If I'm gonna go down I'm gonna do it with style. You won't hear me surrender, you won't hear me confess cause you've left me with nothing but I have worked with less. - Ani DiFranco

We're taught to open ourselves up to other people. Part of learning and growing is to share yourself with other people, to let them see the good (and the bad, ugly, timid, frightened, zany and adorable) that composes who you are.

I know that there is inherent good to such action, and I'm realizing it again today, if not for a decidedly different reason.

Opening yourself up shows you who you can trust and who you can't. You learn who is worth it and who isn't.

It's one of the most painful lessons to learn. And I can feel the shell around me harden as I experience this rapid-fire education.

Simply put, the people I know are hurting me. They are disappointing me. They are making me realize that I don't register as nearly as important to them as they have to me. And while they can tell me they love me and adore me until they are blue in the face, I've grown tired of nodding my head at empty words. I'm not seeing any form of demonstrative action and
I
am
angry.

But at least I'm learning. I won't repeat these mistakes.