YIR

status check - a little tired
background ambiance - typical

year in review, compiled during the last tuesday of 2004.

most memorable experience i can't really remember: graham colton's headlining set at metronome, may 10. averi opened, with dennis replacing the out-of-commission michael. it gets fuzzy (hilariously so) once beth and i went to the bar, ordered a round of kamakazi shots and started talking to dennis.

surreal moment 1: on oct. 27, i watched the red sox win the world series in a dining hall at the university of vermont. i was one of three reporters covering burlington's reaction if the sox pulled off the sweep. when foulke recorded the second strike of the final out, each of the 20-odd people in the room groaned - it was so close but we couldn't quite believe they'd pull it off. after the toss to first base, everyone screamed and hugged - i watched the team rush the field and then bolted out the door for the victory celebration on the green. "dirty water" was piped into the night from a dorm window, revelers swarmed the green among the cops in riot gear. twice as many people stood pressed against every window, curious as to what would unfold but afraid to come out. it didn't start to dawn on me that they actually WON until much later that night, but i was able to call my dad and yell, "how 'bout dem red sox?" and hear him cheer.

surreal moment 2: hopping into my car at midnight with my father to drive from burlington to beverly on oct. 30. we arrived at my grandmother's around 4, i tossed and turned until 5:30 - we were at the train station among other baseball fans around 6:30. we stormed the trains and met up with my brother in front of the museum of science, where we stood for several hours on the curb until the duck boat rolling rally approached. any fatigue was forgotten when the motorcade of area police officers approached with flashing lights; the confetti bursts cleared just in time to see johnny damon sticking his head out of the front of the first boat with a grin, wave and flash of the victory sign. the photos taken that day remain among my favorite taken in 2004; i didn't process what i'd seen until the photos came back.*

it had finally sunk in: on dec. 2, bronson arroyo (the one red sox autographed i'd actually sought in 2004) brought the trophy to NoVo. after standing in the snow with beth and chuck for three feet-numbing hours, we enjoyed being there, but acknowledged that the disbelief had dissipated at some point during the stretch of november. but it was still neat to see.

loyal to a fault: the living room, middle earth music hall (2), nectar's, paradise, metronome, the roxy, avalon, pickel barrel. nine averi shows and two vows "never to let myself be disappointed by a performance again." "for better or worse" rings true.

"alternacoustic": pete thurston. gregory page. tristan prettyman (whom i wound up seeing four times in a series of lucky breaks). ryan montbleau (seen live twice). tides (andrew's band - seen twice and prepped as my next favorite boston band). finally see damien rice, ben folds, rilo kiley, rufus wainwright in concert. the last dispatch. the rise and fall of gavin degraw (witnessed over the course of three shows during the year), lost with the guitarist. saw again: jason mraz, guster, ani difranco, matt nathanson (2), howie day (3, including the second-dual-day day).

"ah, my people" moments: standing in a theater packed with people who knew every bit of rilo kiley's musical canon, singing along to "a better son/daughter." reading "elliott smith and the big nothing," full of its references to music i actually care about.

casa de racca: june move to the new place with two flatmates. never realized what a selling point color on the walls could be.

happy birthday: surprise! bush's re-election confirmed on my birthday. i postpone birthday celebrations in order to properly mourn; the weekend celebration at the pickel barrel is less-than-spectacular. i cut my losses and think of when i'll turn 25.

and i thought the bridges were burned: my first trip back to dc since moving is an absolute delight. as i walked down the familiar perilous sidewalks of capitol hill, the sense of relief i experience surprised even me. seeing my byline on the wall of front pages at the newseum served as delicious icing on the cake.

"stop the presses": full-time journalism job. got what i wished for.

dirty water: i make many trips; i start to make many plans.

greedy american period-abuser: i start my novel. for real, this time.

*since i couldn't sleep last night, i watched the NESN red sox year in review my uncle gave me for christmas. as i watched footage of the rolling rally, it still didn't feel like i was there, among the 3.2 million crazy people flooding the streets and river shores. huh.

t-minus

status check - distracted
background ambiance - elliott smith (finally bought "from a basement ...")

no matter how quickly "the day before ___" races by, that last two hour block never ceases to drag by.

my day has been a blur of running around, acting professional, showing off savvy and meeting deadlines. the time has passed quickly, aided by the consumption of several cups of coffee (buzzhehehehebuzz). but the moment 8 p.m. hit - BAM!

time
proceded
to
stand
still

despite my best efforts for distraction - gleefully cheering the news that the sox reached an agreement with JV, rereading gaiety information, listening to "from a basement on the hill," searching myspace like it was my job - the past 55 minutes have felt longer than the rest of the day.

just let it be my holiday mini-break weekend already ...

dozy

status check - absurdly sleepy
background ambiance - scanners

it's so warm that i just want to curl up and close my eyes ... just go to sleep ... rest for just a few minutes ...

roasted, toasted

status check - sweltering
background ambiance - scanners

how you feelin - hot hot hot ...

i suppose it's better than the alternative. i could be shivering, bundled beneath layer upon layer of clothing.

instead, i'm sitting at my designated location, which is conveniently positioned directly below an air vent. due to some quirk in the heating system, my little work space has been transformed into a tropical sauna.

think of vegas - in august - without the luxury of a dry heat - while dressed for december in new england.

as i gulp down water and push up my sleeves, i remind myself that i'm much happier with it being too hot than it being too cold. could be worse - we could not have heat at all.

but it would just be more tolerable with a frozen margarita to enjoy - or something likewise blended and served in a frosted glass.

but instead, i sit here, feeling the continuous stream of hot air beat down upon my head. realizing my face has become flushed to the point of matching my bright pink ribbed turtleneck (see? winter = turtlenecks and sweaters, friends). actually looking forward to those first few seconds when i burst out into the cold after the day has come to a close. anticipating those first icy gulps of air and those first clouds of steam when i exhale.

and wondering if i can find some appropriate hot weather music to listen to as i count down those final hours.

because

status check - peachy
background ambiance -

survey follows. but first, since i was asked today, the latest in v's currents:

currently reading: reading two books at one right now. "requiem for a dream" and "elliott smith and the big nothing."

currently listening to: i've been listening to a lot of ryan montbleau lately. "begin" has continued to dominate my car stereo. rilo kiley's "the execution of all things," of course, plus my NEMO compilation - featuring syd, adam ezra group, world/inferno friendship society and the like.

currently looking forward to: a holiday weekend. boston. seeing my family's reactions to the gifts i've selected. spring and/or california in february. whatever concert i find myself at next. getting sleep tonight. etc. etc. etc.

[ one ] grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line 4. write down what it says: "Standard Code for Information Inter-"

[ two ] stretch your left arm out as far as you can. what do you touch first? VYO playbill tacked to the wall

[ three ] what is the last thing you watched on TV? uh ... some infomerical was on last night as i prepared to go to sleep."

[ four ] Without looking at the clock, guess what time it is: 3:31 p.m.

[ five ] now look at the clock. what is the actual time? 3:47 p.m.

[ six ] With the exception of the computer, what can you hear? people talking on the phone. police scanners (2). typing. conversations.

[ seven ] When did you last step outside? what were you doing? about an hour ago. my computer was being worked on, so i went to get a cup of coffee.

[ eight ] Before you came to this website, what did you look at? damn you, myspace.

[ nine ] What are you wearing? black pants. black 3/4 sleeve buttondown with thin pink and blue stripes. black boots. black necklace. trend?

[ ten ] Did you dream last night? nope. the first time in about a week i didn't.

[ eleven ] When did you last laugh? about a half hour ago - watching dennis' averi video.

[ twelve ] What is on the walls of the room you are in? office stuff. some shelves, with phone books, AP stylebooks and newspapers. some printed pictures, previously mentioned playbill. a couple of press tags, concert tickets. phone list. a hand-written reminder that "we are not a mulling people."

[ thirteen ] Seen anything weird lately? i see weird things every day.

[ fourteen ] What was the last film you saw? bend it like beckham. i was frightened by how much of it i can quote.

[ fifteen ] If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first? tickets to cali.

[ sixteen ] Tell me something about you that I don't know: i'll put ketchup on almost anything.

[ seventeen ] if you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do? bye bye bush.

[ eighteen ] Do you like to dance? yep. hey, you didn't ask if i was good at it ...

[ nineteen ] George Bush: can go back to the abyss of hell he sprang from.

[ twenty ] Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her? molly, abigail, perhaps elizabeth so i can call her eliz.

[ twenty-one ] imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him? andrew.

...

status check - contemplative
background ambiance - rilo kiley, "with arms outstretched"

i'm not a big fan of ghost stories - not as much as i was when i was young. back then, i would read "scariest stories you've never heard" volumes 1-265, however many there were. christopher pike young adult novels with the ghost of a teenager for a narrator and the like. i devoured them, loving the idea of ghosts and being scared.

as i grew older, the natural sketpicism grew and i eventually dismissed the idea of lingering spirits and sleeping with the bedroom door open so as to shed light inside my room (i was never scared of the dark, but if something supernatural was in the room with me, i wanted to be able to see it clearly).

every once in awhile, however, you hear about something that makes you stop and ponder. or, perhaps, you have something happen to you where the timing is so on that you have to think, "well, maybe ..."

i had one of those situations occur four years ago today. christmas break of junior year and i was back at the vacation job (mcdonald's, represent). during the evening, i was out in the back area making salads, when i happened to look up front to see if they needed my help. i was amazed to see that lexi, a good friend since early freshman year, was at the front counter.

surprised, my face broke into a grin and i started to head to the counter to say hi. i looked down, then looked up and saw that the woman there looked nothing at all like lexi - must have been my mind playing tricks on me. i went back to my salad-making, briefly thinking about how random it was that i would think lexi would be stopping into the store when she lived nowhere near there.

this occurred shortly after i'd decided to take out my tongue piercing. after a few years of it, i had randomly decided that i didn't want it anymore ... but spent much of the time thinking about the day lexi, becca and lucas went with me to get it. after my shift that night, i went home, took out the barbell and went to sleep - i woke up the next day and the hole had, as i'd hoped, healed overnight.

two completely random things, nothing that would normally have stood out (besides the fact that i no longer had the barbell to play with - which was in and of itself a hard thing to get used to). but, as it turned out, just around the time i thought i saw lexi at the store, she died. right around the time i first decided to get rid of the piercing she had gone with me to get, she was involved with a car accident.

the news didn't reach me until the next day, when my store managers told me that the rest of my shift was covered and i needed to go to my friend's house, which was within walking distance from the store. grumbling at the thought of a missed afternoon of work, i walked up to her front door, rang the doorbell, and saw the red eyes and tears inside.

so it's been four years and lexi continues to be in my thoughts from time to time. i'll remember laughing until i cried as she sprawled on the floor doing the worm. i might listen to some tori amos and remember her exasperated participation in an audio letter i made for a friend back home who thought tori was "lesbian music" - "LESBIAN? tori's MARRIED!" when i'm frustrated, i might recall our last conversation, as i ranted about not having enough time for all the responsibilities i had - "vic, it sucks. i know how it feels. there's no way to make it feel better right now, but i understand and i know it's horrible." and i'll remember how that little bit of honesty - void of any of the sugar-coating and optimism others had tried - worked perfectly.

i miss my friend, but i just smile. because that's what lexi made me do in life. and i smiled when i thought i saw her that day four years ago.

and, for one day - or in one instance, at least - i'll believe in the idea of ghosts or presences and imagine she's smiling back at my grin.

ISO: a little bing crosby to finish things off

status check - exhausted
background ambiance - television

christmas 2004. i've managed to outdo myself without doing myself in. the holiday should be a success.

i'm a habitual last-minute holiday participant. while i annually know precisely what to get for those on my christmas list, the holiday sneaks up on me each year, leaving me breathlessly running from store to store to pick up the items.

i wasn't going to let it happen again this year. as i write this, with nearly a week until the holiday, i have every item (save one being purchased tomorrow) either home (and fabulously wrapped) or en route via mail (with wrapping paper, ribbons and labels ready).

and i'm exhausted as a result.

but the holiday will be grand, i predict. i'm thrilled to see my loved ones' faces when they peel back the layers of paper and tissue to see what i've carefully selected. i think i've done well.

after my parents finally accepted our acceptance of the santa situation, my mother started a habit of labeling gifts with clever hints as to what waits inside. the year i received a dvd of "say anything" (still one of the best movies provided by the 1980s), the label read "from: lloyd." last year's toy-sized vespa (because i'd jokingly said i wanted one) was from rocco (courtesy of "the restaurant").

i always enjoy making similar labels, but i worry if i'm taking the fun out of the game by making it too difficult. it's a fine line, really. you want to give the person a fighting chance to guest it, but you don't want to make it overly obvious.

this makes the label-writing more of a mind-racking experience than one might otherwise think. but i've come up with a collection of gifts with labels of various degrees of difficulty. some they'll get right away, others might make them scratch their heads. others they'll have no chance at. i almost wonder if i should put a number on each label, to distinguish the difficulty level of the label. 1 - easy. 2 - ponder it a bit. 3 - don't even think about it, just open up and laugh after the fact.

nevertheless, i'm looking forward to witnessing the brain teasing and being likewise forced to think early on a saturday morning. the one time i'll allow thought without coffee that early in the morning.

as i wrapped and decorated the gifts yesterday with my flatmates, we decided christmas music was necessary. as my mother owns all the holiday cds i've ever listened to in the past, we turned our cable to the digital music channels (such slaves for technology). we bobbed our heads to bon jovi, sang along to "jingle bell rock" - i even stared at the television for three minutes while the eurythmics performed "winter wonderland."

festive, in a somewhat alarming sort of way.

but i'll save the rest of my holiday music for the christmas eve drive to SoVo and, later that day, massachusetts. christmas is the drive, harmonizing to my mother's radio accompaniment to "rockin' around the christmas tree" and bing crosby's "christmas in killarny."

as for now, four more days of waiting for the holiday goodness.

wow.

status check - shocked
background ambiance - christmas music

well, it was certainly interesting to receive this year's averi christmas card.

thing have really changed, huh?

at least i loved the photo ... yay for stu!

just being

status check - happy
background ambiance - silence, although i've got "beautiful, beautiful" stuck in my head

i like to keep busy. i like to be doing things, going places, seeing sights. it's been well established, through my crazy roadtrips and decisions to "just check it out," whatever it may be.

sometimes, however, a friday evening rolls around and i realize i don't want to do anything. i just want to curl up in jeans and a sweatshirt and do whatever requires the least bit of energy and thought.

such nights can be pretty hit or miss. depends on how the stars align, if you're doing nothing alone or if you have partners in non-existant crime.

tonight, however, has worked out well. i arrived home, with my "aw, screw it, i'm lazy tonight" chinese takeout and spent the evening laughing and going through memories posted online. some my own, most decidely not - which made it all the funnier. beth and i inadvertantly wandered into a web of links and blogs, straying from averi to howie to mraz to ewan to some terrifyingly hilarious music by a band i sincerely hope remains forever hidden in obscurity.

we wound up back here, reading posts from years gone by - years that feel much more distant than the calendar might claim. it was funny to see how 2001 conjures images of sophomore year of college ... all the more so when we were reminded that it was actually senior year.

beth commented on the fact that i used to write much more about my day-to-day activities back then, instead of the broader commentaries (such as they are) that i compose now. a valid observation, i quickly realized. the end of 2001 marked my last comprehensive year in review - it was almost disappointing to see that follow-ups weren't included. i was shocked to realize i did not promptly capture various phone calls in dc - including most the voicemail from burlington in early september 2002 and my disastrous drunk dial the following november (let it be stated: we drunk dialed everyone my age in my phone book, including timme - i still don't know how we got that number - and chad. this also marks the last time i actually spoke with chad on the telephone).

the concerts - those have been consistent. i can follow my growing knowledge of howie day shows, averi shows, john shows, et al. i can once again race back to the horrible feeling of illness that swept over me the first time i tried to see mraz, when i left iota convinced i'd be passed out on the sidewalk before reaching the metro. i made references to wishing i could speak again to people i've subsequently reconnected with - i described connections with people i'm likely never to see or speak to again.

but i haven't done much of it lately. i've been writing about my politics, my online findings, whatever ... but what ever happened to the days of multiple posts during an attempt at an all-nighter? my vows of "never write a paper for so-and-so again," followed by vows to "never write a paper for so-and-so again, take 2"? sure, some elements have changed - definitely no longer the college girl, instead a *cough* professional, but i can maintain some of that spirit and daily insight, right?

maybe it's just that i subconsciously believe that i'll remember more things now that i'm out of the rush of college and early adulthood (as i'm now supposedly in early-mid-adulthood). or perhaps it's simply that i haven't done anything i consider spectacular enough to document for the ages. i don't believe either argument. i know things have already slipped my memory (i just hope something jogs it back into my mind), and i've done some fascinating things since.

and i've just had my random, logic-defying thoughts, both in waking and sleeping worlds.

i had two vivid dreams tuesday night - one involved a flood. it focused predominantly on the return to my flooded car after the waters receded. i remember walking ten miles to get to the car, at which point i stood by it, furious that it wasn't likely to work and that i wouldn't be able to get to any of the places i needed to go. logic at its finest: after walking ten miles, i believed i couldn't get anywhere.

in the other, i was a student - my age, just in school. perhaps grad, but the details weren't too clear. i was at a school lounge, listening to some live music by a singer-songwriter, when i realized i had five minutes to get to class for an exam. i felt no need to leave, however, until the musician suddenly exclaimed, "shit! i have five minutes before an exam!" we were in the same class, and we raced to the classroom, our binders pressed against our chests so the notebook paper wouldn't fly onto the hallway floor. we got into class just as the professor was beginning to hand out the exams, and we took seats in the same row, one student between us. i flipped over the exam booklet and realized i needed to know everything there was to know about thailand - and i knew nothing. the musican and i each looked at each other with dumbfounded expressions, turned back and began to bullshit through each of the exams. i woke up just as i wrote that thailand's year of independence was 1962. (for the record, the following day i looked up thailand in the cia world factbook. thailand independence: 1238 - traditional founding date - never colonized. newest constitution signed by king phumpiphon on 11 october 1997.)

dream analysis gurus of the e-world, lend me your expertise.

i used to mention things like that. i haven't in ages.

can it be that i need to focus on ME more? many would laugh out loud and say that's not possible - touche, i say to you, sirs and madams. but let's face it, i'm a writer. you write what you know, you know what you learn, you learn what you remember. which means i should be able to take from my learnings four years ago as well as those four months ago.

to think, i wind up having a grand philosophical rant and debate with myself - one i should have more often - on a night when i decide to just be for a bit.

note to self: be more often.

huzzah!

status check - elated
background ambiance - typical

from today's boston globe buisness section:

The Massachusetts Land Court heard arguments that it should stop a developer from demolishing the defunct Gaiety Theatre, near Chinatown. The Gaiety's owner, Kensington Investment Co., recently was issued a demolition permit. But a Gaiety neighbor, the Glass Slipper strip club, asserted it would be harmed by the theater's demolition. According to the Glass Slipper, the city zoning code allows the demolition of theaters in the theater district only under special circumstances. But, Kensington's lawyers claimed the Glass Slipper failed to demonstrate that it would be harmed by the demolition. Kensington wants to replace the Gaiety and the Glass Slipper with an apartment building. Judge Keith C. Long said he would issue a ruling next week after Kensington agreed not to take any action until then.

i've never loved a strip club so much in my life.

the gaiety's dying

status check - disheartened
background ambiance - letterman

from my myspace rants today (and there were several):

the gaiety theatre may come down tomorrow.

the phoenix reports that a last minute injunction hearing was scheduled for 10 a.m. today. no information about the decision is yet available, but things didn't look good.

if justice keith c. long of massachusetts land court rules against the injunction, friday would mark the first day kensington place developers could tear down the theater, located on washington street in chinatown. boston's inspectional services department granted kensington a demolition permit on dec. 10.

since learning about the gaiety a few months ago, i have tried to maintain my faith in boston's logic and sense of tradition - all the while preparing myself for news of this nature. i'd walked by the building time and time again during my travels and had no idea that a theater was inside - thanks largely to kensington's successful attempts to let the building fall to ruin.

loathsome kudos would also go to the boston redevelopment authority and boston zoning commission, who have contorted city statues so as to allow the theater to reach this point. the BZC specificially bars anyone from demolishing a theater in the midtown cultural district (unless the building is deemed unsafe). questions over whether the gaiety building is still considered a theater remain unanswered, particularly since the demolition permit describes the legal use as a theater.

i've made a point to return to the gaiety since learning of what was inside - that it could be destroyed has infuriated me for months. the reckless disregard for a theater space is unforgivable - particularly when one learns of the shoddy care and treatment kensington developers have given the building for over 20 years. look at photos of the space - it could be saved and it would be gorgeous. not just another highrise of luxury apartments and a few token "affordable" housing units (and a highrise that does not conform to statutes, no less).

i'd recommend checking out the "friends of the gaiety" web site. a few photos from the exterior are available in boston galleries at my photo site (password DA36).

i'm going to be furious if i go back to boston in a week and a half and there's no gaiety to look upon. but i wonder if it would be worse to have demolition already started when i see it next or just know it's days away?

can't resist

status check - weak
background ambiance - typical

sometimes
you
just
can't
not
do
it
.

damn surveys. and i've been so good about them for so long. nevertheless. stolen. steal accordingly.

THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. victoria
2. vickie
3. vix

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. insects that buzz. mostly hornets/bees/etc, but i've been known to freak out at the sound of a particularly large fly. i'm terrified of being stung.
2. being strangled. i'm better than i used to be, but a couple years ago, people i trusted couldn't even come near my neck with their hands. i'd cringe.
3. not necessarily "scare," but i can be easily startled by people/things jumping out at me unexpectedly. i scream every time.

THREE THINGS THAT MAKE YOU HAPPY:
1. my friends/family
2. music/theater
3. writing

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. lip gloss/balm
2. music
3. my cell phone (i know, i hate me for it, too)

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1. dark jeans
2. burnt orange sweater (burnt as in the color, not the sweater)
3. black boots

THREE THINGS ABOUT THE OPPOSITE OR SAME SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
1. a good laugh/sense of humor.
2. opinions - all the better if some happen to line up with mine, but i like being able to discuss things.
3. musical knowledge and/or ability. this is crucial.

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
1. writing.
2. talking/hanging out.
3. driving.

THREE THINGS YOU WANT REALLY BAD RIGHT NOW:
1. a trip to california ...
2. a city to call my own.
3. a backrub. something fierce.

THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING:
1. a & e reporter/critic
2. published author
3. rockstar (well, no, but still. it would be funny.)

THREE PLACES YOU WOULD GO ON VACATION:
1. california!
2. london!
3. new zealand!

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
1. to put stamps on the passport (scratch that. to HAVE a passport).
2. to have a novel published.
3. to live in boston.

q&a

status check - cold
background ambiance - typical

posted this on the myspace, but figured i'd open it up over here as well. i received a myspace bulletin with this whole "get to know you" thing - much like a survey without all the specific questions. the point of it was that people could ask you three questions about yourself - silly, serious, random, etc. - and you have to answer them completely honestly.

i know i could be setting myself up for disaster, but what the hell, bring it. i invite you to comment here and post three questions. i'll reply on here - and i promise to be completely truthful.

if you don't - hey, works for me - nothing i have to share beyond that i normally would. win-win situation for me. but i'd like it better if you did (this includes both those who "know me" and those i've never had the opportunity to meet).

some stories ...

status check - happy
background ambiance - typical

... don't have a clear beginning, middle and end. life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. delicious ambiguity ...
- gilda radner

i bought a small, square book on saturday that features that quote on the cover. a white book, with 100 white, lined pages, the radner quote printed on front in black typewriter print.

i thought it was perfectly suited to holding my first novel inside.

yes, i know i went on this whole tangent about not blogging anymore, focusing on the myspace posts and whatnot. but i find i mainly write about politics over there, and there's a whole lot more to me than just that ... besides. i love my blogger account. so i'm back again (well, back to doing both, anyway).

things are well. despite the fact that it appears pedro's heading to new york (have fun with that 10-win season with the mets, buddy), despite the snow, despite the cold that continues to pester me, things are going well and i'm pretty content. or, at least, as content as i ever am. it's always just for the time being with me.

the novel is coming along well. i'm a little nervous now that i just wrote that, as i'll get screwed over by some form of e-attack again, but hey. i'll face the potential of disaster. do what you will on the computer, demons - i've got it all backed up on paper! take that, suckas.

winter is making a slow, lethargic arrival, tormenting us with snow bursts and flurries that clear up by the afternoon. we all know it will finally descend upon us, blanketing everything in white for months at a time, but i'm actually enjoying this half-assed attempt at the season. i'd be perfectly happy if it stayed this way through april - keep it at 38, with clear skies and tiny snow showers. i could catch the snowflakes on my tongue and not have to worry about freezing. my idea of a heavenly new england.

during one of saturday's snow squalls, i treked to nectar's to catch an opening set by the adam ezra group - a band i'd apparently heard of years before but never quite remembered. i'll remember now, as the band put on a fun show surprisingly reminiscent of dispatch and virgina coalition. my percussion-happy spirit was satsified with two percussionists - during my favorite moment, adam strapped on a djembe and started jamming with them.

adam had a warm voice that suited the funky happy vibe quite well - and he performed barefoot, which i think is just the coolest thing. he also served as another example of how someone who's a good singer can be a great performer by pairing vocals with an instrument.

give me a musician over a singer anyday - yes, nail those vocals, but do it while playing something. guitar, keyboard, whatever. don't just stand there and grip the microphone.

i'm stumbling toward christmas with a sense of disbelief - it hasn't hit me that it's less than two weeks away. fortunately, i'm ahead of the game this year - just need a few odds and ends and a whole lot of wrapping and ribbon. then i'll be done and ready to bop my way down to massachusetts to revel in holiday goodness with the family types.

IMing with my brother today, he commented on how everyone in our four-member family unit seems happy - wherever they are, whatever they're doing. i thought about it for a moment and laughed. sure, there are things we'd each like to change, but he was right.

my response?

"weird, isn't it?"

temporary hiatus

status check - just groovy
background ambiance - silence

somehow, while attempting to post earlier this evening, the combination of blogger and bloggerbot made my computer start doing all sorts of crazy things and, finally, commit some form of e-self-mutilation. among the casualty of said implosion: all of my recent videos, any of the photos i hadn't already published online and, most agonizingly, a large chunk of the novel i started writing this week.

the videos made me sad, the photos made me angry, the novel made me want to cry. fortunately i have the crux of the words either still fresh in my mind or written down in fragmented pieces in notebooks. it shouldn't screw me over too much - and hey, things were going too easily on that front. back to sweating out the words through the classic use of pen and paper. viva la technology. bah.

i am, however, taking it somewhat as an omen. coupled with the fact that myspace has been luring me away as of late, i'm going to lay off blogspot for a bit. i'm sure i'll post at some point soon (i can't walk away from four years worth of posting here or at madderrain, after all), but most of my rambles will be primarily published over at my profile there (easily accessible here). i'm actually finding that forum more enjoyable right now anyway - you can get a sense of who i am a bit more and it's easier to interact. or, at least, i'm finding that people over there tend to interact more. which is nice to experience - much as this writing is for myself, it's also nice to get feedback on it from time to time.

i'm still figuring out what i'm going to do on the notebook nightlife front - i have a ton of information just waiting to be posted there. i will drop a line here to announce what i do with it.

i've got a number of things coming up - the novel's being penned and i'm determined not to stop until i've got at least a complete work of drivel finished; i may have a new blog venture on the horizon, but with a co-author (operative word: may); i'm writing about myself, politics, pop culture and everything else you've come to expect at revelry over at myspace. i'm actually pleased with some of the things i've been coming up with lately.

so head on over, say hi, drop a line ... and, as always, feel free to drop a line here saying hi or you can send me email. i'd love to be able to chat.

talk to you soon - be good. xoxoxo.