writing the passingly decent american novel

status check - drained
background ambiance - typical monday sounds

And indeed there will be time
For the yellow smoke that slides along the street,
Rubbing its back upon the window-panes;
There will be time, there will be time
To prepare a face to meet the faces that you meet;
There will be time to murder and create,
And time for all the works and days of hands
That lift and drop a question on your plate;
Time for you and time for me,
And time yet for a hundred indecisions,
And for a hundred visions and revisions,
Before the taking of a toast and tea.
- t.s. eliot

it's interesting to see how the pursuit for inspiration strikes. after some of last night's revisions to the notebook intended to make the story flow more smoothly (which i believe it will), i went to see "garden state" for the second time. i remembered feeling such a rush of desire to create (write! compose! even just plain scribble madly!) the first time.

i enjoyed the film just as much, if not more, the second time around. but when i got home, i felt so defeated, convinced that there was no way i would ever be able to create something that fascinates others as much as the movie fascinates me.

after struggling over a few pages' worth of new writing, i put it aside. i plan to resume tonight - this time, just to write something i would enjoy reading. i won't go through my characteristic process of revising that which isn't yet complete - i'll just pound out the ideas and the plot that has begun to flow through my mind. it may be complete drivel, but it will be a completed version of complete drivel and i'll have something to work with.

i want to have the first draft finished by the end of september. by the time i ring in my twenty-fourth year in november, i want to have something edited and ready to at least show others. no more slacking. the story is in my mind, along with the initial characters are there - i just need to be in tune with it and put it all onto the page. and have fun with it.