... if only i knew then what i know now ...

... i sure as hell would have stayed. no matter what.

from one year ago today ...

1.8.03 - what follows is my mraz tale of woe...
so i finish up my night at work, change into proper concert gear and head out to arlington so i can find iota and be there nice and early so i'm sure to get in. after arriving, i order a drink and follow that up with some dinner (a gardenburger with fries, for those who were dying to know--may i note that it was an exceptionally tasty meal) and prepare to wait a couple of hours until showtime.

when i walked in, i immediately recognized toca from the cbs morning show, but didn't see mraz right away. eventually, however, i saw him and realized that he's just as attractive as everyone says. i was prepared for a fun evening of music and, if i felt gutsy enough, conversation with him. or at least the chance to hear him play and then buy one of the live cds i've been wanting.

after eating dinner and realizing i had about an hour and a half to kill, however, it hits me. all of the people, the smoke, the music (cd music over the pa, the quasi-soundcheck mraz and the guys were doing, plus some guy playing guitar in the corner)--all of the stuff i normally love about shows--it hits me like a ton of bricks and i realize that 1) i feel incredibly sick, to the point of wanting to faint or throw up and 2) there's no way i'm going to make it until they start to take money for tickets, let alone make it through the whole show. since i'd already traveled out to arlington and had eaten dinner there and everything, this was the most wretched of realizations and i fought my quickly fading body and tried to stick it out. i walked around the little club area, searching for a spare seat where i could curl up for a bit--anything. but there was nothing for me to do except stand there and try to not fall over or leave. i tried the standing bit for about five minutes before finally accepting that i was going to lose that little game (and, while i wanted to make an impression on mraz, i didn't want it to be "hey, that's the girl who passed out at my virginia show!"), so i was sensible and left.

i didn't want to, i was cursing myself during my entire walk back to the metro, trying to psych myself up to turn back and go back in. but i was so dizzy and felt so nauseous that i knew going home was the right thing. knowing it was the right thing, however, didn't make it suck any less. and, adding insult to injury, i wasn't able to get one of the live cds because they didn't have the merch table set up when i was getting ready to leave. so i'll have to order it online, i suppose.

i think it was a combination of factors that led to my feeling so ill--but the biggest thing was that it was yet another example of how the day after the day after a very long day sucks. sunday was a ridiculously long day, with waking up at 4:30 a.m. to get to the airport and then getting back down here, and i was wired on monday, but i was dead to the world while at work yesterday. this was perpetuated by being at the club and having everything going on around me.

but it wasn't a total loss. i got to see mraz, techically. i even got to hear him during soundcheck. i know where iota is, so going there for future shows won't be a problem. and i had a tasty dinner. i was right in leaving, and i feel ok today, although i think i still need to get another good night's sleep because i'm a little tired today.

but i'm still pretty disappointed about how it panned out.

and, with that, the string of vickie-less mraz shows begins. but, in good news, thanks to that misadventure and my resultant posting on rkop, i had the opportunity to interact with a certain fellow mraz fan ...

... so it turned out to be a good thing all in all. :)

but i'll say that i was listening to my copy of the show today and i'm still bitter to have missed it.

bollocks.