Ever the embodiment of grace and poise, I've already managed in two hours to outdo my usual self. Hiding away within a roll of bubblewrap today might not be that bad an idea.

8:30 a.m. - After accidentally (read: half-consciously) ignoring two alarms, wake up. Realize one doesn't feel particularly well, attribute this to Monday-itis. Roll over, reach for contact lens case.
8:32 a.m. - Finally find contact lens case after it falls under the bed. Open case. Drop contact. Growl menacingly at contact lens. Contact lens does not respond.
8:33 a.m. - Reach for towel. Drop towel. Pick up towel, reach for other towel. Drop other towel.
8:34 a.m. - Walk toward bedroom door. Run into dresser.
8:56 a.m. - Realize one has nothing (read: a whole lot but nothing that seems quite right today) to wear.
9:01 a.m. - Drop hairbrush.
9:05 a.m. - Realize boots one wants to wear have fallen into Bermuda Triangle.
9:10 a.m. - Realize boots are precisely where one left them - and where one already looked twice.
9:12 a.m. - Misplace phone.
9:13 a.m. - Find phone.
9:20 a.m. - Prepare to turn off bedroom lights, realize one hasn't packed one's phone.
9:21 a.m. - Realize one doesn't know where phone is. Again. Briefly consider Calling In Destructive. Decide instead to take one's chances.
9:23 a.m. - Find phone. Explain morning to laughing roommate and wonder what calamities await oneself if one decides to run on treadmill later in day.