total corruption of the mind

i used to be a nice girl, without any of the warped, evil thoughts i had battered into my brain by evil influences.

ok, i can't even type that without laughing.

anyway, i've found today has held many opportunities to foray into the thoughts and ideas that have paved my way to hell. it's been long determined that i'm already hell-bound - in fact, i'll be driving the shuttle bus between here and eternal damnation. it's all good, though - i've already got a navigator lined up for the job - it'll be a hell of a lot of fun for the rest of all time.

but today has shown just why this is my destined fate. it began while i was in the chapel. the chapel has always held amusing significance for me, as a much younger, more naive version of my freshman self walked by the chapel with a younger version of elizabeth, talking about how amusing it would be to sing "du hast" inside (i should interrupt this post to state that i am nothing but respectful of people's views on religion. i just happen to be questioning and, therefore, often sarcastic. no hate mail/comments please). flash forward to senior year, when beth and i had become friends again and wound up quietly, respectfully singing in the empty chapel one night. it was one of several instances in which we found ways to blaspheme in the chapel. we also found times to tease a devoutely religious friend about the sexual manner in which numerous biblical references could be taken and we did determine that a certain biblical statue in the chapel was demonstrating some utterly un-holy behavior.

anyway. so i'm in the chapel and i feel i have to, for beth, recognize aforementioned statue. so, upon talking to my partner in crime this evening, i inform her of this. she laughs and informs me that, while in her hometown church recently, she found herself looking at the paintings because she realizes the un-holy behavior (known as J.E.) may not be isolated to the statue in the sm chapel. sure enough, a painting seems to depict the same behavior. and she was all excited to tell me.

after laughing about this, i'm still talking to her, but am also looking through some of my old files on my laptop, coming across a weird-al-like take on "you & i both" that i had written right before falling asleep one night months ago. i had watched something ... i don't even recall what, but it featured numerous, numerous marijuana references. so as i'm falling asleep, listening to music, "you & i both" comes on and i all of a sudden have this new song floating through my half-conscious mind. i had to wake up and write it down. while beth (who i shared the song with the next day) and i have been singing these words anytime we hear the song on the radio, on mtv or, in my case, when i'm listening to cds, i hadn't actually read the lyrics in ages ... and i just started laughing. i'd post them, but it's ridiculously embarrassing ... i don't know, perhaps i will. but at the same point, i don't want to seem disrespectful, as i actually love the original song ... hey, weird al always talks about how parody is a form of respect, right?

but it contends with "look at me, i'm adam c" as my favorite parody thus far. teehee.

randomness as i start to nod off for the night ... i'll be drifting to sleep with a smile on my face, having enjoyed smiles, friends and "hey ya" during the sunshine. i'll also probably be listening to two of my new favorite songs - "great life's work" and "strange." i need to buy tickets for friday's concert. i found out that the concert saturday night will be at a divey former strip club - apparently the poles are still there. that could make for fun. ten years ago, i never would have believed i'd buy an issue of rolling stone with my former governor on the cover. i can't think of a single democratic candidate i'd enthusiastically vote for. i think i'll vote for john cusack. i want to find a new book to read (any suggestions?). i want to finally buy a white stripes album. i can't wait to stretch out on my couch tomorrow. i hope i can get my article done. for some reason, i feel extremely optimistic tonight. i hope it continues tomorrow. i'm going to visit california by the end of the summer at the latest - i'm setting something up for a reunion of sorts at that point. a random comment made me wonder about my destiny. i want to visit california before the end of the summer. i need to get to d.c. in the coming months. i can't wait for good concerts. i can't wait for good times. i can't wait for spring.

something good's coming up. don't know what it is, but i'm ready for it.

.....................................................zzz.............................................................