ABOUT THAT HOME RUN, HUH?
thank you, david ortiz, for that gorgeous shot to right field ... and allowing me to go to sleep.
10.17.2004
10.14.2004
save the gaiety!
status check - barely conscious
background ambiance - phones
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
i have no problems with mornings - that is, once i'm used to them. as resident night girl, i'm never at work this early.
as a result, i'm yawning as i fight the urge to nod off. and i'm starting to think perhaps a few shots of espresso would do me good.
but something did wake me up and grab my attention ... a phoenix story about the gaiety theatre in boston. or, i should say, a story about plans to demolish the gaiety. i've walked by the building countless times during my trips to boston and never even knew what i was walking by ... it makes me want to cry to read about what the city wants to do. honestly. anyone with an appreciation for theater should be horrified by this plan.
especially when you find out more about what the gaiety was in its heyday ... and what remains now. the group fighting for the theater's preservation has a website certainly worth visiting. please check it out.
ok, back to nodding off ... five hours of work left before three days of play.
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
background ambiance - phones
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
i have no problems with mornings - that is, once i'm used to them. as resident night girl, i'm never at work this early.
as a result, i'm yawning as i fight the urge to nod off. and i'm starting to think perhaps a few shots of espresso would do me good.
but something did wake me up and grab my attention ... a phoenix story about the gaiety theatre in boston. or, i should say, a story about plans to demolish the gaiety. i've walked by the building countless times during my trips to boston and never even knew what i was walking by ... it makes me want to cry to read about what the city wants to do. honestly. anyone with an appreciation for theater should be horrified by this plan.
especially when you find out more about what the gaiety was in its heyday ... and what remains now. the group fighting for the theater's preservation has a website certainly worth visiting. please check it out.
ok, back to nodding off ... five hours of work left before three days of play.
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
10.13.2004
state of the union
status check - amused
background ambiance - scanners
is it telling that i was just standing in front of two side-by-side televisions in the newsroom. on the left? red sox/yankees. on the right? kerry/bush.
all my attention, however, is focused on the left tv. osama bin laden could be dancing around behind the candidates and shaving his head and you still couldn't get me to not pay attention to the game.
background ambiance - scanners
is it telling that i was just standing in front of two side-by-side televisions in the newsroom. on the left? red sox/yankees. on the right? kerry/bush.
all my attention, however, is focused on the left tv. osama bin laden could be dancing around behind the candidates and shaving his head and you still couldn't get me to not pay attention to the game.
washingTONS to do
status check - frazzled
background ambiance - silence
it's amazing how some trips or activities stretch out before you in the distance and never seem to get any closer so you can embark on them.
then there are the trips when you realize, "oh jesus, i'm leaving tomorrow, but before i go, i've got to do this and this and this and oh yes, that too."
my impending long weekend in dc is definitely one of the latter. it hasn't fully dawned on me that i'll be on a plane tomorrow evening. i just got off the phone with a lunch-break beth and we both commented on how it doesn't feel like we're embarking on the much-discussed, much-delayed, finally-booked trip in less than 30 hours.
i have so much i need to accomplish before i go ... so much that it's all swimming in front of me and i'm starting to convince myself that i won't be able to get it all done. last night was a low-stress work evening - tonight will likely be frenzied, with sneaking glimpses at the game mid-interview phone calls.
but i just need to breathe, cross each completed task off my to-do list in a systematic manner and make sure to say "no" when it starts to look like too much. and enjoy getting excited about this trip that still seems so surreal.
ooh, and find my smartpass. i should still have a chunk of commuter money on that sucker.
background ambiance - silence
it's amazing how some trips or activities stretch out before you in the distance and never seem to get any closer so you can embark on them.
then there are the trips when you realize, "oh jesus, i'm leaving tomorrow, but before i go, i've got to do this and this and this and oh yes, that too."
my impending long weekend in dc is definitely one of the latter. it hasn't fully dawned on me that i'll be on a plane tomorrow evening. i just got off the phone with a lunch-break beth and we both commented on how it doesn't feel like we're embarking on the much-discussed, much-delayed, finally-booked trip in less than 30 hours.
i have so much i need to accomplish before i go ... so much that it's all swimming in front of me and i'm starting to convince myself that i won't be able to get it all done. last night was a low-stress work evening - tonight will likely be frenzied, with sneaking glimpses at the game mid-interview phone calls.
but i just need to breathe, cross each completed task off my to-do list in a systematic manner and make sure to say "no" when it starts to look like too much. and enjoy getting excited about this trip that still seems so surreal.
ooh, and find my smartpass. i should still have a chunk of commuter money on that sucker.
10.12.2004
nail-biter ...
status check - on the edge of my seat
background ambiance - red sox/yankees game
running commentary during the latter portion of the game. key: v=me, j=joey.
***be warned, a whole slew of expletives follow, mostly on my part. i get riled up during sox games***
v: last year, they lost to boston first game and wound up winning ...
YEAH KEVIN!!!!!
v: I LOVE HIM!!!!!!!!!
j: WE HAVE 2 AT HOME!
v: TWO RUNS!
j: YAH!
...
j: COME ON TROT... HIT A HOMER!
v: YAAAAAAAAAAYYYYY!
j: I'll take it!
v: COME ON JV!!!!!!!
v: favorite player of mine!
...
j: GGGGGGGOOOOOOO
v: AAAAHHHH!!!!
j: WOO HOO!!!
v: I LOVE YOU JV!!!!
...
v: only 3 runs away!
j: 4 :-)
v: i'm looking for the tie right now - not asking too much too soon!!!
v: baby steps
j: lol, I learned last season that ties only lead to extra inning heartaches and a hangover the next day!
v: LOL - i'm happier with an extra inning heartache than no need for a bottom of the 9th heartache!
j: touche
v: FOCUS ON THE FUCKING BATTER!!!!!
j: I'm not digging Embree's facial hair, but if he keeps the Yankees down to no runs this inning, I'll make myself love it
v: haha - rock it. much like millar's billy goat beard. it amuses/annoys me, but i love him too much to slam it too bad.
...
v: C'MON MANNY!
j: come on Manny! hit a homer
v: AAAAH!
v: C'MON POPI!
j: DAVID, HIT ANOTHER HOMER!!!
j: just like in the last game!
j: I want another one of those right now!
j: because I was in the car for it last time, but if he does it now, I will see it first hand
j: GGGGGGOOOOOO
v: aaaah!
j: WOO HOO!!! I'll take it!
j: YEAH!!!
v: I LOVE YOU POPI!!!!!!
j: gosh that was close to a home run though!
v: i love torre's face even more
v: sooooo close
j: I know
v: we lucked out big time
...
v: i hate you derek you fucking pussy bitch
j: lol
v: but i love you johnny!
v: i love you orlando!
j: I've never heard you talk like that about anyone!
v: jeter deserves it. the little sleezy bitchy girlie fucker
j: oh, I completely agree... I just have never heard you talk like that about anyone before
j: if I am going to hear it out of you though, Im glad it's about Jeter
v: haha - no one fucks with my red sox and gets away with it without a verbal lashing
v: a-rod's not much better. little diva wanker
v: ooh, look at me, i'm making $25,000 a swing ...
...
j: NICE V!
v: BASE HIT!
v: that's my boy
j: woo hoo!!! :-)
v: EEEEK!
v: C'MON MUELLER!
j: do it again!
j: let's beat them at their home field
v: this is killing me.
v: hit it, get on base, johnny'll redeem himself ...
v: i can't look
j: you? I have to get up for work in 6 hours
v: HAHAHA
j: DAMN
alternacoustic: MOTHER FUCKER!
j: well, at least I can go to bed now...
v: ok, they'll have game 2, 3, 4, then 5
v: it's so schilling can redeem himself.
j: but damn it I am bummed
v: we've got the rest of the series
j: I just want to state that I have been saying that we would take the series in 5 games! now I can mean it
j: we're winning the next 4!
background ambiance - red sox/yankees game
running commentary during the latter portion of the game. key: v=me, j=joey.
***be warned, a whole slew of expletives follow, mostly on my part. i get riled up during sox games***
v: last year, they lost to boston first game and wound up winning ...
YEAH KEVIN!!!!!
v: I LOVE HIM!!!!!!!!!
j: WE HAVE 2 AT HOME!
v: TWO RUNS!
j: YAH!
...
j: COME ON TROT... HIT A HOMER!
v: YAAAAAAAAAAYYYYY!
j: I'll take it!
v: COME ON JV!!!!!!!
v: favorite player of mine!
...
j: GGGGGGGOOOOOOO
v: AAAAHHHH!!!!
j: WOO HOO!!!
v: I LOVE YOU JV!!!!
...
v: only 3 runs away!
j: 4 :-)
v: i'm looking for the tie right now - not asking too much too soon!!!
v: baby steps
j: lol, I learned last season that ties only lead to extra inning heartaches and a hangover the next day!
v: LOL - i'm happier with an extra inning heartache than no need for a bottom of the 9th heartache!
j: touche
v: FOCUS ON THE FUCKING BATTER!!!!!
j: I'm not digging Embree's facial hair, but if he keeps the Yankees down to no runs this inning, I'll make myself love it
v: haha - rock it. much like millar's billy goat beard. it amuses/annoys me, but i love him too much to slam it too bad.
...
v: C'MON MANNY!
j: come on Manny! hit a homer
v: AAAAH!
v: C'MON POPI!
j: DAVID, HIT ANOTHER HOMER!!!
j: just like in the last game!
j: I want another one of those right now!
j: because I was in the car for it last time, but if he does it now, I will see it first hand
j: GGGGGGOOOOOO
v: aaaah!
j: WOO HOO!!! I'll take it!
j: YEAH!!!
v: I LOVE YOU POPI!!!!!!
j: gosh that was close to a home run though!
v: i love torre's face even more
v: sooooo close
j: I know
v: we lucked out big time
...
v: i hate you derek you fucking pussy bitch
j: lol
v: but i love you johnny!
v: i love you orlando!
j: I've never heard you talk like that about anyone!
v: jeter deserves it. the little sleezy bitchy girlie fucker
j: oh, I completely agree... I just have never heard you talk like that about anyone before
j: if I am going to hear it out of you though, Im glad it's about Jeter
v: haha - no one fucks with my red sox and gets away with it without a verbal lashing
v: a-rod's not much better. little diva wanker
v: ooh, look at me, i'm making $25,000 a swing ...
...
j: NICE V!
v: BASE HIT!
v: that's my boy
j: woo hoo!!! :-)
v: EEEEK!
v: C'MON MUELLER!
j: do it again!
j: let's beat them at their home field
v: this is killing me.
v: hit it, get on base, johnny'll redeem himself ...
v: i can't look
j: you? I have to get up for work in 6 hours
v: HAHAHA
j: DAMN
alternacoustic: MOTHER FUCKER!
j: well, at least I can go to bed now...
v: ok, they'll have game 2, 3, 4, then 5
v: it's so schilling can redeem himself.
j: but damn it I am bummed
v: we've got the rest of the series
j: I just want to state that I have been saying that we would take the series in 5 games! now I can mean it
j: we're winning the next 4!
xoxo
status check - amused
background ambiance - scanner
i don't know what i find funnier - that rilo kiley is mentioned on "gilmore girls" or that rilo kiley is mentioned on "gilmore girls" and i have a phone call and IM alerting me to this fact three minutes later.
background ambiance - scanner
i don't know what i find funnier - that rilo kiley is mentioned on "gilmore girls" or that rilo kiley is mentioned on "gilmore girls" and i have a phone call and IM alerting me to this fact three minutes later.
spirited
status check - lovely
background ambiance - same old
it's a self-indulgent tuesday.
i'm feeling relaxed and confident today, dressed for both style and comfort as i attack the first tasks in my apparently low-stress day. i woke up late (well, fine, this is typical as of late) and spent my conscious pre-work hours enjoying season one of "the west wing"* and doing a little shopping/wandering on church street during a gorgeous autumn early afternoon. i've treated myself to a few superfluous purchases based on nothing other than the fact that i wanted them. i've capped it all off with a speeder and earl's grasshopper (white chocolate, espresso and mint).
among the previously mentioned purchases? a rose-colored velvet blazer and a new red sox hat to replace the one i was given one late-childhood christmas. it doesn't fit, so i haven't worn it in years - i realized today that it was to remedy that. i was amused to discover a small horde of people in the sporting goods store, all clamoring for a boston cap and heckling the one brave soul interested in buying new yankees headgear.
i picked out my selection and scoffed as the salesman asked if i wanted a bag. hell no, i only needed a garbage recepticle in which to place the tags and stickers. i planned on walking out with the purchase snugly placed on my head, thank you. and, upon doing so, i immediately walked into a number of walk-bys greetings and smiles from my boston bretheren. it was a huge surprise to me, as i'd just walked the same street minutes before and seen only a smattering of red sox gear. on my post-purchase travels, i've graciously received compliments on the hat and remarks of "can't wait for tonight!" after buying my hot caffeinated bevarage, i had the door to the coffeeshop held open for me by a charming fellow wearing a boston hat of his own. he had held the door for the older woman leaving before me and remained at the doorman perch for longer than most would consider necessary, letting me pass through the doorway unencumbered. he smiled as i said thank you, replying that he wouldn't hold the door for a yankees fan.
i'm preparing to watch tonight's game from the office, cheering with my mini wally the green monster beanbag purchased for me at the lone sox game i was able to attend this season. i've been reading interviews, analysies and articles about the game and the series matchup, and i'm determined to get today's work done early so i can spend much of the evening roaming between my desk and the televisions.
the only thing that would make it better would be going to a bar to watch the game ... a funny realization to make considering i'm not generally one to watch sporting events in such an environment. but i'm hoping to come up with a way to do so at some point this series.
ah, how i adore october game days in new england ...
background ambiance - same old
it's a self-indulgent tuesday.
i'm feeling relaxed and confident today, dressed for both style and comfort as i attack the first tasks in my apparently low-stress day. i woke up late (well, fine, this is typical as of late) and spent my conscious pre-work hours enjoying season one of "the west wing"* and doing a little shopping/wandering on church street during a gorgeous autumn early afternoon. i've treated myself to a few superfluous purchases based on nothing other than the fact that i wanted them. i've capped it all off with a speeder and earl's grasshopper (white chocolate, espresso and mint).
among the previously mentioned purchases? a rose-colored velvet blazer and a new red sox hat to replace the one i was given one late-childhood christmas. it doesn't fit, so i haven't worn it in years - i realized today that it was to remedy that. i was amused to discover a small horde of people in the sporting goods store, all clamoring for a boston cap and heckling the one brave soul interested in buying new yankees headgear.
i picked out my selection and scoffed as the salesman asked if i wanted a bag. hell no, i only needed a garbage recepticle in which to place the tags and stickers. i planned on walking out with the purchase snugly placed on my head, thank you. and, upon doing so, i immediately walked into a number of walk-bys greetings and smiles from my boston bretheren. it was a huge surprise to me, as i'd just walked the same street minutes before and seen only a smattering of red sox gear. on my post-purchase travels, i've graciously received compliments on the hat and remarks of "can't wait for tonight!" after buying my hot caffeinated bevarage, i had the door to the coffeeshop held open for me by a charming fellow wearing a boston hat of his own. he had held the door for the older woman leaving before me and remained at the doorman perch for longer than most would consider necessary, letting me pass through the doorway unencumbered. he smiled as i said thank you, replying that he wouldn't hold the door for a yankees fan.
i'm preparing to watch tonight's game from the office, cheering with my mini wally the green monster beanbag purchased for me at the lone sox game i was able to attend this season. i've been reading interviews, analysies and articles about the game and the series matchup, and i'm determined to get today's work done early so i can spend much of the evening roaming between my desk and the televisions.
the only thing that would make it better would be going to a bar to watch the game ... a funny realization to make considering i'm not generally one to watch sporting events in such an environment. but i'm hoping to come up with a way to do so at some point this series.
ah, how i adore october game days in new england ...
10.11.2004
*
status check - awake
background ambiance - washing machine
actually, he is.
(note: there's a link! interactivity! click on the title!)
background ambiance - washing machine
actually, he is.
(note: there's a link! interactivity! click on the title!)
10.10.2004
wheeling along
status check - contemplative
background ambiance - "the west wing" - season one dvd
i bought a new piece of luggage today. the professional-looking yet incredibly versatile rolling carry-on. small enough to forgo the fears of checking luggage that will be resultingly lost in transit, large enough to hold a long weekend's worth of clothing, books and other necessities.
the power in this single piece of travel gear is deceptively intoxicating. for the past year and a half, my new england travel patterns have required little more than my bright orange ll bean backpack, left over from my college days. i haven't needed anything else - just throw the backpack in the backseat of the car and hit the road.
sure, such a backpack contains the potential for enjoyment, but a rolling carry-on represents travel beyond a car. it hints at airports, beverage carts and tray tables locked in their full and upright positions. it is just asking for staircases, concrete cracks and cobblestones.
i utilized a different carry-on on a regular basis during my various times in dc. during actf festivals, i cursed the luggage as it skipped and jumped on the sidewalk while i searched for my hotel. i was tempted to kick it junior year, but i'd already nearly broken my toe the night before the trip, so such a vicious attack would have hurt me far more than the witless luggage.
a couple of years later, i cursed the same piece of luggage as it refused to cooperate with the cobblestones of union station. time and time again, i tried to get it to understand - cobblestones meant trip home. it didn't get it.
my preparation of this vacation in washington leaves me feeling far more opimistic. i finally have a new carry-on. the idiotic earlier version has been thrown away and i couldn't be happier to see it go. this carry-on? strong and obedient, complete with a push lock handle and an zipper-concealed expansion feature that will cater to my slightly larger-than-expected packing needs. i've already tested this piece with the gravel in my driveway - it lived up to the lofty expectations i have placed on it. it will serve me well in dc and for the trips to come in the (hopefully) near future.
i'm sitting here, wondering what i'll pack in it, what i'll bring with me for my return to the mid-atlantic. how it will help me present myself on this first trip back - and what i'll pack in it for the return trip less than a week from now.
this new piece of cloth, plastic and metal holds infinite possibilities for its new, excited owner.
background ambiance - "the west wing" - season one dvd
i bought a new piece of luggage today. the professional-looking yet incredibly versatile rolling carry-on. small enough to forgo the fears of checking luggage that will be resultingly lost in transit, large enough to hold a long weekend's worth of clothing, books and other necessities.
the power in this single piece of travel gear is deceptively intoxicating. for the past year and a half, my new england travel patterns have required little more than my bright orange ll bean backpack, left over from my college days. i haven't needed anything else - just throw the backpack in the backseat of the car and hit the road.
sure, such a backpack contains the potential for enjoyment, but a rolling carry-on represents travel beyond a car. it hints at airports, beverage carts and tray tables locked in their full and upright positions. it is just asking for staircases, concrete cracks and cobblestones.
i utilized a different carry-on on a regular basis during my various times in dc. during actf festivals, i cursed the luggage as it skipped and jumped on the sidewalk while i searched for my hotel. i was tempted to kick it junior year, but i'd already nearly broken my toe the night before the trip, so such a vicious attack would have hurt me far more than the witless luggage.
a couple of years later, i cursed the same piece of luggage as it refused to cooperate with the cobblestones of union station. time and time again, i tried to get it to understand - cobblestones meant trip home. it didn't get it.
my preparation of this vacation in washington leaves me feeling far more opimistic. i finally have a new carry-on. the idiotic earlier version has been thrown away and i couldn't be happier to see it go. this carry-on? strong and obedient, complete with a push lock handle and an zipper-concealed expansion feature that will cater to my slightly larger-than-expected packing needs. i've already tested this piece with the gravel in my driveway - it lived up to the lofty expectations i have placed on it. it will serve me well in dc and for the trips to come in the (hopefully) near future.
i'm sitting here, wondering what i'll pack in it, what i'll bring with me for my return to the mid-atlantic. how it will help me present myself on this first trip back - and what i'll pack in it for the return trip less than a week from now.
this new piece of cloth, plastic and metal holds infinite possibilities for its new, excited owner.
10.09.2004
minor chords, major lifts
status check - content
background ambiance - tv pundits analyzing the debate
extreme lows were followed by mercifully extreme highs this evening. thanks to the red sox for making me jump up and down in the middle of the newsroom this evening ... i made myself (and everyone left in the office by that time) laugh at my giddiness. the one time i'll be happy to see something california return to the west ...
the red sox revelry was followed up by teitur at uvm ... talk about feeling like i stepped into a time warp. free show at a college lounge area, everyone sprawled out on couches and chairs while the guitar guy (this time armed with two bandmates for some songs) was his own goofy self onstage ... i was having crazy flashbacks to the howie days.
teitur was great - songs with pianos make me happy. songs with a harmonium make me even happier. hearing "i was just thinking" and "poetry & aeroplanes" brought me joy, while "great balls of fire" cracked me up and impressed me at the same time. he's on tour, fancy tour bus and all. see him when the bus roles into your town.
as for the lows ... well, let's just say that i'm working my ass off. and the one thing i hate more than being ignored is being lied to. but i've been following through with my vow to stick up for myself, so i'm not going to take no for an answer when it comes to something that just makes sense.
i am arts girl - hear me roar.
background ambiance - tv pundits analyzing the debate
extreme lows were followed by mercifully extreme highs this evening. thanks to the red sox for making me jump up and down in the middle of the newsroom this evening ... i made myself (and everyone left in the office by that time) laugh at my giddiness. the one time i'll be happy to see something california return to the west ...
the red sox revelry was followed up by teitur at uvm ... talk about feeling like i stepped into a time warp. free show at a college lounge area, everyone sprawled out on couches and chairs while the guitar guy (this time armed with two bandmates for some songs) was his own goofy self onstage ... i was having crazy flashbacks to the howie days.
teitur was great - songs with pianos make me happy. songs with a harmonium make me even happier. hearing "i was just thinking" and "poetry & aeroplanes" brought me joy, while "great balls of fire" cracked me up and impressed me at the same time. he's on tour, fancy tour bus and all. see him when the bus roles into your town.
as for the lows ... well, let's just say that i'm working my ass off. and the one thing i hate more than being ignored is being lied to. but i've been following through with my vow to stick up for myself, so i'm not going to take no for an answer when it comes to something that just makes sense.
i am arts girl - hear me roar.
10.07.2004
this could not be any more perfect
status check - impressed
background ambiance - rilo kiley - "the frug"
it's time to put together the clips, get a letter of recommendation and make myself look brilliant.
yes, folks - i am applying for a fellowship. an absolutely heavenly one, at that. theater. 11 days. california.
wish me luck.
background ambiance - rilo kiley - "the frug"
it's time to put together the clips, get a letter of recommendation and make myself look brilliant.
yes, folks - i am applying for a fellowship. an absolutely heavenly one, at that. theater. 11 days. california.
wish me luck.
10.06.2004
fatigued
status check - slightly tired
background ambiance - back to usual
i'm just tired of having to grin and bear.
i shouldn't have to. i'm not going to.
background ambiance - back to usual
i'm just tired of having to grin and bear.
i shouldn't have to. i'm not going to.
p.s.
status check - amused
background ambiance - still silent
averi - 11.6 at the pickel barrel on killington.
i think we should go and rock out. why? look at the date. since i can't do anything the wednesday before due to work, i say we have a blast at an averi vermont show. bwahahaha.
yes, i know i just went off on a tangent the other day about the band, but let's face it - i can wish whatever i want and be sad about aspects of it, but it's not going to change things in any way. so i can just stop listening or i can deal and be slightly cynical. and we all know what option i'm selecting.
anyway, from last year's archives ...
hey, my birthday is in a little over a week - if anyone wants to book averi to help celebrate my 23rd, go nuts!
i've wanted to celebrate my birthday with an averi show for two years now, i'm not going to pass it up when the opportunity presents itself.
however hypocritical it may make me.
background ambiance - still silent
averi - 11.6 at the pickel barrel on killington.
i think we should go and rock out. why? look at the date. since i can't do anything the wednesday before due to work, i say we have a blast at an averi vermont show. bwahahaha.
yes, i know i just went off on a tangent the other day about the band, but let's face it - i can wish whatever i want and be sad about aspects of it, but it's not going to change things in any way. so i can just stop listening or i can deal and be slightly cynical. and we all know what option i'm selecting.
anyway, from last year's archives ...
hey, my birthday is in a little over a week - if anyone wants to book averi to help celebrate my 23rd, go nuts!
i've wanted to celebrate my birthday with an averi show for two years now, i'm not going to pass it up when the opportunity presents itself.
however hypocritical it may make me.
i'm ready to go ...
status check - content
background ambiance - silence
rilo kiley - great note on which to end the minibreak. as to be expected, about half the set was comprised of tracks off "more adventurous," but that was fine by me - hearing some of those tracks live actually made me like them more, so that's a bonus. of the previous two albums, the only song i'd really hoped to hear live and didn't was "with arms outstretched" - not half bad to wind up with one wish unfulfilled.
i thought "a better son/daughter" would be the highlight of my night, but it turned out to be the surprise (to me) inclusion of "pictures of success," the song that made me an avid listener. i happily sang along and thought to february when jenny got to "and they say california is a recipe for a black hole, well i say i've got my best shoes on, i'm ready to go ..."
it was funny - blake had this gorgeous large guitar, almost a sea-foam green, a little country flair going on with it. i've seen a guitar that looks just like it before - although blake seemed slightly more size-appropriate (scary, considering the fact that blake's hardly a big guy). nice to see a guitar like that's actually getting some play time ...
the size of the crowd amazed me ... so many people there, singing along with every word. i can't think of anyone among my normal group of friends who regularly listens to rilo kiley, let alone shares my enthusiasm for the band. felt great to be among people who got as much out of the music (if not more at times) as i did ...
now exhausted and with tired legs (i haven't walked this much since dc - for the most part, i liked it), i drift to sleep. rest up for the trip back and work in the afternoon ...
background ambiance - silence
rilo kiley - great note on which to end the minibreak. as to be expected, about half the set was comprised of tracks off "more adventurous," but that was fine by me - hearing some of those tracks live actually made me like them more, so that's a bonus. of the previous two albums, the only song i'd really hoped to hear live and didn't was "with arms outstretched" - not half bad to wind up with one wish unfulfilled.
i thought "a better son/daughter" would be the highlight of my night, but it turned out to be the surprise (to me) inclusion of "pictures of success," the song that made me an avid listener. i happily sang along and thought to february when jenny got to "and they say california is a recipe for a black hole, well i say i've got my best shoes on, i'm ready to go ..."
it was funny - blake had this gorgeous large guitar, almost a sea-foam green, a little country flair going on with it. i've seen a guitar that looks just like it before - although blake seemed slightly more size-appropriate (scary, considering the fact that blake's hardly a big guy). nice to see a guitar like that's actually getting some play time ...
the size of the crowd amazed me ... so many people there, singing along with every word. i can't think of anyone among my normal group of friends who regularly listens to rilo kiley, let alone shares my enthusiasm for the band. felt great to be among people who got as much out of the music (if not more at times) as i did ...
now exhausted and with tired legs (i haven't walked this much since dc - for the most part, i liked it), i drift to sleep. rest up for the trip back and work in the afternoon ...
10.05.2004
peppy
status check - awake
background ambiance - silence
yeah, it was a little dorky. but i don't care. i had a wicked fun time at the red sox pep rally last night at fenway. wound up five rows from the red sox dugout/NESN stage and was cheering and waving a towel like it was my job.
what can i say? when you're born and bred a red sox fan and you have the chance to let your team know you're rooting for them AND spend time in fenway park, you do it - no questions asked.
about halfway through the rally (which was broadcast on NESN), i received a voicemail. my father, saying "hey, you put your jacket on!" they had seen me several times throughout the show.
i found it funny. much as i did when dropkick murphys busted into a cover of "dirty water." i started cracking up ...
in other news. rilo kiley tonight. little more needs be said.
background ambiance - silence
yeah, it was a little dorky. but i don't care. i had a wicked fun time at the red sox pep rally last night at fenway. wound up five rows from the red sox dugout/NESN stage and was cheering and waving a towel like it was my job.
what can i say? when you're born and bred a red sox fan and you have the chance to let your team know you're rooting for them AND spend time in fenway park, you do it - no questions asked.
about halfway through the rally (which was broadcast on NESN), i received a voicemail. my father, saying "hey, you put your jacket on!" they had seen me several times throughout the show.
i found it funny. much as i did when dropkick murphys busted into a cover of "dirty water." i started cracking up ...
in other news. rilo kiley tonight. little more needs be said.
10.04.2004
alas, seth cohen was MIA
status check - interesting
background ambiance - inflatable mattress, well, inflating ...
god forbid i leave you without something to read during your workdays ... reliable - that's the kind of service you've come to expect - and i've come to provide - with victoria publishing. we aim to please.
so. sooooo, even. interesting experiences today all around. in this episode, our heroine embarks on a search with her punk brother and a touring guitarist, basks in the sunshine of boston common, misses bonding with a "rock star" over our mutual love of caffeinated goodness by five minutes and finally realizes the shift in her attitude about a long-loved band. to top it all off, she winds up sharing probably too much information about it all with her readership.
yep. i was busy. i suppose it would be smartest to start at the beginning of the list and work my way through. i have a feeling this will be a long one. prepared? feel free to grab a drink or something before you start. i'll be here when you get back.
ok, we're all set now? let's go.
after meeting up with my brother (always a high point to any boston trip) and enjoying vegetarian goodness (delightedly per normal), i thought i'd be smart and find the roxy ahead of time, as i had never been there before. figured having the navigationally savvy tom with me would be a bonus. except for the fact that the roxy is one of the most discreetly labeled places i've encountered. which means we walked right by it without realizing.
pondering our next course of action (and cursing tremont for turning sharply at a corner - the corner of tremont and tremont? honestly now ...), we encounter a guy wearing a very gavin degraw-esque newsboy-like cap, looking confused. he asks if we know where the roxy is ... and he joins our search party.
through chatting, i learn that the cap is there for good reason. he's gavin degraw's guitarist and he's trying to get to the roxy for soundcheck. i laugh inside, temporarily banish my cartman voice and instead ask how the touring's been going and whatnot. very nice guy. ultimately, we turn in a complete block and get back to just before where we all met up - lo and behold, the roxy's right there. whoops. he asks if we're coming in, i decline, since i'm sure my brother wouldn't have been keen on joining a pop-rock fest. instead i get to introduce tom to honeydew iced coffee and we chat while lying on the grass in the common during a glorious early autumn day. works for me.
so after leaving the brother type and enjoying dinner, i head to the roxy. since i don't want to be there too early and just stand around waiting for the doors to open, i decide to get coffee. i walk back up tremont, right into an unrecognized or unacknowledged walk-by from the averi guys, get my starbucks and return to the line of gavin degraw fans that stretches down two full blocks. girls in front of me freak mere minutes later when their friends arrive and announce that they just met gavin at starbucks, where he was "so normal, just getting a cup of coffee. he's hotter in person." i snicker (see beth? i can snicker, too).
ultimately i get into the venue, get the first of a couple of $7.50 drinks (which made me think how right dennis was that night at metronome) and enjoy the show. order: tristan, averi, walter, gavin. for sake of not going back and forth between the performance list, i'm mixing up the order of my descriptions. c'est la vie - just figured i'd provide warning.
tristan - great. very short set (five songs, i believe? "evaporated," "guest check," "toxic," "love love love," "better"), but she was on and i'm definitely enoying her performance. people next to me are rude during the set, but that is their problem. i'm just singing along.
walter - when a tall professional basketball player starts busting out a cover of "she will be loved," he's got my attention. the best part is that he would make maroon 5 proud. i'm quite impressed with his set, very impressed with his voice.
(did you notice that, after the first paragraph of this story, i switched from past to present tense? that, dear reader, is an attempt to make sure you're right there with me in the reading process. see? i want us to be on the same page here.)
gavin - i don't quite know what to do with myself. it's my third time seeing him perform, although i did leave about three songs in back in june. i'm not expecting much of anything - other than an early departure from the roxy. get to beat everyone else in the coatcheck line.
instead? i find that a personality has sprung up suddenly. he's mixing things up, he's adding riffs - it's no longer just listening to the "chariot" album really loud with a bunch of people around. i'm actually enjoying myself. i'm even singing along.
but i'm also feeling very out of place. because, for whatever reason, attending a gavin degraw concert is, i realize, much like winning a walk-on part on a wb drama. it's just this complete package of pretty gloss. the lights are lovely - heavy on blues and purples - and gavin somehow seems to be in very close proximity to you, even from a spot quite far back. the band tends to move right from one song to the next, and the audience is just singing along to every single word. waving arms back and forth, dancing along ... and the audience is composed of the lovely beautiful young people. everyone who wanted to be on "the o.c." or "one tree hill" is at this show and they're all rock-casual chic. abercrombie guys galore. one girl? wide-necked black three-quarter length sleeve shirt. red straps underneath, a sash to match around her waist. wearing capri cargos with camoflauge print, stillettos AND a beret. ???
i don't want to be an o.c. girl. although if adam brody happened to be here, i'd be cool with further ruining seth cohen's relationship with summer and later discussing rilo kiley or bright eyes. but he's not, so i'm just feeling awfully old. i focus on singing, doing my thing and saying hi to the people i run into - including a hi-bye conversation with chad that i begin and quickly end (the end part comes from tonight's realization. see below).
which leads me to averi's set. they perform very well. they're all locked into the same mentality and are definitely into the extended jam, which is a good call. stu and michael wail away and are fantastic (but then again, they always are). chris keeps the bass anchors steady, while matt's typical matt - just damn good.
chad's appears to have decided to gradually move away from the rhythm guitarist/singer role to the frontman role. in previous sets i've seen lately, he's gone guitarless for a couple of songs. tonight it's about a third of the set. i'm still not into it - less walking around stage, more playing, please. and do NOT do the "reach out and touch the hands of adoring fans trying to grasp at you in any manner possible." i'm laughing hysterically when that occurs.
his singing is pretty on tonight - the middle earth cold voice is long gone. my jaw drops when he starts teasing silk's "freak me" during the final song ... then i'm signing along laughingly. there's something about seeing chad perrone sing "i wanna lick you up and down til you say stop" that defies explanation. funny as hell and he knows it.
"despondent" is not in the setlist, but "flutter" is back - and he remembers the lyrics this time. bonus. "for better or worse" is sounding better each time i hear it ... something that leaves me feeling perplexed. i love the song, but i want to hate it sheerly on the basis of principle. or, rather, sheerly on the basis that i wish the change that prompted the song never took place.
whenever i've heard that song lately, it prompts me to reflect for a moment, but it really gets me for some reason tonight.
***insight into my mixed-up mind about to commence.***
while pleased to see averi doing well, i've just been really angry/frustrated/disillusioned/etc. with what i've seen over the past ten months or so. and most of it has been prompted by chad. the other guys have always been nice (for the most part) when i had the opportunity to say hi to them, but chad was the one band member i spoke without outside of the whole band thing. he was nice, funny, thoughtful - and it seemed like he wanted to get to know you when he spoke with you. he'd write emails to you to say thank you for coming to a show because it meant a lot to him to see you there.
and to top it all off, you realized that averi was the first band you were really following as they grew. you knew they'd be able to avoid the traps that other bands encounter on the way up.
he's changed - and the band's changed with him. the rest of the guys (again, for the most part) are still very nice, but chad's trying to do this whole frontman thing, rather than being a member of averi. and it seems like they're letting him. he's getting full of himself and now you realize that to him, you're just another person who will go to the shows and sing along, but also one more person to say hi and give a one-armed hug to before moving on to the next person.
now don't go saying it - i know. the more fans you have, the more people who come to a show hoping for an opportunity to say hello. the more photo requests (amusingly, with all the shows i've attended, i've never had a posed photo taken with anyone in the band), the more autograph requests, the more demand. i know this and acquiesce that some compassion needs be present from potential cynics. but there's a difference.
there's no denying the autobiographical aspect of "for better or worse" - "the person i was could go by another name, he's a stranger to me now." for a long time, the fact that those lyrics were accurate just pissed me off. i wanted him to go back - to be the nice guy i remembered and to sing for the near-overwhelmingly kind band of five unassuming guys i first heard years ago (although they could maintain the current musical growth and development).
tonight, however, i realized that i'm not angry about it anymore, just sad about the whole damn thing.
i'd love to be able to just go to an averi show, rock out and sing along, then say, "hey, cool" and not have some of the memories i associate with each song. a large piece of me wishes i'd found another band to play the benefit concert two and a half years ago, that i'd hadn't learned anything more about chad than what i would see onstage. i could have seen the band in boston at some point anyway, right? i wouldn't have had to watch it all shift.
"and i can't change things, i can't change anything, but if i could, maybe i would and maybe that's wrong."
background ambiance - inflatable mattress, well, inflating ...
god forbid i leave you without something to read during your workdays ... reliable - that's the kind of service you've come to expect - and i've come to provide - with victoria publishing. we aim to please.
so. sooooo, even. interesting experiences today all around. in this episode, our heroine embarks on a search with her punk brother and a touring guitarist, basks in the sunshine of boston common, misses bonding with a "rock star" over our mutual love of caffeinated goodness by five minutes and finally realizes the shift in her attitude about a long-loved band. to top it all off, she winds up sharing probably too much information about it all with her readership.
yep. i was busy. i suppose it would be smartest to start at the beginning of the list and work my way through. i have a feeling this will be a long one. prepared? feel free to grab a drink or something before you start. i'll be here when you get back.
ok, we're all set now? let's go.
after meeting up with my brother (always a high point to any boston trip) and enjoying vegetarian goodness (delightedly per normal), i thought i'd be smart and find the roxy ahead of time, as i had never been there before. figured having the navigationally savvy tom with me would be a bonus. except for the fact that the roxy is one of the most discreetly labeled places i've encountered. which means we walked right by it without realizing.
pondering our next course of action (and cursing tremont for turning sharply at a corner - the corner of tremont and tremont? honestly now ...), we encounter a guy wearing a very gavin degraw-esque newsboy-like cap, looking confused. he asks if we know where the roxy is ... and he joins our search party.
through chatting, i learn that the cap is there for good reason. he's gavin degraw's guitarist and he's trying to get to the roxy for soundcheck. i laugh inside, temporarily banish my cartman voice and instead ask how the touring's been going and whatnot. very nice guy. ultimately, we turn in a complete block and get back to just before where we all met up - lo and behold, the roxy's right there. whoops. he asks if we're coming in, i decline, since i'm sure my brother wouldn't have been keen on joining a pop-rock fest. instead i get to introduce tom to honeydew iced coffee and we chat while lying on the grass in the common during a glorious early autumn day. works for me.
so after leaving the brother type and enjoying dinner, i head to the roxy. since i don't want to be there too early and just stand around waiting for the doors to open, i decide to get coffee. i walk back up tremont, right into an unrecognized or unacknowledged walk-by from the averi guys, get my starbucks and return to the line of gavin degraw fans that stretches down two full blocks. girls in front of me freak mere minutes later when their friends arrive and announce that they just met gavin at starbucks, where he was "so normal, just getting a cup of coffee. he's hotter in person." i snicker (see beth? i can snicker, too).
ultimately i get into the venue, get the first of a couple of $7.50 drinks (which made me think how right dennis was that night at metronome) and enjoy the show. order: tristan, averi, walter, gavin. for sake of not going back and forth between the performance list, i'm mixing up the order of my descriptions. c'est la vie - just figured i'd provide warning.
tristan - great. very short set (five songs, i believe? "evaporated," "guest check," "toxic," "love love love," "better"), but she was on and i'm definitely enoying her performance. people next to me are rude during the set, but that is their problem. i'm just singing along.
walter - when a tall professional basketball player starts busting out a cover of "she will be loved," he's got my attention. the best part is that he would make maroon 5 proud. i'm quite impressed with his set, very impressed with his voice.
(did you notice that, after the first paragraph of this story, i switched from past to present tense? that, dear reader, is an attempt to make sure you're right there with me in the reading process. see? i want us to be on the same page here.)
gavin - i don't quite know what to do with myself. it's my third time seeing him perform, although i did leave about three songs in back in june. i'm not expecting much of anything - other than an early departure from the roxy. get to beat everyone else in the coatcheck line.
instead? i find that a personality has sprung up suddenly. he's mixing things up, he's adding riffs - it's no longer just listening to the "chariot" album really loud with a bunch of people around. i'm actually enjoying myself. i'm even singing along.
but i'm also feeling very out of place. because, for whatever reason, attending a gavin degraw concert is, i realize, much like winning a walk-on part on a wb drama. it's just this complete package of pretty gloss. the lights are lovely - heavy on blues and purples - and gavin somehow seems to be in very close proximity to you, even from a spot quite far back. the band tends to move right from one song to the next, and the audience is just singing along to every single word. waving arms back and forth, dancing along ... and the audience is composed of the lovely beautiful young people. everyone who wanted to be on "the o.c." or "one tree hill" is at this show and they're all rock-casual chic. abercrombie guys galore. one girl? wide-necked black three-quarter length sleeve shirt. red straps underneath, a sash to match around her waist. wearing capri cargos with camoflauge print, stillettos AND a beret. ???
i don't want to be an o.c. girl. although if adam brody happened to be here, i'd be cool with further ruining seth cohen's relationship with summer and later discussing rilo kiley or bright eyes. but he's not, so i'm just feeling awfully old. i focus on singing, doing my thing and saying hi to the people i run into - including a hi-bye conversation with chad that i begin and quickly end (the end part comes from tonight's realization. see below).
which leads me to averi's set. they perform very well. they're all locked into the same mentality and are definitely into the extended jam, which is a good call. stu and michael wail away and are fantastic (but then again, they always are). chris keeps the bass anchors steady, while matt's typical matt - just damn good.
chad's appears to have decided to gradually move away from the rhythm guitarist/singer role to the frontman role. in previous sets i've seen lately, he's gone guitarless for a couple of songs. tonight it's about a third of the set. i'm still not into it - less walking around stage, more playing, please. and do NOT do the "reach out and touch the hands of adoring fans trying to grasp at you in any manner possible." i'm laughing hysterically when that occurs.
his singing is pretty on tonight - the middle earth cold voice is long gone. my jaw drops when he starts teasing silk's "freak me" during the final song ... then i'm signing along laughingly. there's something about seeing chad perrone sing "i wanna lick you up and down til you say stop" that defies explanation. funny as hell and he knows it.
"despondent" is not in the setlist, but "flutter" is back - and he remembers the lyrics this time. bonus. "for better or worse" is sounding better each time i hear it ... something that leaves me feeling perplexed. i love the song, but i want to hate it sheerly on the basis of principle. or, rather, sheerly on the basis that i wish the change that prompted the song never took place.
whenever i've heard that song lately, it prompts me to reflect for a moment, but it really gets me for some reason tonight.
***insight into my mixed-up mind about to commence.***
while pleased to see averi doing well, i've just been really angry/frustrated/disillusioned/etc. with what i've seen over the past ten months or so. and most of it has been prompted by chad. the other guys have always been nice (for the most part) when i had the opportunity to say hi to them, but chad was the one band member i spoke without outside of the whole band thing. he was nice, funny, thoughtful - and it seemed like he wanted to get to know you when he spoke with you. he'd write emails to you to say thank you for coming to a show because it meant a lot to him to see you there.
and to top it all off, you realized that averi was the first band you were really following as they grew. you knew they'd be able to avoid the traps that other bands encounter on the way up.
he's changed - and the band's changed with him. the rest of the guys (again, for the most part) are still very nice, but chad's trying to do this whole frontman thing, rather than being a member of averi. and it seems like they're letting him. he's getting full of himself and now you realize that to him, you're just another person who will go to the shows and sing along, but also one more person to say hi and give a one-armed hug to before moving on to the next person.
now don't go saying it - i know. the more fans you have, the more people who come to a show hoping for an opportunity to say hello. the more photo requests (amusingly, with all the shows i've attended, i've never had a posed photo taken with anyone in the band), the more autograph requests, the more demand. i know this and acquiesce that some compassion needs be present from potential cynics. but there's a difference.
there's no denying the autobiographical aspect of "for better or worse" - "the person i was could go by another name, he's a stranger to me now." for a long time, the fact that those lyrics were accurate just pissed me off. i wanted him to go back - to be the nice guy i remembered and to sing for the near-overwhelmingly kind band of five unassuming guys i first heard years ago (although they could maintain the current musical growth and development).
tonight, however, i realized that i'm not angry about it anymore, just sad about the whole damn thing.
i'd love to be able to just go to an averi show, rock out and sing along, then say, "hey, cool" and not have some of the memories i associate with each song. a large piece of me wishes i'd found another band to play the benefit concert two and a half years ago, that i'd hadn't learned anything more about chad than what i would see onstage. i could have seen the band in boston at some point anyway, right? i wouldn't have had to watch it all shift.
"and i can't change things, i can't change anything, but if i could, maybe i would and maybe that's wrong."
10.03.2004
postcard
status check - caffeinated
background ambiance - tristan prettyman, "anything at all"
hey _____! hope you're well. wish you were here - having a fun time!
xoxoxoxo
v.
for some reason, i am inexplicably drawn to morons. i should really work on that.
boston - grand.
museum of science - musical staircase was delightful, "lord of the rings" exhibit absolutely amazing. i'm an elf girl, in case you were wondering. i think i handled the potential drool factor quite well. peter jackson amazes me even more now that i know more of what went into the films ...
pre-tides - i swear i met the closest thing to zach braff without meeting THE zach braff.
tides - good set. seeing averi tonight will likely lead to the decision about my favorite area band - right now tides is poised to take over. a lot of energy - originals and three covers (in no particular order, "with or without you," "in your eyes" (stop snickering, beth) and an astounding "where the streets have no name").
background ambiance - tristan prettyman, "anything at all"
hey _____! hope you're well. wish you were here - having a fun time!
xoxoxoxo
v.
for some reason, i am inexplicably drawn to morons. i should really work on that.
boston - grand.
museum of science - musical staircase was delightful, "lord of the rings" exhibit absolutely amazing. i'm an elf girl, in case you were wondering. i think i handled the potential drool factor quite well. peter jackson amazes me even more now that i know more of what went into the films ...
pre-tides - i swear i met the closest thing to zach braff without meeting THE zach braff.
tides - good set. seeing averi tonight will likely lead to the decision about my favorite area band - right now tides is poised to take over. a lot of energy - originals and three covers (in no particular order, "with or without you," "in your eyes" (stop snickering, beth) and an astounding "where the streets have no name").
10.01.2004
my kind of month
status check - amused
background ambiance - silencio
october's shaping up to be a glorious month. i work one more day before i can hit the highways and drive my way back to the skyline i adore and the shows i've been looking forward to for weeks. with the added bonuses of a long weekend and my first excursion to the museum of science since ... i was ten years old? indeed. i remember dancing up and down the musical staircase with classmates - i'll have to fight the temptation to re-enact it.
more likely, make sure no one else is around.
all the while, i'll be covertly conducting research for the novel that will someday/perhaps/i-damn-well-hope-will be finished.
after my boston-trapsing, i return for a week and a half of work before another trip - hitting the skyways this time. it's official, i've finally procured tickets to fly to and from dc. beth and i will be making the trip down on the 14th, returning the following sunday. it'll be my first chunk of time in dc in 14 months, a statistic that i still can't quite wrap my brain around. it doesn't feel like it's been that long, but nevertheless ... i'm very much looking forward to the excursion. i'll be returning in such a better frame of mind than when i last left.
i love looking ahead when i have such exciting things to look ahead to.
p.s. i pity anyone who actually followed the debate drinking game. that would have gotten ugly real quick. but i love the fact that someone actually found this space by googling it ... brave souls at psu. hope the hangover isn't too intense ...
background ambiance - silencio
october's shaping up to be a glorious month. i work one more day before i can hit the highways and drive my way back to the skyline i adore and the shows i've been looking forward to for weeks. with the added bonuses of a long weekend and my first excursion to the museum of science since ... i was ten years old? indeed. i remember dancing up and down the musical staircase with classmates - i'll have to fight the temptation to re-enact it.
more likely, make sure no one else is around.
all the while, i'll be covertly conducting research for the novel that will someday/perhaps/i-damn-well-hope-will be finished.
after my boston-trapsing, i return for a week and a half of work before another trip - hitting the skyways this time. it's official, i've finally procured tickets to fly to and from dc. beth and i will be making the trip down on the 14th, returning the following sunday. it'll be my first chunk of time in dc in 14 months, a statistic that i still can't quite wrap my brain around. it doesn't feel like it's been that long, but nevertheless ... i'm very much looking forward to the excursion. i'll be returning in such a better frame of mind than when i last left.
i love looking ahead when i have such exciting things to look ahead to.
p.s. i pity anyone who actually followed the debate drinking game. that would have gotten ugly real quick. but i love the fact that someone actually found this space by googling it ... brave souls at psu. hope the hangover isn't too intense ...
9.30.2004
um ...
status check - still awake, dammit
background ambiance - silence
i wasn't happy with the review i filed when i left work at quarter to twelve. now it's quarter to two and i'm at home, staring at the bloody screen trying to get my thoughts out just right.
perfectionist? me? when it comes to my potential criticism career?
i don't know what you're talking about. nosiree.
background ambiance - silence
i wasn't happy with the review i filed when i left work at quarter to twelve. now it's quarter to two and i'm at home, staring at the bloody screen trying to get my thoughts out just right.
perfectionist? me? when it comes to my potential criticism career?
i don't know what you're talking about. nosiree.
9.29.2004
next year, man
status check - fuzzy
background ambiance - same sounds, different day
head = fuzzy. i woke up (late) this morning, thoroughly discombobulated because i could have sworn i'd heard my mother call my name. well, turns out i wasn't totally crazy. she actually was outside my bedroom window with my father, both laughing at the confused look on my face. on their way home from a minibreak in upstate new york, they decided to swing by burlington and take me out to an early lunch. and wake me up. a nice surprise, albeit a random one.
so i started out the day confused and it's continued throughout this early afternoon. i'm just plugging away, doing what i can and preparing to go to the theater tonight (hurrah!).
turns out pete didn't come out on top in "best acoustic" at the sdmas - i was 1-for-5 in terms of vix picks. whoops. but i'm pleased to have gotten that one right - mraz won "artist of the year" for the third straight year. and that's pretty badass, so i've got to say congratulations for that! and i'm happy for tristan's nod, even if i'd hoped pete would have gotten it.
it doesn't feel like wednesday. i have no idea of what day it feels like, but definitely not wednesday. maybe next thursday or something. i've given up trying to argue with the calendar and am instead thinking those fuzzy-head thoughts that make for amusing reflection later on. for example, i'm thinking about how i'd like to try to learn a new language. maybe it's time i worked on learning at least passingly fair french or spanish. i want to read 'war and peace' so i can joke about it with knowledge. i want to start really running again as soon as the stuffiness subsides. i really want to learn how to play my damn guitar already.
??? i have no clue, either.
background ambiance - same sounds, different day
head = fuzzy. i woke up (late) this morning, thoroughly discombobulated because i could have sworn i'd heard my mother call my name. well, turns out i wasn't totally crazy. she actually was outside my bedroom window with my father, both laughing at the confused look on my face. on their way home from a minibreak in upstate new york, they decided to swing by burlington and take me out to an early lunch. and wake me up. a nice surprise, albeit a random one.
so i started out the day confused and it's continued throughout this early afternoon. i'm just plugging away, doing what i can and preparing to go to the theater tonight (hurrah!).
turns out pete didn't come out on top in "best acoustic" at the sdmas - i was 1-for-5 in terms of vix picks. whoops. but i'm pleased to have gotten that one right - mraz won "artist of the year" for the third straight year. and that's pretty badass, so i've got to say congratulations for that! and i'm happy for tristan's nod, even if i'd hoped pete would have gotten it.
it doesn't feel like wednesday. i have no idea of what day it feels like, but definitely not wednesday. maybe next thursday or something. i've given up trying to argue with the calendar and am instead thinking those fuzzy-head thoughts that make for amusing reflection later on. for example, i'm thinking about how i'd like to try to learn a new language. maybe it's time i worked on learning at least passingly fair french or spanish. i want to read 'war and peace' so i can joke about it with knowledge. i want to start really running again as soon as the stuffiness subsides. i really want to learn how to play my damn guitar already.
??? i have no clue, either.
9.28.2004
mark your calendars
status check - optimistic
background ambiance - same
ok kids. i'm cali-bound come february. while it's all winter wonder-lousy here, i'll be getting a short sun-soaked break while listening to music, laughing and enjoying a drink at java joes.
now i have to figure out how the hell do pull it off. but regardless. i'm going to make the vacation visit work.
background ambiance - same
ok kids. i'm cali-bound come february. while it's all winter wonder-lousy here, i'll be getting a short sun-soaked break while listening to music, laughing and enjoying a drink at java joes.
now i have to figure out how the hell do pull it off. but regardless. i'm going to make the vacation visit work.
stetson's = nectar's
status check - amused
background ambiance - same old, same old
leave it to someone at wonkette to come up with this. perfect. except the stetson's reference, as i can't get back to that fun lil' place come thursday. amend to nectar's or manhattan's, perhaps?
Debate Drinking Game and Not Drinking Game
A Wonkette operative sent along a fairly straightforward debate drinking game, which we provide for you edification and inebriation after the jump. We, however, can't wait until Thursday to start drinking, not when there are so many good reasons to start now. So many, in fact, we don't need an excuse to drink, exactly. . . So anytime:
• Anyone tells that story about Bobby Kennedy turning up the thermostat before the Kennedy-Nixon debate: Take a sip of a hot toddy.
• Doris Kearns Goodwin mentions Lyndon Johnson: Pee outside.
• Someone shows a clip of Al Gore sighing: Recount your chads.
• A Republican operative compares Kerry to a classical orator: Drink an ouzo-and-hemlock cocktail.
• A Democrat operative uses the phrase "can't run on his record": Go to Stetson's.
• A Republican operative cites Kerry's prep school debate team experience: Try on a cheerleader outfit.
• A Democrat operative says that Bush "has never lost a debate": Try to look yourself in the eye.
• Someone plays the "you're no Jack Kennedy" clip: Lose anyway.
• Someone proclaims that "the entire race may come down to this": Move to Canada.
Start drinking for real after the jump.
Drink One Sip If:
Anyone says "terrorism"
Anyone says "Halliburton"
Anyone says "flip flop"
Anyone says "Saddam Hussein"
Anyone blames "the media"
Anyone mentions their own military service
Anyone says "September 11"
One candidate interrupts another candidate
Drink Two Sips If:
Bush says "cut and run"
Kerry says "W stands for wrong"
Either candidate talks past their time limit
Kerry brings up Bush's "Mission Accomplished" moment
Bush mentions Crawford, TX
Anyone looks at the wrong camera
Anyone whips out "evidence"
Anyone says "Osama bin Laden"
Anyone mentions blogs
Anyone invokes the hurricane sympathy vote
Anyone mentions "North Korea"
Kerry mentions Bush wants to reinstate the draft
Everytime you see anyone wearing the yellow "LiveSTRONG" bracelet
Finish Your Glass If:
Anyone in the audience gets dragged out of the auditorium
Anyone in the audience gets off an unscripted question
Bush mispronounces any word or name
Anyone says "Osama bin Hidin'"
Anyone uses a sports metaphor
Anyone attempts to speak Spanish to pander to Latinos
Do a Shot If:
Bush mentions the deficit
Bush accuses Kerry of being "French on terrorism"
Kerry accuses Bush of being a pansy for avoiding Vietnam
Bush admits he made a mistake ("miscalculation" counts)
Ralph Nader shows up insisting on airtime
Finish the Bottle If:
Anyone challenges anyone to a duel
The moderator rips off his mask to reveal his true identity is Karl Rove
background ambiance - same old, same old
leave it to someone at wonkette to come up with this. perfect. except the stetson's reference, as i can't get back to that fun lil' place come thursday. amend to nectar's or manhattan's, perhaps?
Debate Drinking Game and Not Drinking Game
A Wonkette operative sent along a fairly straightforward debate drinking game, which we provide for you edification and inebriation after the jump. We, however, can't wait until Thursday to start drinking, not when there are so many good reasons to start now. So many, in fact, we don't need an excuse to drink, exactly. . . So anytime:
• Anyone tells that story about Bobby Kennedy turning up the thermostat before the Kennedy-Nixon debate: Take a sip of a hot toddy.
• Doris Kearns Goodwin mentions Lyndon Johnson: Pee outside.
• Someone shows a clip of Al Gore sighing: Recount your chads.
• A Republican operative compares Kerry to a classical orator: Drink an ouzo-and-hemlock cocktail.
• A Democrat operative uses the phrase "can't run on his record": Go to Stetson's.
• A Republican operative cites Kerry's prep school debate team experience: Try on a cheerleader outfit.
• A Democrat operative says that Bush "has never lost a debate": Try to look yourself in the eye.
• Someone plays the "you're no Jack Kennedy" clip: Lose anyway.
• Someone proclaims that "the entire race may come down to this": Move to Canada.
Start drinking for real after the jump.
Drink One Sip If:
Anyone says "terrorism"
Anyone says "Halliburton"
Anyone says "flip flop"
Anyone says "Saddam Hussein"
Anyone blames "the media"
Anyone mentions their own military service
Anyone says "September 11"
One candidate interrupts another candidate
Drink Two Sips If:
Bush says "cut and run"
Kerry says "W stands for wrong"
Either candidate talks past their time limit
Kerry brings up Bush's "Mission Accomplished" moment
Bush mentions Crawford, TX
Anyone looks at the wrong camera
Anyone whips out "evidence"
Anyone says "Osama bin Laden"
Anyone mentions blogs
Anyone invokes the hurricane sympathy vote
Anyone mentions "North Korea"
Kerry mentions Bush wants to reinstate the draft
Everytime you see anyone wearing the yellow "LiveSTRONG" bracelet
Finish Your Glass If:
Anyone in the audience gets dragged out of the auditorium
Anyone in the audience gets off an unscripted question
Bush mispronounces any word or name
Anyone says "Osama bin Hidin'"
Anyone uses a sports metaphor
Anyone attempts to speak Spanish to pander to Latinos
Do a Shot If:
Bush mentions the deficit
Bush accuses Kerry of being "French on terrorism"
Kerry accuses Bush of being a pansy for avoiding Vietnam
Bush admits he made a mistake ("miscalculation" counts)
Ralph Nader shows up insisting on airtime
Finish the Bottle If:
Anyone challenges anyone to a duel
The moderator rips off his mask to reveal his true identity is Karl Rove
sniffles and smiles
status check - i've god a code
background ambiance - typical
i am the worst sick or quasi-sick person ever. seriously. i suck at it. any little thing and all of a sudden i'm wallowing on my deathbed. i admit that it's a character flaw - one that i'm working on and have gotten much better at. and i don't catch colds or suffer from illness very often. but when i do, man, it blows.
the phrase of the day, courtesy of the petester - "colds are not chill."
indeed.
but whatever. i'm determined to shake the cold doing whatever i need to. i'll drink my teas and swallow my vitamins. i'll get my rest and i'll soak up some sunshine. i'll keep busy while not overexerting myself. why? because, dammit, i've got a great few days coming up and i'm not going to sniffle my way through a single one of them.
and i'll smile at e-sunshine from my favorite friendly people. who somehow know precisely when i'm in need of a little pick-me-up and provide such warm fuzzies in their typically fabulous ways. thanks, dears.
and since i've been the recipient of positive thinking, i'll return the favor by sending some of my own - and asking you to do the same. sdmas are this evening and pete's up for an award. so, if you get a chance today, just think good pete acceptance speech or some similarly celebratory thoughts. because he's cool like that.
background ambiance - typical
i am the worst sick or quasi-sick person ever. seriously. i suck at it. any little thing and all of a sudden i'm wallowing on my deathbed. i admit that it's a character flaw - one that i'm working on and have gotten much better at. and i don't catch colds or suffer from illness very often. but when i do, man, it blows.
the phrase of the day, courtesy of the petester - "colds are not chill."
indeed.
but whatever. i'm determined to shake the cold doing whatever i need to. i'll drink my teas and swallow my vitamins. i'll get my rest and i'll soak up some sunshine. i'll keep busy while not overexerting myself. why? because, dammit, i've got a great few days coming up and i'm not going to sniffle my way through a single one of them.
and i'll smile at e-sunshine from my favorite friendly people. who somehow know precisely when i'm in need of a little pick-me-up and provide such warm fuzzies in their typically fabulous ways. thanks, dears.
and since i've been the recipient of positive thinking, i'll return the favor by sending some of my own - and asking you to do the same. sdmas are this evening and pete's up for an award. so, if you get a chance today, just think good pete acceptance speech or some similarly celebratory thoughts. because he's cool like that.
9.27.2004
clinched
status check - celebratory
background ambiance - NESN
red sox.
playoffs.
clinched.
hurrah!
g'night.
background ambiance - NESN
red sox.
playoffs.
clinched.
hurrah!
g'night.
when worlds collide
status check - surprised
background ambiance - scanner
for whatever reason, i never thought i'd come across howie day's name while getting my daily fix of wonkette dirt and wit.
nevertheless, what do i find today? howie's name (in bold, natch) in a snippet linking to this at the new york daily news:
Sen. John Edwards' daughter Cate slipped backstage after an acoustic set by Howie Day at the Conde Nast Grey Goose party at Tao. The Vice Presidential contender's fresh-from-Princeton lass gushed over Day's performance...
at least the girl's got taste, right?
background ambiance - scanner
for whatever reason, i never thought i'd come across howie day's name while getting my daily fix of wonkette dirt and wit.
nevertheless, what do i find today? howie's name (in bold, natch) in a snippet linking to this at the new york daily news:
Sen. John Edwards' daughter Cate slipped backstage after an acoustic set by Howie Day at the Conde Nast Grey Goose party at Tao. The Vice Presidential contender's fresh-from-Princeton lass gushed over Day's performance...
at least the girl's got taste, right?
dreamlife of yours truly
status check - good, good
background ambiance - typical
soooookay.
it's one of those random days that starts off a random week. looking at my schedule for the upcoming days, i realize there's little that will fall into any of my day-to-day style. it excites me as much as it preemptively tires me. such is life.
by this time next week, i will have attended a play, a movie, two concerts and a museum. i'll have more than enough for one week's worth of notebook nightlifing, but another concert will be approaching - the one in my crazy early october lineup i'm most eagerly anticipating. viva le rilo kiley!
perhaps my sleeping self has picked up on the amount of craziness looming for my conscious self, thus sprinkling my slumber with another series of vivid dreams. over the past several nights, i've had dreams both potentially philosophical (the "i need to go home, but where is home?" actf-esque dream of the night before last, complete with the "garden state ecstacy sequence" camera trick and appearances by acquaintances past and present) and downright random (one of last night's doubleheader dream sequence, which featured a certain oddly-coiffed musician i've been listening to for years throwing a flag into the audience and injuring someone). i've woken the last two mornings wishing i could just drift back off to sleep to see where else the dreams go.
they've also made me wonder if the people featured in the dreams' cast of characters have retained the qualities that obviously made an impression at different points of my life. i wonder if they've changed or if we'd be able to pick up our last conversations where we left them. and i wonder if i want to know if i ever cross their minds.
background ambiance - typical
soooookay.
it's one of those random days that starts off a random week. looking at my schedule for the upcoming days, i realize there's little that will fall into any of my day-to-day style. it excites me as much as it preemptively tires me. such is life.
by this time next week, i will have attended a play, a movie, two concerts and a museum. i'll have more than enough for one week's worth of notebook nightlifing, but another concert will be approaching - the one in my crazy early october lineup i'm most eagerly anticipating. viva le rilo kiley!
perhaps my sleeping self has picked up on the amount of craziness looming for my conscious self, thus sprinkling my slumber with another series of vivid dreams. over the past several nights, i've had dreams both potentially philosophical (the "i need to go home, but where is home?" actf-esque dream of the night before last, complete with the "garden state ecstacy sequence" camera trick and appearances by acquaintances past and present) and downright random (one of last night's doubleheader dream sequence, which featured a certain oddly-coiffed musician i've been listening to for years throwing a flag into the audience and injuring someone). i've woken the last two mornings wishing i could just drift back off to sleep to see where else the dreams go.
they've also made me wonder if the people featured in the dreams' cast of characters have retained the qualities that obviously made an impression at different points of my life. i wonder if they've changed or if we'd be able to pick up our last conversations where we left them. and i wonder if i want to know if i ever cross their minds.
9.24.2004
hard-to-get
status check - pleased
background ambiance - typical
i knew they'd come crawling back, begging for more. they always do.
or something.
after working myself silly this week, i'm rewarded with two (2) assignments for arts pieces next week.
bwahahaha. two cheers for tenacity!
background ambiance - typical
i knew they'd come crawling back, begging for more. they always do.
or something.
after working myself silly this week, i'm rewarded with two (2) assignments for arts pieces next week.
bwahahaha. two cheers for tenacity!
9.23.2004
nostalgia
status check - amused
background ambiance - typical
prompted by a message board thread i came across today. and, for the sake of all involved, not posted on the original thread. i just found it funny to think about, as it will very shortly be three years since i first heard about the band ...
... remember that first show? when chad played an accoustic solo version of "daffodils"? remember when neither he nor i could remember the second verse? remember the after-party at meg's, flipcup and thank yous?
... remember "the sweater song"?
... remember phone tag and email?
... remember the house of blues show?
... remember more phone tag? the call from dan's cafe?
... remember seeing averi sign glossies for the first time? and, linked, remember ian's "excuse me, can i buy you a dasani?"
... remember the best seats at the living room?
... remember finding the hobbit hole?
... remember two weeks?
... remember the handbag? becca's birthday wish and her ensuing chattiness?
... remember walkbys and kamikazis? me neither. "oh, we never said goodbye!" "uh, yeah we did."
... remember the trip to fpb? "shit, i inadvertantly cut off the averi-mobile."
... remember hoping that voice was just a cold and the layers were just a passing phase?
background ambiance - typical
prompted by a message board thread i came across today. and, for the sake of all involved, not posted on the original thread. i just found it funny to think about, as it will very shortly be three years since i first heard about the band ...
... remember that first show? when chad played an accoustic solo version of "daffodils"? remember when neither he nor i could remember the second verse? remember the after-party at meg's, flipcup and thank yous?
... remember "the sweater song"?
... remember phone tag and email?
... remember the house of blues show?
... remember more phone tag? the call from dan's cafe?
... remember seeing averi sign glossies for the first time? and, linked, remember ian's "excuse me, can i buy you a dasani?"
... remember the best seats at the living room?
... remember finding the hobbit hole?
... remember two weeks?
... remember the handbag? becca's birthday wish and her ensuing chattiness?
... remember walkbys and kamikazis? me neither. "oh, we never said goodbye!" "uh, yeah we did."
... remember the trip to fpb? "shit, i inadvertantly cut off the averi-mobile."
... remember hoping that voice was just a cold and the layers were just a passing phase?
ready. set. wait to go.
status check - pleased
background ambiance - daily show
ticket for tristan and company - purchased.
ticket for rilo kiley - being purchased tomorrow (courtesy of boston brother, therefore saving me ticketmaster shipping costs more than the price of the ticket itself - viva la capitalism).
ticket for tides - not necessary.
good times. reviews, singalongs and (i'm sure) misadventures - a week and a half away.
speaking of reviews, figured it's time i linked up the new space. it's new (read: one review) and i'm still figuring out quite where i want to go with this, but hey. my recently-created, soon-to-be-full-of-artsy-goodness "professional" blog is called notebook nightlife. hop on over, take a look and please don't hesitate to email me with comments on it as it begins to grow in content size. and, if you like it, spread the word and tell your friends.
funny how i can write on and on about little things, but the second i create something for the purpose of doing "what it is i want to do," i get all shy about getting it out there. occasional fear of failure much?
um, yeah. g'night.
background ambiance - daily show
ticket for tristan and company - purchased.
ticket for rilo kiley - being purchased tomorrow (courtesy of boston brother, therefore saving me ticketmaster shipping costs more than the price of the ticket itself - viva la capitalism).
ticket for tides - not necessary.
good times. reviews, singalongs and (i'm sure) misadventures - a week and a half away.
speaking of reviews, figured it's time i linked up the new space. it's new (read: one review) and i'm still figuring out quite where i want to go with this, but hey. my recently-created, soon-to-be-full-of-artsy-goodness "professional" blog is called notebook nightlife. hop on over, take a look and please don't hesitate to email me with comments on it as it begins to grow in content size. and, if you like it, spread the word and tell your friends.
funny how i can write on and on about little things, but the second i create something for the purpose of doing "what it is i want to do," i get all shy about getting it out there. occasional fear of failure much?
um, yeah. g'night.
9.22.2004
just call me cj
status check - restless
background ambiance - i've got a jazz concert at my window
remember the "west wing" episode in which cj spends the entire time trying to balance the egg on the table? and everyone else is laughing at her, telling her it won't work while she says, "no, i swear, i've seen it?"
for about an hour this afternoon, i could have sworn i was living out that episode. near exact dialogue and all.
it was creepy/cool.
background ambiance - i've got a jazz concert at my window
remember the "west wing" episode in which cj spends the entire time trying to balance the egg on the table? and everyone else is laughing at her, telling her it won't work while she says, "no, i swear, i've seen it?"
for about an hour this afternoon, i could have sworn i was living out that episode. near exact dialogue and all.
it was creepy/cool.
damn music
status check - annoyed, but not really
background ambiance - ben lee - dirty mind
i love/hate that everything could be delightfully lined up, would make more sense for me travel-wise, but still makes me feel stupid, in my own music-loving way.
it all pertains to that first potentially-extended boston weekend in october. i know i'll be in town saturday. i know i'll be in town tuesday. should i just stay in town sunday and monday night? i'd be able to write a crazy number of reviews for my new space (more info on it once it actually has some content). perhaps i could even pitch it to work.
but i'd be able to see tides saturday night, tristan/averi/gavin sunday night, rilo kiley tuesday night. and would be eliminating the need to drive back to vermont sunday, work monday and come back for rilo kiley tuesday. and still only have one actually vacation day taken off for it all.
i'd really like to see tristan live again. i could definitely do without gavin, but whatever. and averi?
well, i wouldn't be going to see averi. for once. they'll just happen to be there too.
***UPDATE: ah, screw it. i requested monday off. boston types - who wants to spend time with me during a long weekend? and who's in for a show at the roxy sunday night? tickets should be purchased shortly ... ***
background ambiance - ben lee - dirty mind
i love/hate that everything could be delightfully lined up, would make more sense for me travel-wise, but still makes me feel stupid, in my own music-loving way.
it all pertains to that first potentially-extended boston weekend in october. i know i'll be in town saturday. i know i'll be in town tuesday. should i just stay in town sunday and monday night? i'd be able to write a crazy number of reviews for my new space (more info on it once it actually has some content). perhaps i could even pitch it to work.
but i'd be able to see tides saturday night, tristan/averi/gavin sunday night, rilo kiley tuesday night. and would be eliminating the need to drive back to vermont sunday, work monday and come back for rilo kiley tuesday. and still only have one actually vacation day taken off for it all.
i'd really like to see tristan live again. i could definitely do without gavin, but whatever. and averi?
well, i wouldn't be going to see averi. for once. they'll just happen to be there too.
***UPDATE: ah, screw it. i requested monday off. boston types - who wants to spend time with me during a long weekend? and who's in for a show at the roxy sunday night? tickets should be purchased shortly ... ***
9.21.2004
ben's crazy. i like it.
status check - lovely
background ambiance - typical
after much thought and contemplation, i've decided that ben lee is just brilliantly mad.
i'll be honest, i wasn't expecting too much by the time ben came on stage. it was late on a monday night, the end of an extraordinarily long day, and there were about 30 people there. gregory douglass had played a typically strong set that, per usual, just failed to grab me for whatever reason. pony up had performed its hipster altera-pop, but i wasn't really feeling it until the last song, when they sang this hilarious ironic slam of rock stars that made me burst into laughter, cheer loudly and think of a certain person about whom the song might as well have been written.
so when ben came onstage after 11 p.m., i was prepared to apologize to beth for dragging her out to nectar's for a lathargic late-night show.
fortunately, ben performed the craziest, funniest, likeable set i've had the opportunity to attend. he looked like a little kid, with his mop of frizzy light brown hair, gray hoodie and too-long jeans. he sat on his chair, rocking back and forth so hard he nearly fell off on several occasions. he got the audience to sit cross-legged on the floor in front of the stage - all i could think of was "hipster kindergarten class." he spouted off about quantum physics, zen buddhism and being brave, telling us that we had to be brave, like english soldiers. we had to put energy into it, just as he was determined to put energy into it - he was ready to swim across the english channel for each of us. he covered "champagne supernova" for a laughing singalong. he sat onstage before he moved his chair to the audience and sat with his back to me, facing the band. he knelt on the floor, signing up into the mic, he sat on the edge of the stage, he ran outside to sing the last two songs on top of lara's car hood.
he made no sense while making perfect sense and i absolutely loved it. it was random in this fabulous, earnest way that made it impossible NOT to like him. he made sure to look each of us in the eye several times, ensuring that we were in it, we were there with him. and he'd laugh and speak with this fabulously warm australian accent that i couldn't help but smile at.
the best thing about the night is that i realized, in the midst of all this mayhem, that i was loving the music. he's an extremely tight guitarist and has a knack for knowing precisely when to bring the volume up or down for dramatic effect. his voice is intense and seasoned, but he can convey optimism and childlike eagerness when it counts.
and let's face it - the bit with the car hood was absolutely brilliant.
he'll be touring the country over the next couple of months, with stops in boston and at iota in the coming weeks - you'd be a fool not to check him out.
speaking of shows ... a couple of concert announcements.
- tristan prettyman at the roxy on oct. 3. i'm hoping i have monday off so i can hit that up and transform my crazy travels to boston into one nice, long, four-day weekend. tides, tristan and rilo kiley would make for one hell of a minibreak.
***update: oh shit ... if i do somehow manage to be able to attend that show, it's tristan, gavin decouldbegood and ... uh ... averi. haha - DAMMIT!***
- averi at the pickel barrell (killington) on oct. 16. i won't be there, but figured i would let others know of it ...
background ambiance - typical
after much thought and contemplation, i've decided that ben lee is just brilliantly mad.
i'll be honest, i wasn't expecting too much by the time ben came on stage. it was late on a monday night, the end of an extraordinarily long day, and there were about 30 people there. gregory douglass had played a typically strong set that, per usual, just failed to grab me for whatever reason. pony up had performed its hipster altera-pop, but i wasn't really feeling it until the last song, when they sang this hilarious ironic slam of rock stars that made me burst into laughter, cheer loudly and think of a certain person about whom the song might as well have been written.
so when ben came onstage after 11 p.m., i was prepared to apologize to beth for dragging her out to nectar's for a lathargic late-night show.
fortunately, ben performed the craziest, funniest, likeable set i've had the opportunity to attend. he looked like a little kid, with his mop of frizzy light brown hair, gray hoodie and too-long jeans. he sat on his chair, rocking back and forth so hard he nearly fell off on several occasions. he got the audience to sit cross-legged on the floor in front of the stage - all i could think of was "hipster kindergarten class." he spouted off about quantum physics, zen buddhism and being brave, telling us that we had to be brave, like english soldiers. we had to put energy into it, just as he was determined to put energy into it - he was ready to swim across the english channel for each of us. he covered "champagne supernova" for a laughing singalong. he sat onstage before he moved his chair to the audience and sat with his back to me, facing the band. he knelt on the floor, signing up into the mic, he sat on the edge of the stage, he ran outside to sing the last two songs on top of lara's car hood.
he made no sense while making perfect sense and i absolutely loved it. it was random in this fabulous, earnest way that made it impossible NOT to like him. he made sure to look each of us in the eye several times, ensuring that we were in it, we were there with him. and he'd laugh and speak with this fabulously warm australian accent that i couldn't help but smile at.
the best thing about the night is that i realized, in the midst of all this mayhem, that i was loving the music. he's an extremely tight guitarist and has a knack for knowing precisely when to bring the volume up or down for dramatic effect. his voice is intense and seasoned, but he can convey optimism and childlike eagerness when it counts.
and let's face it - the bit with the car hood was absolutely brilliant.
he'll be touring the country over the next couple of months, with stops in boston and at iota in the coming weeks - you'd be a fool not to check him out.
speaking of shows ... a couple of concert announcements.
- tristan prettyman at the roxy on oct. 3. i'm hoping i have monday off so i can hit that up and transform my crazy travels to boston into one nice, long, four-day weekend. tides, tristan and rilo kiley would make for one hell of a minibreak.
***update: oh shit ... if i do somehow manage to be able to attend that show, it's tristan, gavin decouldbegood and ... uh ... averi. haha - DAMMIT!***
- averi at the pickel barrell (killington) on oct. 16. i won't be there, but figured i would let others know of it ...
the english fucking channel
status check - dazed
background ambiance - ben lee's stuck in my head
so ... ok, here goes. i've been to some random shows. i've been to some RANDOM shows.
but i think ben lee's set at nectar's takes top prize for randomness. in a hilarious, brilliant sort of way. i think.
until i can get the whole experience written up ala review for work (and thus provide a link here), i'll leave you with this bit.
with two songs left in his set, the already-certifiably insane ben lee decides that we all need to go outside for the end of the show. he stands on a car hood to play, keeps going on about how we're soldiers crossing the english channel and, once a cop car stops by the car on which he's standing, he waves and says, "soldiers! english channel!" and the cop drives on.
the best part is that i had a hilarious time at the show and discovered that i loved his music at the same time. all in all, a most random success.
background ambiance - ben lee's stuck in my head
so ... ok, here goes. i've been to some random shows. i've been to some RANDOM shows.
but i think ben lee's set at nectar's takes top prize for randomness. in a hilarious, brilliant sort of way. i think.
until i can get the whole experience written up ala review for work (and thus provide a link here), i'll leave you with this bit.
with two songs left in his set, the already-certifiably insane ben lee decides that we all need to go outside for the end of the show. he stands on a car hood to play, keeps going on about how we're soldiers crossing the english channel and, once a cop car stops by the car on which he's standing, he waves and says, "soldiers! english channel!" and the cop drives on.
the best part is that i had a hilarious time at the show and discovered that i loved his music at the same time. all in all, a most random success.
9.20.2004
monday
status check - good, tired
background ambiance - typical
so tired i'm wired. the activity-filled weekend flew by in a blur of river-exploring, downtown-walking and cocktail-sipping, leaving me amazed at how quickly it went by - and drained. in that good, productive, had a fun time sort of way.
there's something about introducing where you live to someone who's never been there before - you gain a renewed sense of appreciation for those items and elements you generally take for granted. it's a nice feeling - you can sit back at the end of the visiting and realize that things here are pretty alright afterall. and your wanderlust tendancies are temporarily abated.
autumn arrived on saturday. it was a surprisingly pronounced entrance - i went to sleep in lightweight long-sleeves weather and woke up in dire need of my sweater stash. i noticed for the first time that the green tree leaves are lined in red and amber. and i felt the first need to enjoy a meal outside with a nice warm mug of beverage - hot cider, no less. i was pleased to realize my favorite season has begun, but saddened at the same time. autumn is always bittersweet, as you know the winter aches and pains will follow the crisp, rosy-cheeked delights of fall.
but it was a grand weekend to spend exploring - mother nature cooperated with our agenda beautifully. for once. and casa de racca was filled with voices and laughter - can't go wrong there. friendly faces. reunions hundreds of miles from the original meeting places. technicolor sunset over the lake and the taste of sugar on the rim of my cocktail glass - not too shabby at all. thanks for the fun times.
as for now, i'm turning my attention to the second part of my split newsday. when regular work comes to a close, i'll enjoy some live music, as well as the fact that i'll be able to write about it tomorrow and ultimately see it in print.
background ambiance - typical
so tired i'm wired. the activity-filled weekend flew by in a blur of river-exploring, downtown-walking and cocktail-sipping, leaving me amazed at how quickly it went by - and drained. in that good, productive, had a fun time sort of way.
there's something about introducing where you live to someone who's never been there before - you gain a renewed sense of appreciation for those items and elements you generally take for granted. it's a nice feeling - you can sit back at the end of the visiting and realize that things here are pretty alright afterall. and your wanderlust tendancies are temporarily abated.
autumn arrived on saturday. it was a surprisingly pronounced entrance - i went to sleep in lightweight long-sleeves weather and woke up in dire need of my sweater stash. i noticed for the first time that the green tree leaves are lined in red and amber. and i felt the first need to enjoy a meal outside with a nice warm mug of beverage - hot cider, no less. i was pleased to realize my favorite season has begun, but saddened at the same time. autumn is always bittersweet, as you know the winter aches and pains will follow the crisp, rosy-cheeked delights of fall.
but it was a grand weekend to spend exploring - mother nature cooperated with our agenda beautifully. for once. and casa de racca was filled with voices and laughter - can't go wrong there. friendly faces. reunions hundreds of miles from the original meeting places. technicolor sunset over the lake and the taste of sugar on the rim of my cocktail glass - not too shabby at all. thanks for the fun times.
as for now, i'm turning my attention to the second part of my split newsday. when regular work comes to a close, i'll enjoy some live music, as well as the fact that i'll be able to write about it tomorrow and ultimately see it in print.
9.17.2004
the timing ...
status check - so amused
background ambiance - typical
... is so close to perfect. but not quite. why? i'll explain.
i'm sitting here at my desk, laughing myself silly. i think the humor is enhanced by the fact that it looks like i'll be in dc that weekend. pity we're flying back on sunday - that would be the most interesting experience ever.
averi - 10.17 - the funk box, baltimore, md. - with jordan knight.
yes. THAT jordan knight.
since i watched "bands reunited: new kids on the block" recently, i happen to know that jordan's on tour supporting his latest album, which features his new interpretations of new kids songs. if i were in the area that day (well, beyond that morning, anyway), i would go in a heartbeat.
no, seriously. i totally would.
background ambiance - typical
... is so close to perfect. but not quite. why? i'll explain.
i'm sitting here at my desk, laughing myself silly. i think the humor is enhanced by the fact that it looks like i'll be in dc that weekend. pity we're flying back on sunday - that would be the most interesting experience ever.
averi - 10.17 - the funk box, baltimore, md. - with jordan knight.
yes. THAT jordan knight.
since i watched "bands reunited: new kids on the block" recently, i happen to know that jordan's on tour supporting his latest album, which features his new interpretations of new kids songs. if i were in the area that day (well, beyond that morning, anyway), i would go in a heartbeat.
no, seriously. i totally would.
9.16.2004
update
status check - pleased
background ambiance - howie day - annalise
happy times here. i received a second-place award for arts writing. tomorrow i get to go to the airport and welcome a paul to vermont. becca's coming up for the weekend. i'm figuring out when i'm going to visit dc. next week, i'm starting a new e-space where i will post reviews for a&e shows/cds/whatever else seems to fit. there are a ridiculous number of shows coming up that i'm looking forward to attending. i'll be visiting boston soon. i have lovely friends and i feel more comfortable with myself than i have in quite some time.
things are on the up and up. i can feel it.
background ambiance - howie day - annalise
happy times here. i received a second-place award for arts writing. tomorrow i get to go to the airport and welcome a paul to vermont. becca's coming up for the weekend. i'm figuring out when i'm going to visit dc. next week, i'm starting a new e-space where i will post reviews for a&e shows/cds/whatever else seems to fit. there are a ridiculous number of shows coming up that i'm looking forward to attending. i'll be visiting boston soon. i have lovely friends and i feel more comfortable with myself than i have in quite some time.
things are on the up and up. i can feel it.
how crazy am i?
status check - contemplative
background ambiance - kid lightning - ghost
so ... kid lightning's playing the lizard lounge next saturday (9.25). i'm intrigued by what i've heard on myspace and would like to attend ... but that would mean i'd go to boston next weekend, the weekend after that, AND 10.5. then take one weekend off and possibly return for howie on the 16th.
must contemplate this ...
background ambiance - kid lightning - ghost
so ... kid lightning's playing the lizard lounge next saturday (9.25). i'm intrigued by what i've heard on myspace and would like to attend ... but that would mean i'd go to boston next weekend, the weekend after that, AND 10.5. then take one weekend off and possibly return for howie on the 16th.
must contemplate this ...
9.15.2004
...
status check - peachy
background ambiance - television
in her writing, she made the most of every scrap of personal experience she thought she could use for liteary material ...
"i'm sarcastic, skeptical and sometimes callous because i'm still afraid, deep down, of letting myself be hurt. there's a vulnerable core in me which every egoist has ..."
- bitter fame, a life of sylvia plath
background ambiance - television
in her writing, she made the most of every scrap of personal experience she thought she could use for liteary material ...
"i'm sarcastic, skeptical and sometimes callous because i'm still afraid, deep down, of letting myself be hurt. there's a vulnerable core in me which every egoist has ..."
- bitter fame, a life of sylvia plath
9.14.2004
hmm ...
status check - amused, annoyed
background ambiance - typical
Q Scott, does anyone in the administration or the campaign that you know of share the First Lady's view that the documents about the President's record are fake?
MR. McCLELLAN: I can speak to our view, the White House view. I mean, obviously, she was -- Mrs. Bush was expressing her view, and there have been, as you're aware, a number of continuing questions raised about those documents. And media organizations are continuing to investigate it further. And we look forward to seeing what the results of those investigations are. And those are serious issues --
Q Have you looked --
MR. McCLELLAN: No, we're not doing our own investigation to look into the authenticity. There are serious questions that have been raised and they should be looked into.
Q By?
MR. McCLELLAN: Well, media organizations are already doing -- I'd say most media organizations are already -- or many media organizations are already investigating the questions that have been raised about these documents' authenticity.
Q But you're only calling for an investigation -- when you say you want it looked into, you only want it looked into by the media. You're not suggesting some type of --
MR. McCLELLAN: Yes, I think I said the same thing the last few days, that it ought to be looked into.
now i think only an idiot would make the mistake of the superscripted "th" in those documents. no one who was actually trying to pass the documents off as authentic. now call me crazy and liberal, but i believe they were created by w's people. and the fact that no one official is going to investigate allegations against el presidente only makes me more of a believer.
and if i hear mcclellen say "recycled" one more time ...
in happier news, read this and this. i'm so looking forward to the oct. 5 show ...
Any idiot can play Greek for a day
and join a sorority or write a tragedy
and articulating all that pain
and maybe you'll get paid.
But it's a sin when success complains,
and your writers block- it don't mean shit.
Just throw it against the wall and see what sticks.
Gotta write a hit.
I think this is it.
It's a hit.
background ambiance - typical
Q Scott, does anyone in the administration or the campaign that you know of share the First Lady's view that the documents about the President's record are fake?
MR. McCLELLAN: I can speak to our view, the White House view. I mean, obviously, she was -- Mrs. Bush was expressing her view, and there have been, as you're aware, a number of continuing questions raised about those documents. And media organizations are continuing to investigate it further. And we look forward to seeing what the results of those investigations are. And those are serious issues --
Q Have you looked --
MR. McCLELLAN: No, we're not doing our own investigation to look into the authenticity. There are serious questions that have been raised and they should be looked into.
Q By?
MR. McCLELLAN: Well, media organizations are already doing -- I'd say most media organizations are already -- or many media organizations are already investigating the questions that have been raised about these documents' authenticity.
Q But you're only calling for an investigation -- when you say you want it looked into, you only want it looked into by the media. You're not suggesting some type of --
MR. McCLELLAN: Yes, I think I said the same thing the last few days, that it ought to be looked into.
now i think only an idiot would make the mistake of the superscripted "th" in those documents. no one who was actually trying to pass the documents off as authentic. now call me crazy and liberal, but i believe they were created by w's people. and the fact that no one official is going to investigate allegations against el presidente only makes me more of a believer.
and if i hear mcclellen say "recycled" one more time ...
in happier news, read this and this. i'm so looking forward to the oct. 5 show ...
Any idiot can play Greek for a day
and join a sorority or write a tragedy
and articulating all that pain
and maybe you'll get paid.
But it's a sin when success complains,
and your writers block- it don't mean shit.
Just throw it against the wall and see what sticks.
Gotta write a hit.
I think this is it.
It's a hit.
9.13.2004
p.s. vanity kills
status check - laughing
background ambiance - same
stepped outside for a moment to enjoy the lovely fall day and was walking down a side street. i've been feeling snazzy all day, as i went shopping this weekend and am sporting a new outfit that i'm quite fond of. but as i was walking, i had one moment where i realized, "hey, know what? i look good today."
straight out of a romantic comedy or something, just after the thought passes through my mind, my shoe hits a crack in the pavement and i fall to the ground - in the least graceful possible manner. arms flying, small shriek and thud included.
i limped my way back to the office, snazzy outfit no worse for the wear - but my ego bruised even more than my knee.
i never get hurt when i'm being self-depricating - i must remember that.
background ambiance - same
stepped outside for a moment to enjoy the lovely fall day and was walking down a side street. i've been feeling snazzy all day, as i went shopping this weekend and am sporting a new outfit that i'm quite fond of. but as i was walking, i had one moment where i realized, "hey, know what? i look good today."
straight out of a romantic comedy or something, just after the thought passes through my mind, my shoe hits a crack in the pavement and i fall to the ground - in the least graceful possible manner. arms flying, small shriek and thud included.
i limped my way back to the office, snazzy outfit no worse for the wear - but my ego bruised even more than my knee.
i never get hurt when i'm being self-depricating - i must remember that.
notes from a monday
status check - just ducky
background ambiance - typical
- if you're at all into classic hollywood and, more so, knowing what was really going on during c.h.'s heydey (as i am), i recommend "de-lovely." caught a screening last night, during which i was the youngest audience member by a good two decades at least. after you adjust to the interesting format with which the film covers the story arc, it's a good, seemingly-close-to-honest-by-hollywood-standards type of film. which means it's not pretty subject matter set against a decidely pretty series of backdrops and locations ... and hell, it has kevin kline, who just rocks my world. "emperor's club aside" (aka: "dead poets society the sequel"), i'd go to almost any movie if kevin kline's in it.
- "the compleat works of wllm shkspr [abridged]" - cute, fun play. had i been a theater major in college, that show would have made the perfect victoria senior sem.
- defamer points out a deal for "1/4life" - Marshall Herskovitz and Ed Zwick get an ABC pilot deal for 1/4Life, a drama focused on friends living in Chicago undergoing post-college mid-20's crises; think of it as thirtysomething before receding hairlines and erectile dysfunction set in. i find it funny that i can't hear any references to "quarter-life" without feeling this ridiculous urge to defend mayer's use of it above all others. even though i know people must have used the expression before i heard it for the first time in "why georgia" all those years ago - and even though mayer sucks now.
- read "the rule of four." i picked it up yesterday (after many attempts at telling myself i shouldn't buy it until it comes out in paperback, i caved) and read it in its entirety. i don't think it can be appropriately compared to "the da vinci code," though - yes, they're both intelligent novels based on puzzles and history, but apples and oranges. both very good.
- i'm ridiculously pleased to realize a number of concerts are on the horizon. as will be a temporary relapse into spending every other weekend in boston ...
- finally, while i've said it before, i'll say it again. for your own sake, read zach braff's blog, man.
background ambiance - typical
- if you're at all into classic hollywood and, more so, knowing what was really going on during c.h.'s heydey (as i am), i recommend "de-lovely." caught a screening last night, during which i was the youngest audience member by a good two decades at least. after you adjust to the interesting format with which the film covers the story arc, it's a good, seemingly-close-to-honest-by-hollywood-standards type of film. which means it's not pretty subject matter set against a decidely pretty series of backdrops and locations ... and hell, it has kevin kline, who just rocks my world. "emperor's club aside" (aka: "dead poets society the sequel"), i'd go to almost any movie if kevin kline's in it.
- "the compleat works of wllm shkspr [abridged]" - cute, fun play. had i been a theater major in college, that show would have made the perfect victoria senior sem.
- defamer points out a deal for "1/4life" - Marshall Herskovitz and Ed Zwick get an ABC pilot deal for 1/4Life, a drama focused on friends living in Chicago undergoing post-college mid-20's crises; think of it as thirtysomething before receding hairlines and erectile dysfunction set in. i find it funny that i can't hear any references to "quarter-life" without feeling this ridiculous urge to defend mayer's use of it above all others. even though i know people must have used the expression before i heard it for the first time in "why georgia" all those years ago - and even though mayer sucks now.
- read "the rule of four." i picked it up yesterday (after many attempts at telling myself i shouldn't buy it until it comes out in paperback, i caved) and read it in its entirety. i don't think it can be appropriately compared to "the da vinci code," though - yes, they're both intelligent novels based on puzzles and history, but apples and oranges. both very good.
- i'm ridiculously pleased to realize a number of concerts are on the horizon. as will be a temporary relapse into spending every other weekend in boston ...
- finally, while i've said it before, i'll say it again. for your own sake, read zach braff's blog, man.
concert alert
status check - pleased
background ambiance - rachel yamagata - letter read
saturday, october 16. howie day - solo - at the orpheum.
i plan on attending and will buy my ticket within a day or two. anyone else?
background ambiance - rachel yamagata - letter read
saturday, october 16. howie day - solo - at the orpheum.
i plan on attending and will buy my ticket within a day or two. anyone else?
9.11.2004
rock art
status check - pre-play giddiness
background ambiance - gpaltrow on "inside the actors studio"
like many burlingtonians, i spent part of my saturday hopping around the south end in an artistic manner. the annual art hop opened south end shops and galleries to the art-hungry public, with more installations, pieces and drawings than i was possibly able to view during my brief afternoon trapsing.
i did, however, make a point to stop by the indoor-skatepark-turned-gallery on the corner of battery and king. photos and posters from the higher ground days ... heavenly. it was fascinating to realize just who had made their way to hg on the way toward musical brilliance - and thoroughly distressing that i had missed so many amazing shows. modest mouse in 2000, with the shins opening? guster's 9.9.99 show? norah jones, elliott smith (several times), and others? oy. when hg opens in its new space, i'm going to frequent it much more frequently. and do some research when they put out the new schedules.
but there were a couple of posters that made me smile, as the memories of the show popped back into my mind. cherry poppin' daddies with will and collin sporting the zoot suits - fun vintage-looking poster for that one. a simple, yet bold poster for damien rice's april show (the last time i was in hg) made me think of the silence in the house while he covered "hallelujah."
those posters - that's my kind of art. don't get me wrong - i adore matisse and picasso. my van gogh print is my favorite piece of art, while i'm a sucker for vintage posters of the french persuasion. but at the top of my favorites? art posters for my favorite musicians. that's why i hold onto the posters i get, after all - and why i just went through the whole process of creating huge framed collages of the pieces i've acquired. a combination of art and the immediacy of the musical memories they conjure ... heavenly.
background ambiance - gpaltrow on "inside the actors studio"
like many burlingtonians, i spent part of my saturday hopping around the south end in an artistic manner. the annual art hop opened south end shops and galleries to the art-hungry public, with more installations, pieces and drawings than i was possibly able to view during my brief afternoon trapsing.
i did, however, make a point to stop by the indoor-skatepark-turned-gallery on the corner of battery and king. photos and posters from the higher ground days ... heavenly. it was fascinating to realize just who had made their way to hg on the way toward musical brilliance - and thoroughly distressing that i had missed so many amazing shows. modest mouse in 2000, with the shins opening? guster's 9.9.99 show? norah jones, elliott smith (several times), and others? oy. when hg opens in its new space, i'm going to frequent it much more frequently. and do some research when they put out the new schedules.
but there were a couple of posters that made me smile, as the memories of the show popped back into my mind. cherry poppin' daddies with will and collin sporting the zoot suits - fun vintage-looking poster for that one. a simple, yet bold poster for damien rice's april show (the last time i was in hg) made me think of the silence in the house while he covered "hallelujah."
those posters - that's my kind of art. don't get me wrong - i adore matisse and picasso. my van gogh print is my favorite piece of art, while i'm a sucker for vintage posters of the french persuasion. but at the top of my favorites? art posters for my favorite musicians. that's why i hold onto the posters i get, after all - and why i just went through the whole process of creating huge framed collages of the pieces i've acquired. a combination of art and the immediacy of the musical memories they conjure ... heavenly.
9.09.2004
present
status check - here
background ambiance - keyboards
sometimes i feel obligated to write at least something in this little space. afterall, if the roles are reversed and i'm looking at someone else's space, i'm the first to wish for something new from the author to read and, if i'm lucky, even enjoy. so when i go without writing, i feel like i'm being a hypocrite.
but sometimes there just isn't anything to write. nothing's going badly, but you're just plugging away at your job or doing whatever at home. you're kept busy so the day flies by and you realize you are on the home stretch and you didn't even fully realize when the sun set and night began. time is ticking right on by and you're oblivious to the entire thing, focusing on what you're supposedly supposed to be focusing on until you can say goodbye for the night and, if you're feeling ambitious, perhaps go for a run upstairs before leaving the building.
more so for the possibility that it'll make you tired and you'll sleep better than any health or physical improvement factors. you're on pacific time without ever standing on the shore of the pacific - everything, from waking up to drifting off to sleep, is about three hours off schedule. which is the smarter choice - to adapt your sleep schedule to your present time zone or adapt your time zone to your present sleep schedule?
background ambiance - keyboards
sometimes i feel obligated to write at least something in this little space. afterall, if the roles are reversed and i'm looking at someone else's space, i'm the first to wish for something new from the author to read and, if i'm lucky, even enjoy. so when i go without writing, i feel like i'm being a hypocrite.
but sometimes there just isn't anything to write. nothing's going badly, but you're just plugging away at your job or doing whatever at home. you're kept busy so the day flies by and you realize you are on the home stretch and you didn't even fully realize when the sun set and night began. time is ticking right on by and you're oblivious to the entire thing, focusing on what you're supposedly supposed to be focusing on until you can say goodbye for the night and, if you're feeling ambitious, perhaps go for a run upstairs before leaving the building.
more so for the possibility that it'll make you tired and you'll sleep better than any health or physical improvement factors. you're on pacific time without ever standing on the shore of the pacific - everything, from waking up to drifting off to sleep, is about three hours off schedule. which is the smarter choice - to adapt your sleep schedule to your present time zone or adapt your time zone to your present sleep schedule?
9.08.2004
necessary procrastination
status check - decent
background ambiance - typical background for a wednesday evening
sometimes you just need to push the work away for a couple of minutes so you can come back to it clear-headed. hence the pointless appeal of surveys ...
1. Of all the bands/artists in your cd/record collection, which one do you own the most albums by?
actual studio albums or cds in general? if we're going studio releases, it would be jeff buckley, followed closely by dmb. but if it's live shows or just general burned cds, either howie day or jmraz. i have a crazy number of both.
2. What was the last song you listened to (voluntarily)?
beautiful, beautiful - tristan prettyman & g love. although i wouldn't say it's necessarily voluntary, as the song's more of an addiction.
3. What's on your record player right now?
i lack a record player. but i'd rather like one. my cd player (car) has my latest burned mix, which includes tracks by tprettyman (w/g love), jmraz, pthurston, guster, hday, sheblondeswede and bushwalla.
4. What song would you say sums you up...:
i've yet to hear a song that sums me up. i challenge you to write it. but closest? "pictures of success." rilo kiley.
5. What's your favorite local band?
burlington doesn't have a great local scene, so i'll go with boston. averi, followed closely (very, very closely) by tides.
6. What was the last show you attended?
hmm. averi at middle earth? yep.
7. What was the greatest show you've ever been to?
oh god, i couldn't answer that even if i wanted to.
8. What's the shittiest band you've ever seen in concert?
early 2002. met cafe, providence. we sought refuge from the cold after leaving mayer and his musical masterbation to try to find lars and pete. didn't find them, so we went in for this show where we were two of six fans. the only two who weren't related to the band. the band broke up seven minutes later. we were back in the cold and out ten bucks each.
9. What band do you love musically but hate the members of?
i don't generally hate anyone i listen to.
10. What is the most musically involved you have ever been?
at different times, i've been a one-time concert co-organizer/promoter (the organization worked out brilliantly, the promotion not so much), college radio dj and freelance live music critic. one of my college homes also served as an occasional lodging space for a couple of bands.
11. What show are you looking forward to?
rilo kiley is playing the middle east on oct. 5. i don't care what i have to do, i'm going to be there for it.
12. What is your favorite band shirt?
that i own? my old-school edna's goldfish t-shirt.
that someone else owns? the band shirt i made beth. "they play for you. they buy shots for me."
13. What musician would you like to hang out with for a day?
i'd love to chat with bono, but i don't know if i'd last a whole day. ani would be cool to meet, as would adam duritz. or rivers cuomo.
ah, hell, i just want to get out to california already and chill with pete and bushwalla. drinks at java joe's, please.
14. What musician would you like to hump for a day?
it would be hard to choose. the one time i'd be down with an orgy ...
15. Metal question-Jeans and Leather vs. Cracker Jack clothes...
jeans and leather.
16. Sabbath or solo Ozzy?
sabbath.
17. Commodores or solo Lionel Ritchie?
whichever's alright.
18. Blackjack or solo Michael Bolton?
i don't know blackjack. yet i'd probably be more down with blackjack than michael bolton. in fact, i'm sure of it.
19. Doesn't Primus suck?
i listened to primus briefly at some point ... they obviously left a lasting impression.
20. Name 3 flawless albums:
jeff buckley - grace
radiohead - the bends
the beatles - sgt. pepper
21. Did you know that filling out this survey makes you a music geek?
it's music dork, thank you. and i was one long before.
22. What was the greatest decade for music?
1960s.
23. How many music-related videos/dvds do you own?
between the three of us in my flat, we own ... five. i believe. ok, fine. four are mine.
24. Do you like Journey?
oh come on. of course you do - a little. you sing along when you hear it on the radio. try denying it. guilty pleasure.
25. Don't try to pretend you don't.
there are some things about which you just don't pretend. journey? definitely one of them.
26. What is your favorite movie soundtrack?
"garden state" for the bitchin new, "good morning vietnam" for the bitchin old.
27. What was your last musical "phase" before you wisened up?
rage rock. early sophomore year of college. a whole lot of korn and limp bizkit going on. it wasn't pretty.
28. What's the crappiest CD/record/etc you've ever bought?
um ... this ohio band i heard was good. i can't even recall what they're called anymore.
29. Do you prefer vinyl or CDs?
cds, as i don't have a record player (hint). but i love the little pops and old sound of vinyl. try listening to the doors on a record player. heaven.
30. All totaled, how much do you spend on music a month? (including shows, records, admission to dance clubs)
depends. probably about one hundred? i'm not going to even figure in the gas money that gets me to boston. but sometimes more, sometimes less.
background ambiance - typical background for a wednesday evening
sometimes you just need to push the work away for a couple of minutes so you can come back to it clear-headed. hence the pointless appeal of surveys ...
1. Of all the bands/artists in your cd/record collection, which one do you own the most albums by?
actual studio albums or cds in general? if we're going studio releases, it would be jeff buckley, followed closely by dmb. but if it's live shows or just general burned cds, either howie day or jmraz. i have a crazy number of both.
2. What was the last song you listened to (voluntarily)?
beautiful, beautiful - tristan prettyman & g love. although i wouldn't say it's necessarily voluntary, as the song's more of an addiction.
3. What's on your record player right now?
i lack a record player. but i'd rather like one. my cd player (car) has my latest burned mix, which includes tracks by tprettyman (w/g love), jmraz, pthurston, guster, hday, sheblondeswede and bushwalla.
4. What song would you say sums you up...:
i've yet to hear a song that sums me up. i challenge you to write it. but closest? "pictures of success." rilo kiley.
5. What's your favorite local band?
burlington doesn't have a great local scene, so i'll go with boston. averi, followed closely (very, very closely) by tides.
6. What was the last show you attended?
hmm. averi at middle earth? yep.
7. What was the greatest show you've ever been to?
oh god, i couldn't answer that even if i wanted to.
8. What's the shittiest band you've ever seen in concert?
early 2002. met cafe, providence. we sought refuge from the cold after leaving mayer and his musical masterbation to try to find lars and pete. didn't find them, so we went in for this show where we were two of six fans. the only two who weren't related to the band. the band broke up seven minutes later. we were back in the cold and out ten bucks each.
9. What band do you love musically but hate the members of?
i don't generally hate anyone i listen to.
10. What is the most musically involved you have ever been?
at different times, i've been a one-time concert co-organizer/promoter (the organization worked out brilliantly, the promotion not so much), college radio dj and freelance live music critic. one of my college homes also served as an occasional lodging space for a couple of bands.
11. What show are you looking forward to?
rilo kiley is playing the middle east on oct. 5. i don't care what i have to do, i'm going to be there for it.
12. What is your favorite band shirt?
that i own? my old-school edna's goldfish t-shirt.
that someone else owns? the band shirt i made beth. "they play for you. they buy shots for me."
13. What musician would you like to hang out with for a day?
i'd love to chat with bono, but i don't know if i'd last a whole day. ani would be cool to meet, as would adam duritz. or rivers cuomo.
ah, hell, i just want to get out to california already and chill with pete and bushwalla. drinks at java joe's, please.
14. What musician would you like to hump for a day?
it would be hard to choose. the one time i'd be down with an orgy ...
15. Metal question-Jeans and Leather vs. Cracker Jack clothes...
jeans and leather.
16. Sabbath or solo Ozzy?
sabbath.
17. Commodores or solo Lionel Ritchie?
whichever's alright.
18. Blackjack or solo Michael Bolton?
i don't know blackjack. yet i'd probably be more down with blackjack than michael bolton. in fact, i'm sure of it.
19. Doesn't Primus suck?
i listened to primus briefly at some point ... they obviously left a lasting impression.
20. Name 3 flawless albums:
jeff buckley - grace
radiohead - the bends
the beatles - sgt. pepper
21. Did you know that filling out this survey makes you a music geek?
it's music dork, thank you. and i was one long before.
22. What was the greatest decade for music?
1960s.
23. How many music-related videos/dvds do you own?
between the three of us in my flat, we own ... five. i believe. ok, fine. four are mine.
24. Do you like Journey?
oh come on. of course you do - a little. you sing along when you hear it on the radio. try denying it. guilty pleasure.
25. Don't try to pretend you don't.
there are some things about which you just don't pretend. journey? definitely one of them.
26. What is your favorite movie soundtrack?
"garden state" for the bitchin new, "good morning vietnam" for the bitchin old.
27. What was your last musical "phase" before you wisened up?
rage rock. early sophomore year of college. a whole lot of korn and limp bizkit going on. it wasn't pretty.
28. What's the crappiest CD/record/etc you've ever bought?
um ... this ohio band i heard was good. i can't even recall what they're called anymore.
29. Do you prefer vinyl or CDs?
cds, as i don't have a record player (hint). but i love the little pops and old sound of vinyl. try listening to the doors on a record player. heaven.
30. All totaled, how much do you spend on music a month? (including shows, records, admission to dance clubs)
depends. probably about one hundred? i'm not going to even figure in the gas money that gets me to boston. but sometimes more, sometimes less.
singin in the rain
status check - self-depricating
background ambiance - keane - bedshaped
pity that i get in a really silly mood right when i'm supposed to be sleeping.
it's raining ridiculously hard outside, but it's one of those showers that started so suddenly that you feel like you're in the midst of a huge movie set and the direction just yelled "cue rain!"
it's night and an end-of-summer storm, yet it reminded me of the april shower over two years ago, running and sliding my way across the soaked marble in front of the kennedy center, one member of a cab search party ...
background ambiance - keane - bedshaped
pity that i get in a really silly mood right when i'm supposed to be sleeping.
it's raining ridiculously hard outside, but it's one of those showers that started so suddenly that you feel like you're in the midst of a huge movie set and the direction just yelled "cue rain!"
it's night and an end-of-summer storm, yet it reminded me of the april shower over two years ago, running and sliding my way across the soaked marble in front of the kennedy center, one member of a cab search party ...
9.06.2004
download time
status check - decent
background ambiance - silence
i haven't been able to stop playing g love and tristan's "beautiful, beautiful." it's addicting, in the best of ways. find and listen to it here. you can thank me after.
picked up something new and a few blasts from the past (love the used cd sales ...) during shopping today. the new tunes provided background music worthy of my ambitious, music-memorabilia-consolodation projects for the day. my mishmash of memories now looks truly bitchin.
but wanted to make special note of one purchase: rachael yamagata's happenstance. reminiscent of fiona apple, but with this kickass individuality that makes it clear that i'll be listening to this for awhile.
background ambiance - silence
i haven't been able to stop playing g love and tristan's "beautiful, beautiful." it's addicting, in the best of ways. find and listen to it here. you can thank me after.
picked up something new and a few blasts from the past (love the used cd sales ...) during shopping today. the new tunes provided background music worthy of my ambitious, music-memorabilia-consolodation projects for the day. my mishmash of memories now looks truly bitchin.
but wanted to make special note of one purchase: rachael yamagata's happenstance. reminiscent of fiona apple, but with this kickass individuality that makes it clear that i'll be listening to this for awhile.
thank you, mister asshole
status check - annoyed
background ambiance - freaked-out silence
what a fucking lovely weekend.
on friday, someone said that i was working to scratch my way up the journalistic ladder so i could get to a higher paper. it didn't come off as a compliment. such a cold view of the work i'm trying to do made me feel horrible.
on saturday, my mother laughed off my talk of "when i get to boston" with a series of "uh-huh"s. and then everything else i tried to say for my entire visit seemed to be dismissed in an equally flippant manner. that made me feel even worse.
and tonight, just as i thought i couldn't feel more upset, some asshole decided to take out one of the window panes in our sunroom. it's 2:30 a.m., i'm wide awake typing and all of a sudden i hear a smash in the next room. glass made it from the window pane all the way across the sunroom and into the chair nestled in the opposite corner. a quick inspection outside (me freaking out all the while) reveals a large branch right outside the window. someone either decided to make it into an impromptu javelin or swing it like a baseball bat.
i have no problems with residential safety during a year in the d.c. area, yet i have someone smash my window in burlington fucking vermont.
so now i'm pissed off and freaked out. fucking fabulous.
background ambiance - freaked-out silence
what a fucking lovely weekend.
on friday, someone said that i was working to scratch my way up the journalistic ladder so i could get to a higher paper. it didn't come off as a compliment. such a cold view of the work i'm trying to do made me feel horrible.
on saturday, my mother laughed off my talk of "when i get to boston" with a series of "uh-huh"s. and then everything else i tried to say for my entire visit seemed to be dismissed in an equally flippant manner. that made me feel even worse.
and tonight, just as i thought i couldn't feel more upset, some asshole decided to take out one of the window panes in our sunroom. it's 2:30 a.m., i'm wide awake typing and all of a sudden i hear a smash in the next room. glass made it from the window pane all the way across the sunroom and into the chair nestled in the opposite corner. a quick inspection outside (me freaking out all the while) reveals a large branch right outside the window. someone either decided to make it into an impromptu javelin or swing it like a baseball bat.
i have no problems with residential safety during a year in the d.c. area, yet i have someone smash my window in burlington fucking vermont.
so now i'm pissed off and freaked out. fucking fabulous.
9.04.2004
down with hermitage
status check - upset
background ambiance - crickets
i have to wonder why i even try this whole "interact with fellow humans" thing. it just really isn't worth it.
background ambiance - crickets
i have to wonder why i even try this whole "interact with fellow humans" thing. it just really isn't worth it.
9.03.2004
recipe for a brain frying (aka productive day)
status check - exhausted
background ambiance - daily show
take an early wake up, add copious amounts of coffee. add small children. stir and let settle for an hour or two. then add local coverage, slightly larger small children and postivity! shake vigorously. mix with not enough time and many miles. add dash of traffic and tardiness. let sit for two hours. add deadline and fatigue.
garnish as desired, serve immediately.
background ambiance - daily show
take an early wake up, add copious amounts of coffee. add small children. stir and let settle for an hour or two. then add local coverage, slightly larger small children and postivity! shake vigorously. mix with not enough time and many miles. add dash of traffic and tardiness. let sit for two hours. add deadline and fatigue.
garnish as desired, serve immediately.
9.02.2004
random incoherencies
status check - tired
background ambiance - television
when i was little, my grandmother used to tell me about how i was almost nicknamed tori. when i was born, my great-grandmother (the only great-grandparent left on either side and, to boot, one of the few grands of any form left by that point) told my mother that i was definitely a tori. it suited me, she said.
at the time, what the potential nickname suited was a squirmy mass of red face and blankets, as great-grams died when i was still in swaddling and booties. my mother was, for whatever reason, not enamored with the whole tori thing and had already decided on vickie for a nickname. v-i-c-k-i-e. so a vickie i became.
growing up, i always liked the idea of playing around with my nickname, coming up with as many variations upon the name that i could. the beginning of each new school year marked a new spelling, which always perplexed my teachers and classmates. i started school as vicky and switched the next year to vicki. i even tried vikki for a bit, but even i wasn't crazy about that one. so i'd alternate between the -ie, -y and -i until seventh grade, at which point i adopted vickie and just stuck with it. i have signatures in my various high school yearbooks in which classmates just wrote out my name any which way they possibly could - either to be on the safe side or to be appropriately wiseass.
as i approached college, i played around with the idea of going to tori route. well, it was actually prompted by my social circle at the time. they started calling me tori. i liked them, therefore i liked tori. while i introduced myself to people in school as tori, i seriously considered recreating myself as tori. new start, new nickname. so, from time to time, people would refer to me as tori and i liked it.
after the first months of school, though, the social circle fell apart (pretty much spontaneously combusted, actually) and i realized that the tori they'd refer to really wasn't the me i wanted to be. hell, they also called me "drew" (because at the time, i thought drew barrymore was an idiot and waste of oxygen), so i really should have picked up on the fact that any new nicknames from them was a bad idea. tori was too perky, overly trusting, even a bit overly dependent. tori sucked, vickie was much better. end of that saga.
last week, someone commented on my name and mentioned that she knew a victoria who went by rory. and i started to wonder if i could adapt to the name - if i didn't have the whole 23 years' worth of connections to the vickie thing. let's say i'd been called rory for as long as i could remember. or tori. or vix. whatever.
the point is, would it make a difference? would i be different than i am now? would i feel more outgoing or confident when it counts? would i even be a writer like i am now?
and would it be possible at this point to transform my name even if i wanted to?
it's another in the endless series of "what if"s - what if we hadn't moved to vermont when i was little, what if i'd gone to a different college. what if i'd gone out for college soccer instead of softball, what if i'd studied abroad and not gone the whole actf route junior year, what if i'd made a different decision about what to do after college. most of those what ifs fall on me - they were ultimately my decisions. but it's interesting to be able to pass the buck for once - to wonder about a decision made before i even knew what decisions were.
this is what happens when i SHOULD be writing in the notebook ...
background ambiance - television
when i was little, my grandmother used to tell me about how i was almost nicknamed tori. when i was born, my great-grandmother (the only great-grandparent left on either side and, to boot, one of the few grands of any form left by that point) told my mother that i was definitely a tori. it suited me, she said.
at the time, what the potential nickname suited was a squirmy mass of red face and blankets, as great-grams died when i was still in swaddling and booties. my mother was, for whatever reason, not enamored with the whole tori thing and had already decided on vickie for a nickname. v-i-c-k-i-e. so a vickie i became.
growing up, i always liked the idea of playing around with my nickname, coming up with as many variations upon the name that i could. the beginning of each new school year marked a new spelling, which always perplexed my teachers and classmates. i started school as vicky and switched the next year to vicki. i even tried vikki for a bit, but even i wasn't crazy about that one. so i'd alternate between the -ie, -y and -i until seventh grade, at which point i adopted vickie and just stuck with it. i have signatures in my various high school yearbooks in which classmates just wrote out my name any which way they possibly could - either to be on the safe side or to be appropriately wiseass.
as i approached college, i played around with the idea of going to tori route. well, it was actually prompted by my social circle at the time. they started calling me tori. i liked them, therefore i liked tori. while i introduced myself to people in school as tori, i seriously considered recreating myself as tori. new start, new nickname. so, from time to time, people would refer to me as tori and i liked it.
after the first months of school, though, the social circle fell apart (pretty much spontaneously combusted, actually) and i realized that the tori they'd refer to really wasn't the me i wanted to be. hell, they also called me "drew" (because at the time, i thought drew barrymore was an idiot and waste of oxygen), so i really should have picked up on the fact that any new nicknames from them was a bad idea. tori was too perky, overly trusting, even a bit overly dependent. tori sucked, vickie was much better. end of that saga.
last week, someone commented on my name and mentioned that she knew a victoria who went by rory. and i started to wonder if i could adapt to the name - if i didn't have the whole 23 years' worth of connections to the vickie thing. let's say i'd been called rory for as long as i could remember. or tori. or vix. whatever.
the point is, would it make a difference? would i be different than i am now? would i feel more outgoing or confident when it counts? would i even be a writer like i am now?
and would it be possible at this point to transform my name even if i wanted to?
it's another in the endless series of "what if"s - what if we hadn't moved to vermont when i was little, what if i'd gone to a different college. what if i'd gone out for college soccer instead of softball, what if i'd studied abroad and not gone the whole actf route junior year, what if i'd made a different decision about what to do after college. most of those what ifs fall on me - they were ultimately my decisions. but it's interesting to be able to pass the buck for once - to wonder about a decision made before i even knew what decisions were.
this is what happens when i SHOULD be writing in the notebook ...
9.01.2004
thanks, NESN
status check - amused
background ambiance - red sox game
bolting to the television during the seventh inning stretch to try to see all of the averi guys perform: blush from laughing coworkers.
seeing the bottom of michael's "3 1/2" shirt and a bit of stu (or was it chris? or matt? funny, i coudn't tell) and realizing they're standing on the grounds of fenway park: pretty damn cool.
i was excited to see the band (kind of) on television. much like i was excited to see mayer perform at the grammys and win shortly thereafter.
know what i mean?
in other news. want to write some more pages tonight. can't. why? i have to go to the first day of school tomorrow. funny, i thought i went to college and worked hard for four years so i never had to go to a first day again. hmm.
background ambiance - red sox game
bolting to the television during the seventh inning stretch to try to see all of the averi guys perform: blush from laughing coworkers.
seeing the bottom of michael's "3 1/2" shirt and a bit of stu (or was it chris? or matt? funny, i coudn't tell) and realizing they're standing on the grounds of fenway park: pretty damn cool.
i was excited to see the band (kind of) on television. much like i was excited to see mayer perform at the grammys and win shortly thereafter.
know what i mean?
in other news. want to write some more pages tonight. can't. why? i have to go to the first day of school tomorrow. funny, i thought i went to college and worked hard for four years so i never had to go to a first day again. hmm.
lalala
status check - delightful
background ambiance - television (i love jon stewart)
i'm not going to get a decent night's sleep until this thing's finished.
background ambiance - television (i love jon stewart)
i'm not going to get a decent night's sleep until this thing's finished.
8.31.2004
bma time
status check - pleased
background ambiance - silence
BMA votes are being accepted. among the worthy acts nominated: guster, howie day, josh ritter. bleu and ryan montbleau, dar williams and catie curtis ...
background ambiance - silence
BMA votes are being accepted. among the worthy acts nominated: guster, howie day, josh ritter. bleu and ryan montbleau, dar williams and catie curtis ...
because i've got it on the brain
status check - fabulous
background ambiance - rain
it's maddening, but wonderful.
leaning intently over an empty page, scribbling down something without even thinking about it, then turning to the next blank page to start anew ...
... the next moment, you look up and realize you've raced through two hours and you have page upon page of that which you refuse to look upon as you go to sleep. you're locked into the story and you just need to rest your mind until you can pick up the pen and start again ...
... but you place the notebook by your bedstand with the thought that perhaps something particularly extraordinary will come to you in your dreams.
these are the late night hours that i enjoy. other people be damned. all i need right now is my paper, pen and mind.
background ambiance - rain
it's maddening, but wonderful.
leaning intently over an empty page, scribbling down something without even thinking about it, then turning to the next blank page to start anew ...
... the next moment, you look up and realize you've raced through two hours and you have page upon page of that which you refuse to look upon as you go to sleep. you're locked into the story and you just need to rest your mind until you can pick up the pen and start again ...
... but you place the notebook by your bedstand with the thought that perhaps something particularly extraordinary will come to you in your dreams.
these are the late night hours that i enjoy. other people be damned. all i need right now is my paper, pen and mind.
8.30.2004
writing the passingly decent american novel
status check - drained
background ambiance - typical monday sounds
And indeed there will be time
For the yellow smoke that slides along the street,
Rubbing its back upon the window-panes;
There will be time, there will be time
To prepare a face to meet the faces that you meet;
There will be time to murder and create,
And time for all the works and days of hands
That lift and drop a question on your plate;
Time for you and time for me,
And time yet for a hundred indecisions,
And for a hundred visions and revisions,
Before the taking of a toast and tea.
- t.s. eliot
it's interesting to see how the pursuit for inspiration strikes. after some of last night's revisions to the notebook intended to make the story flow more smoothly (which i believe it will), i went to see "garden state" for the second time. i remembered feeling such a rush of desire to create (write! compose! even just plain scribble madly!) the first time.
i enjoyed the film just as much, if not more, the second time around. but when i got home, i felt so defeated, convinced that there was no way i would ever be able to create something that fascinates others as much as the movie fascinates me.
after struggling over a few pages' worth of new writing, i put it aside. i plan to resume tonight - this time, just to write something i would enjoy reading. i won't go through my characteristic process of revising that which isn't yet complete - i'll just pound out the ideas and the plot that has begun to flow through my mind. it may be complete drivel, but it will be a completed version of complete drivel and i'll have something to work with.
i want to have the first draft finished by the end of september. by the time i ring in my twenty-fourth year in november, i want to have something edited and ready to at least show others. no more slacking. the story is in my mind, along with the initial characters are there - i just need to be in tune with it and put it all onto the page. and have fun with it.
background ambiance - typical monday sounds
And indeed there will be time
For the yellow smoke that slides along the street,
Rubbing its back upon the window-panes;
There will be time, there will be time
To prepare a face to meet the faces that you meet;
There will be time to murder and create,
And time for all the works and days of hands
That lift and drop a question on your plate;
Time for you and time for me,
And time yet for a hundred indecisions,
And for a hundred visions and revisions,
Before the taking of a toast and tea.
- t.s. eliot
it's interesting to see how the pursuit for inspiration strikes. after some of last night's revisions to the notebook intended to make the story flow more smoothly (which i believe it will), i went to see "garden state" for the second time. i remembered feeling such a rush of desire to create (write! compose! even just plain scribble madly!) the first time.
i enjoyed the film just as much, if not more, the second time around. but when i got home, i felt so defeated, convinced that there was no way i would ever be able to create something that fascinates others as much as the movie fascinates me.
after struggling over a few pages' worth of new writing, i put it aside. i plan to resume tonight - this time, just to write something i would enjoy reading. i won't go through my characteristic process of revising that which isn't yet complete - i'll just pound out the ideas and the plot that has begun to flow through my mind. it may be complete drivel, but it will be a completed version of complete drivel and i'll have something to work with.
i want to have the first draft finished by the end of september. by the time i ring in my twenty-fourth year in november, i want to have something edited and ready to at least show others. no more slacking. the story is in my mind, along with the initial characters are there - i just need to be in tune with it and put it all onto the page. and have fun with it.
8.29.2004
playing around
status check - creative
background ambiance - olympic closing ceremonies
... This is summer's last stand.
The constant breeze, rustling tree branches and curtains, does little to break the thickly unsettling haze that covers the city. Like thousands o its other uncomfortable residents, I have sprawled out on the couch, directly in front of the an and within arm's reach of a tall bottle of cold water.
My computer sits on the desk, waiting for me to pound out my latest review, but I can't bear to peel off of my resting place. The computer is hot. My desk chair is hot. My mind is melting.
In truth, I'm not in the proper frame of mind to write the review. I was at Jig's last night, where I listened to Tremors, the newest Hot Band to generate any buzz.
Those in the local circles made the funk-fused threepiece sound like the latest Dispatch, but I hadn't seen it. The harmonies were too overpowering, rhythm too unsteady and the lead guitarist had enjoyed too many Jaegar shots before taking the stage.
It won't be a favorable review anyway, but any draft written now would include barbs prompted more by this heat than the band's performance. The HBO gods are giving me an excuse to research instead - "High Fidelity" has just started. I can feel productive without even making my way across the living room to pull the much-loved DVD copy off the shelf. I can just lay here, speaking all the parts while John Cusack's character discusses the importance of Championship Vinyl ...
background ambiance - olympic closing ceremonies
... This is summer's last stand.
The constant breeze, rustling tree branches and curtains, does little to break the thickly unsettling haze that covers the city. Like thousands o its other uncomfortable residents, I have sprawled out on the couch, directly in front of the an and within arm's reach of a tall bottle of cold water.
My computer sits on the desk, waiting for me to pound out my latest review, but I can't bear to peel off of my resting place. The computer is hot. My desk chair is hot. My mind is melting.
In truth, I'm not in the proper frame of mind to write the review. I was at Jig's last night, where I listened to Tremors, the newest Hot Band to generate any buzz.
Those in the local circles made the funk-fused threepiece sound like the latest Dispatch, but I hadn't seen it. The harmonies were too overpowering, rhythm too unsteady and the lead guitarist had enjoyed too many Jaegar shots before taking the stage.
It won't be a favorable review anyway, but any draft written now would include barbs prompted more by this heat than the band's performance. The HBO gods are giving me an excuse to research instead - "High Fidelity" has just started. I can feel productive without even making my way across the living room to pull the much-loved DVD copy off the shelf. I can just lay here, speaking all the parts while John Cusack's character discusses the importance of Championship Vinyl ...
dog days
status check - hot
background ambiance - indoor fan
it feels like summer's last stand.
while we all prepare to welcome in september and the accompanying long-sleeves, sweaters and the like, the summer is defying our expectations and reminding us that august requires the shorts, tank tops, glasses of cold water and fans.
the sun is shining, tempting me to go outside and explore, but i'm instead waiting until the heat breaks later this afternoon before wandering life outside the apartment. i intend to return to the fairy-tale-reminiscent old red mill, but i know that doing so now would leave me uncomfortably sticky and light-headed by the time i get there.
instead, i write - both here and in the novel notebook.
and remain amazed that the most gripping events of this olympiad have been, in fact, the marathons. the crazy men ran today amid international fans, greek patriots and the one insane man who possibly ruined lima's gold-medal pace by pushing the brazillian man off the course and into the crowds. lima finished third - i think he could have won it.
last night, i sat on the back porch steps and felt the humid breeze try to cool me. the wind was restless, as if waiting for a shower to break the silence. i felt equally impatient - as i feel as if something is about to happen. i'm going to have some form of a breakthrough shortly - but i have no idea of what it is and precisely when it will happen. i can just tell that some type of change is imminent.
i'm excited about it, but equally nervous. i don't know what's about to occur, nor how i will turn out at the end. i have to hope i'm prepared for it. but i feel like i am.
now i just have to keep on keeping on until the situation actually presents itself to me.
background ambiance - indoor fan
it feels like summer's last stand.
while we all prepare to welcome in september and the accompanying long-sleeves, sweaters and the like, the summer is defying our expectations and reminding us that august requires the shorts, tank tops, glasses of cold water and fans.
the sun is shining, tempting me to go outside and explore, but i'm instead waiting until the heat breaks later this afternoon before wandering life outside the apartment. i intend to return to the fairy-tale-reminiscent old red mill, but i know that doing so now would leave me uncomfortably sticky and light-headed by the time i get there.
instead, i write - both here and in the novel notebook.
and remain amazed that the most gripping events of this olympiad have been, in fact, the marathons. the crazy men ran today amid international fans, greek patriots and the one insane man who possibly ruined lima's gold-medal pace by pushing the brazillian man off the course and into the crowds. lima finished third - i think he could have won it.
last night, i sat on the back porch steps and felt the humid breeze try to cool me. the wind was restless, as if waiting for a shower to break the silence. i felt equally impatient - as i feel as if something is about to happen. i'm going to have some form of a breakthrough shortly - but i have no idea of what it is and precisely when it will happen. i can just tell that some type of change is imminent.
i'm excited about it, but equally nervous. i don't know what's about to occur, nor how i will turn out at the end. i have to hope i'm prepared for it. but i feel like i am.
now i just have to keep on keeping on until the situation actually presents itself to me.
8.27.2004
shift switch
status check - contemplative
background ambiance - quiet, at the moment
i had a post here talking about the past - spurred mostly by the fact that the college kids are back in town and the realization (courtesy of my flatmate) that it'll be six years tomorrow since i first arrived in this town as a college freshman orientating myself with campus.
i spend too much time thinking about the past. during my days, i wind up thinking back on a regular basis, while i've spent my insomnia-prompted nights focusing on the future.
i need to reverse this pattern. remember the nights in my dream state, focus on the future while i'm conscious.
whenever i get like this (i.e. not able to sleep when other, reasonable folks are enjoying their REM cycles), i wish there was someone else around, or at least reachable via some form of communication, with whom i can discuss these random thoughts running through my mind. i remember the things i'd like to share, but i recall them when there's no one else around to enjoy them.
for instance, last night (well, early this morning) i dreamt that i was helping guster with the cover art for their new album (i have no idea of why i was thinking of guster, but i'm assuming the new album bit was because of my recent frequent music purchases). i was shown a mock-up of it, featuring a large slice of olive green pie. when i commented that i didn't think it looked quite right, whoever was holding the mockup reached into it, pulled out the piece of 3-D pie and asked me to adjust it accordingly. we then searched for large, vegas-style lettering and a thousand paper airplanes to throw. the airplanes would be seen in the distance, as would the lettering. but the wind gust that carried the planes knocked over the letters, sending sparks everywhere for a big old mess.
i don't know why i was thinking guster, pie or vegas, but the dream was there, ridiculously vividly. and i'm not sure why i'm thinking of it again or describing it now.
i need to look to the future - or do something new for my present. i want a new hobby. i want to travel somewhere new. i want to write a chapter of my novel, but the characters haven't given me the next pieces of the puzzle yet. i want to meet someone new and find out what makes them tick. i want to catch up with someone i haven't seen in years. i want to go off to find some adventure or realize an adventure has found me. and i want to go to sleep realizing that something exciting is right around the bend, waiting for me to approach.
i'm happy right now - very happy, actually. i'm doing some form of what i want to spend my life doing, i've got friends who love me as much as i love them. i have a happy little place that i call my home with two fantastic people crazy enough to live with me. but i get wanderlusty and find myself wondering what else is going to come up - and get impatient, wondering when it'll get here or when i'll get to it.
i wind up feeling envious of the people i read about in various forums, people off in other parts of the country - sometimes the world - doing all these things that seem romatically fascinating from my little space. i'm acutely aware of the fact that these other adventures come with their share of problems and stress. i know it's never as exciting as it looks. and i'm realize that the number of people who do such amazing things are extremely small - that they're a special bunch. but i'm not ordinary - i'm special too. is it just that i'm more typical than i think, or is it that i missed a turn somewhere? and which realization would be more devastating?
why can't i just be perpetually satisfied with what i have? why i can't i make things easier that way? am i even supposed to?
much as it has always been a comfort to be able to spout such gibberish to myself, for whatever reason, i feel this need tonight to connect with someone else.
background ambiance - quiet, at the moment
i had a post here talking about the past - spurred mostly by the fact that the college kids are back in town and the realization (courtesy of my flatmate) that it'll be six years tomorrow since i first arrived in this town as a college freshman orientating myself with campus.
i spend too much time thinking about the past. during my days, i wind up thinking back on a regular basis, while i've spent my insomnia-prompted nights focusing on the future.
i need to reverse this pattern. remember the nights in my dream state, focus on the future while i'm conscious.
whenever i get like this (i.e. not able to sleep when other, reasonable folks are enjoying their REM cycles), i wish there was someone else around, or at least reachable via some form of communication, with whom i can discuss these random thoughts running through my mind. i remember the things i'd like to share, but i recall them when there's no one else around to enjoy them.
for instance, last night (well, early this morning) i dreamt that i was helping guster with the cover art for their new album (i have no idea of why i was thinking of guster, but i'm assuming the new album bit was because of my recent frequent music purchases). i was shown a mock-up of it, featuring a large slice of olive green pie. when i commented that i didn't think it looked quite right, whoever was holding the mockup reached into it, pulled out the piece of 3-D pie and asked me to adjust it accordingly. we then searched for large, vegas-style lettering and a thousand paper airplanes to throw. the airplanes would be seen in the distance, as would the lettering. but the wind gust that carried the planes knocked over the letters, sending sparks everywhere for a big old mess.
i don't know why i was thinking guster, pie or vegas, but the dream was there, ridiculously vividly. and i'm not sure why i'm thinking of it again or describing it now.
i need to look to the future - or do something new for my present. i want a new hobby. i want to travel somewhere new. i want to write a chapter of my novel, but the characters haven't given me the next pieces of the puzzle yet. i want to meet someone new and find out what makes them tick. i want to catch up with someone i haven't seen in years. i want to go off to find some adventure or realize an adventure has found me. and i want to go to sleep realizing that something exciting is right around the bend, waiting for me to approach.
i'm happy right now - very happy, actually. i'm doing some form of what i want to spend my life doing, i've got friends who love me as much as i love them. i have a happy little place that i call my home with two fantastic people crazy enough to live with me. but i get wanderlusty and find myself wondering what else is going to come up - and get impatient, wondering when it'll get here or when i'll get to it.
i wind up feeling envious of the people i read about in various forums, people off in other parts of the country - sometimes the world - doing all these things that seem romatically fascinating from my little space. i'm acutely aware of the fact that these other adventures come with their share of problems and stress. i know it's never as exciting as it looks. and i'm realize that the number of people who do such amazing things are extremely small - that they're a special bunch. but i'm not ordinary - i'm special too. is it just that i'm more typical than i think, or is it that i missed a turn somewhere? and which realization would be more devastating?
why can't i just be perpetually satisfied with what i have? why i can't i make things easier that way? am i even supposed to?
much as it has always been a comfort to be able to spout such gibberish to myself, for whatever reason, i feel this need tonight to connect with someone else.
8.26.2004
public service announcement
status check - lovely
background ambiance - gregory page - bon voyage mon cheri
if you haven't heard gregory page's "bon voyage mon cheri," go here. now. do not delay. stop waiting, just do it! he never ceases to amaze me.
background ambiance - gregory page - bon voyage mon cheri
if you haven't heard gregory page's "bon voyage mon cheri," go here. now. do not delay. stop waiting, just do it! he never ceases to amaze me.
8.25.2004
chris m and me
status check - amused
background ambiance - coldplay
per usual, my office nextdoor neighbor, red square, has been blaring the music all night, providing background music for the end of my day. while i've spent most of the evening bobbing in time to the live jazz, the musicians have taken a break and the dj has taken over. he's pumping "politik" through the speakers so loudly that i smile as i imagine coldplay performing right outside my office window.
background ambiance - coldplay
per usual, my office nextdoor neighbor, red square, has been blaring the music all night, providing background music for the end of my day. while i've spent most of the evening bobbing in time to the live jazz, the musicians have taken a break and the dj has taken over. he's pumping "politik" through the speakers so loudly that i smile as i imagine coldplay performing right outside my office window.
they weren't kiddin' ...
status check - decent
background ambiance - typical wednesday evening
wow, that whole opposable thumbs thing really is quite remarkable. you realize just how remarkable it is when you also realize you have annoyingly limited use of the thumbs - or, at least, one of them.
i pulled a classic stupid victoria move early this afternoon, walking up church street to meet with one of my flatmates for lunch. it seemed simple enough at the time - reach into the bag, pull out the wallet, be ready to go.
but upon reaching, my hand found not the wallet, but an unclasped pin waiting to strike my poor, innocent funny fifth finger.
slice! i quickly pull my hand out and discover a nice gash on the left side of my right thumb. without immediate access to a bandaid, i'm forced to make due with an always-stunning temporary napkin bandage. i walk up church street, trying to downplay the fact that my thumb is bleeding, i feel like a tool and i know the flatmate waiting for me is going to good-naturedly laugh at my situation. i'd do the same - after making sure she was ok, that is. fortunately, she made sure i was alright before starting to chuckle at both my expense and the self-depricating humor i unleashed.
i figured the worst of the situation had already passed, but then i got to work - and promptly realized the truly annoying nature of this injury. as one of those writerly types, i use my fingers all day long. come up with the story in my head, get it onto a screen with the fingers on the keyboard keys.
the pin's decision to strike the thumb proved particularly vicious. i've always prided myself on my ability to type - i'm pretty accurate with my keystrokes and i'm a fast typist.
since i don't get the opportunity to spend much time using ornate words in my journalista work, probably the most frequently used key is the spacebar - the key i normally hit with my right thumb. bam! the left side of the right thumb hits the bar and i'm onto the next short word. bam! hit space again. right where i cut myself a few hours before.
so there's this annoying delayed reaction to my writing today. i'm wincing whenever i hit the spacebar, which means i'm wincing about once every second and a half. because i'm cool like that.
the only other time i can recall being this cool was junior year of high school during softball season. we were gearing up to play one of our local quasi-rivals and i was scheduled to start on the mound (yep, in high school and my one disasterous season of college softball, i was a pitcher). that day, i managed to cut my right-hand middle finger on an exacto knife in biology class. which meant i couldn't pitch - as it's pretty tricky for a pitcher to grip a softball with a big bandaid on a key pitching finger. so instead i played first base, talking with the opposing baserunners as they stood on first.
"hey, weren't you supposed to pitch today?"
"yeah."
"why aren't you?"
"uh, cut my finger."
the cut finger - the ultimate badass injury. and i'm feeling just as badass now.
background ambiance - typical wednesday evening
wow, that whole opposable thumbs thing really is quite remarkable. you realize just how remarkable it is when you also realize you have annoyingly limited use of the thumbs - or, at least, one of them.
i pulled a classic stupid victoria move early this afternoon, walking up church street to meet with one of my flatmates for lunch. it seemed simple enough at the time - reach into the bag, pull out the wallet, be ready to go.
but upon reaching, my hand found not the wallet, but an unclasped pin waiting to strike my poor, innocent funny fifth finger.
slice! i quickly pull my hand out and discover a nice gash on the left side of my right thumb. without immediate access to a bandaid, i'm forced to make due with an always-stunning temporary napkin bandage. i walk up church street, trying to downplay the fact that my thumb is bleeding, i feel like a tool and i know the flatmate waiting for me is going to good-naturedly laugh at my situation. i'd do the same - after making sure she was ok, that is. fortunately, she made sure i was alright before starting to chuckle at both my expense and the self-depricating humor i unleashed.
i figured the worst of the situation had already passed, but then i got to work - and promptly realized the truly annoying nature of this injury. as one of those writerly types, i use my fingers all day long. come up with the story in my head, get it onto a screen with the fingers on the keyboard keys.
the pin's decision to strike the thumb proved particularly vicious. i've always prided myself on my ability to type - i'm pretty accurate with my keystrokes and i'm a fast typist.
since i don't get the opportunity to spend much time using ornate words in my journalista work, probably the most frequently used key is the spacebar - the key i normally hit with my right thumb. bam! the left side of the right thumb hits the bar and i'm onto the next short word. bam! hit space again. right where i cut myself a few hours before.
so there's this annoying delayed reaction to my writing today. i'm wincing whenever i hit the spacebar, which means i'm wincing about once every second and a half. because i'm cool like that.
the only other time i can recall being this cool was junior year of high school during softball season. we were gearing up to play one of our local quasi-rivals and i was scheduled to start on the mound (yep, in high school and my one disasterous season of college softball, i was a pitcher). that day, i managed to cut my right-hand middle finger on an exacto knife in biology class. which meant i couldn't pitch - as it's pretty tricky for a pitcher to grip a softball with a big bandaid on a key pitching finger. so instead i played first base, talking with the opposing baserunners as they stood on first.
"hey, weren't you supposed to pitch today?"
"yeah."
"why aren't you?"
"uh, cut my finger."
the cut finger - the ultimate badass injury. and i'm feeling just as badass now.
8.24.2004
(pause)
status check - peachy keen
background ambiance - same old, same old
we interrupt this afternoon of combing through a story looking for the tiniest of unpleasent stylistic quirks to make a series of random, somewhat quirky self-serving observations.
- august is already hinting at the fall to come, with crisp sweatshirt-necessary mornings and nights. soon i'll be back in my favorite season, clad in courdoroys, tweed (we like) and sweaters. i'm preparing to bid adieu to sleeveless anything for months upon end ... but thoroughly befuddled about where summer went.
- i love making stops at my semi-regular online reading spots and realizing that the writers i follow and enjoy are as infatuated by certain newish releases as i am. it almost feels as if we're this collective creative coallition, bobbing our heads to the same soundtrack while we scribble pages and screens of our respective rambles.
- i fear my insomnia has returned. i picked up on this at about 5:30 a.m., as i continued to stare at my bedroom wall ...
- i'm digging the new mraz funk stylings. and i'm surprised that i am.
- starting tomorrow, i'm waking in the mornings, starting off the day with a jog (or something equally athletic) and then enjoying some coffee. i'm doing this morning thing again - and i'm doing it right.
- speaking of coffee, i'm craving it now. will wait - a bit, anyway.
- when i finish my novel, i'm going to reward myself with a vacation of some west-coast form.
background ambiance - same old, same old
we interrupt this afternoon of combing through a story looking for the tiniest of unpleasent stylistic quirks to make a series of random, somewhat quirky self-serving observations.
- august is already hinting at the fall to come, with crisp sweatshirt-necessary mornings and nights. soon i'll be back in my favorite season, clad in courdoroys, tweed (we like) and sweaters. i'm preparing to bid adieu to sleeveless anything for months upon end ... but thoroughly befuddled about where summer went.
- i love making stops at my semi-regular online reading spots and realizing that the writers i follow and enjoy are as infatuated by certain newish releases as i am. it almost feels as if we're this collective creative coallition, bobbing our heads to the same soundtrack while we scribble pages and screens of our respective rambles.
- i fear my insomnia has returned. i picked up on this at about 5:30 a.m., as i continued to stare at my bedroom wall ...
- i'm digging the new mraz funk stylings. and i'm surprised that i am.
- starting tomorrow, i'm waking in the mornings, starting off the day with a jog (or something equally athletic) and then enjoying some coffee. i'm doing this morning thing again - and i'm doing it right.
- speaking of coffee, i'm craving it now. will wait - a bit, anyway.
- when i finish my novel, i'm going to reward myself with a vacation of some west-coast form.
8.22.2004
sprint, bitch, sprint!
status check - fabulous
background ambiance - silence
i never realized the potential possessed by marathons until i was on the edge of my couch this afternoon cheering on the women olympic marathoners. what a race! sure the first 20-odd miles are rather slow going, but then, wow. you have marathoners struggling against their bodies and minds to finish, you have americans charging up from behind to take the bronze, you have drama, humidity and strategy - we were all honestly gripped by the last half hour or so. they should market this. "marathon - kind of slow start, but golly! what a finish"
svetlana, so sorry about the bars. it's this karma thing, see?
one chapter written and i've been laughing while writing. knock on wood.
i will wake up earlier this week. i swear.
background ambiance - silence
i never realized the potential possessed by marathons until i was on the edge of my couch this afternoon cheering on the women olympic marathoners. what a race! sure the first 20-odd miles are rather slow going, but then, wow. you have marathoners struggling against their bodies and minds to finish, you have americans charging up from behind to take the bronze, you have drama, humidity and strategy - we were all honestly gripped by the last half hour or so. they should market this. "marathon - kind of slow start, but golly! what a finish"
svetlana, so sorry about the bars. it's this karma thing, see?
one chapter written and i've been laughing while writing. knock on wood.
i will wake up earlier this week. i swear.
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