go averi!

i was just told that i look just like donna on "the west wing."

see? the new season hasn't even started yet and i'm getting signs!

if you know me, if you even REMOTELY know me, you know that i don't need to say another word about this. just laugh and "revel...revelrevel" with me.

son of a monkey's uncle--i just wrote an entry and it didn't go through.

alright, so i need some commenting love, people. and here's a little incentive:

columbus day weekend. lovin vermont style when i return to the green mountain state for a little visit. i fly out of baltimore friday night, so i'll be around saturday, sunday and early monday. a possible trip to burlington on sunday for some muddy waters, church street and waterfront action. who's game?

so i got one of these emails awhile ago from someonelikesyou.com. didn't do anything with it because you have to type in the addresses of other people and i'm not going to submit myself to passing along the chain of "ooh, someone likes you!" when i'm primarily trying to guess who sent it to me, not necessarily that i'm interested in someone else (nor would i use someonelikesyou.com as a way of confessing a crush), because that's probably how i got this, anyway--someone thought i was being a wiseass and sending something in, etc. etc. etc.

but if you know anyone between the ages of 19 and 23 who has four vowels in their first name and does happen to have a crush on me, please encourage them to contact me via some other form, because i will not be participating in this one. ;)

i had a discussion with paul near the end of last semester, discussing the transition from student to professional, where he told me that it's actually less work to be a professional than a student. you leave your work at the office, you don't have a million different responsibilities and different obligations, etc.

i acknowledge that this is true in many respects. i do get to leave my work at the office, i do get to have a few hours each night to do whatever it is that i want to do.

but i'll say this: this whole 9-5 (or in my case, 9-6) thing is kicking my ass! i'm amazed by how tiring it is and how i feel as if there really aren't enough hours in the day for everything i might like to do. let's take my 9-6 day (twice a week it's actually 8-5): i wake up around 6, get ready, eat some breakfast and walk out the door by 8, take the metro into the city and walk a couple of blocks to work. work until 6 with my hour lunch break, then walk back to the metro station and head home. a run follows (whether around my neighborhood or in the fitness room in my apartment building's sister buidling), then dinner followed by relaxation. i've been here for two and a half weeks and they've gone by pretty quickly because you get into the grind and just go go go...by the end of the week, i'm worn out! i know it's just a process of getting into the routine, but it's hard when you're first starting such a different schedule. after all, i've always been a night owl and have never needed a signficiant amount of sleep (although i've always enjoyed oversleeping from time to time), and now 11 rolls around and i'm getting ready to head to bed.

!?!??!?

but it's another monday, a new week. the weekend was pretty decent: got out of work around 4:30 and headed down to red river grill for a drink with a bunch of coworkers. then five of us headed somewhere in adams morgan, where we stayed for awhile before moving to the front page. met up with carrie and kelly (carrie's friend from undergrad) and tried to meet up with a group of carrie's friends at a place in dupont, but that kind of fell through, so we then went to the lucky bar, where we stayed for about five minutes before going to the citron cafe (a latin club slightly on the swanky side). i never barhopped before coming here, and it's an interesting experience. i know that, right now, i'd love the opportunity to just be able to sit down with some good friends and share some laughs over drinks or meet someone interesting. let's face it, i've always preferred taking it a little easy to being the wild and crazy type...but i know that doing all this now will (hopefully) pay off and i'll be able to have those chats down the road somewhere...

i decided to spend my saturday recharging the batteries and stayed in and relaxed by myself and had a nice evening of it. i had picked up a dvd at blockbuster when grocery shopping, so that night i curled up in my room and watched "the cat's meow", which i had wanted to see when it was in theaters, but couldn't find a place around home where it played. i recommend it--pretty decent film.

it was nice to relax and not run out and do anything--i have to keep in mind that there's no way i should feel as if i have to do something every weekend night. if i do, not only will i be exhausted, i will also have no money and will depress myself because i will feel compelled to be Out and With People and feel like there is something wrong if i'm not out. so i'm a fan of, unless there's something wildly exciting or somone asks me to hang out with them, spending one weekend night out and spending one weekend night relaxing and doing whatever.

i think it works out well...or at least i hope it does!

this morning is stressful...not a good start to the week!!!

SCORPIO:
Monday, September 16

You may not yet be entirely sure of the best approach to a domestic, real estate or family matter, or to a long-range goal. This is why they say patience is a virtue and good things come to those who wait. And this is why your horoscope says sit tight!

man killed by metro train

yeah, he jumped.

and the some of the cookies i brought into work today for the group birthday party were crushed in the commute. *pout*

is anyone else intrigued by what they're hearing about the movie "igby goes down"? i really want to see this movie when it comes out.

friday the thirteenth has always been a lucky day for me, but it started out with a less-than-stellar hour-and-a-half commute to work because someone either fell into or jumpted into the path of an oncoming subway train at union station.

NEAH!

but in better news, i'm in the middle of a little game of phone tag, which makes me happy...

if there was one thing i didn't expect to hear last night, it was "this little light of mine."

the boss let us out an hour early last night, thanking us for a job well done, so i hurried home, attempted to go for my run (although my body really wasn't feeling it at the time, so it was just an abbreviated version of my normal route), took a shower and headed back to the capitol for the candlelight vigil that had been announced at the reflecting pool. my candlelight vigil experience last year was so memorable that i wanted to be able to experience another one--albeit one that i knew would not be comparable to the previous year. more like apples and oranges.

it was a beautiful night, as the skies were clear and washington is gracefully easing from summer into autumn. i walked from union station to the west side of the capitol building, talking with a guy who was heading to the vigil as well. when i arrived at the reflecting pool, those gathered had formed a ring around the pool and had begun to light their candles. the sun was setting, so the washington monumen and lincoln memorial were illuminated by lights, white against the lilac, pink and orange sky, the candles glimmering in front (i brought my camera, so hopefully my shots will come out). there was a large group and i settled down on the steps in front of a statue so i could observe the crowd.

it started off formally enough: two military bugalists led the crowd in "america the beautiful", then walked away from each other and gave a chillingly beautiful rendition of "taps" before walking away. at that point, the vigil took a freeform turn. people started singing "god bless america," "amazing grace," the national anthem, and whatnot. because of the size of the group and the distance from one side of the pool to the other, an unintentional round of each song was the result--but it was a nice touch. it was difficult to keep the candles lit because of the breeze, but people tried and many were able to. if a candle went out, nearby flames were offered to relight it. news cameras roamed the group, capturing the expected images of hands holding candles and faces illuminated by the light. i stayed at my perch for about twenty minutes before moving about myself. i moved to a group standing in front of a backdrop of the stark white capitol against the night sky and took some pictures of the impressive sight. then i tried to relight my candle with a lighter. i was having difficulty and a cameraman was watching me try, so he lit the candle for me while i cupped my hand around it to protect the flame.

"i want this shot," he said with a smile. strange to go from covering the news to being covered--i prefer covering it, thank you very much.

and as i was leaving, someone started singing "this little light of mine." so i stopped and sang along before i headed home.

i was interested in seeing how this vigil would compare to "our" vigil, and i found it comforting in an entirely new way. at the st. michael's vigil, i knew everyone--or at least, knew of everyone--and was surrounded by close friends, sharing out shock and grief. being able to raise money for the red cross was an amazing process and increidbly uplifting. at this service, i didn't know anyone, but we had all come together to share what we did have in common--a need to remember. while there were many more people at this one, the sense of comradery was still there, but more of a dogged comradery--naturally it was not as raw as last year.

i'm certainly glad i was there. it was a surreal end to a surreal day.

it doesn't feel like it's been a year since i wrote this. yet at the same time, it feels like it happened eons ago. while any anniversary is accompanied by that paradox, today is an extreme example of it.

i know we'll all be innundated by images and thoughts and commentaries today, but it's time for my mini-commentary (it's my blog, so just deal with it). looking back now, i don't believe i ever discussed here where i was or what i was doing and whatnot. baz called at 10:20 and woke me up, telling me that something had happened at the world trade center. still half-asleep, i didn't get it. "hun, that happened back in the 90s. bomb...it was a tragedy, but it was awhile ago."

"no, a plane hit the trade center. turn on your tv."

"fine, i'll call you back."

i went downstairs in what i thought was my empty townhouse and turned on the tv to nbc, absolutely amazed/horrified/shocked by what i was seeing. katie and matt were trying to figure out what had happened, i was trying to follow them figuring it out. i went outside and spoke with soo, and when i came back inside, the second tower had collapsed (the first had already fallen). i spent the rest of the day glued to the television, just like everyone else in the country, leaving to attend a service in the chapel.

i didn't cry much or anything--i didn't know anyone who would have been in danger. the only time i remember crying was when i thought they would resume the draft, because i was worried that my brother would be drafted and something would happen to him. but i don't even believe that was on the first day--i think it was the day after. the lack of planes flying overhead was a jolt--i had grown so accustomed to the background sound of the jet engines that i hadn't noticed them until they were silenced and an eerie quiet filled the air.

and here we are, a year later. back then, i was just beginning my senior year of college. i didn't know where i would be in a year or what i would be doing--figuring out how to handle the first issue of the defender was enough of a pressing issue for me. i was surrounded by a community of friends at st. michael's, sharing the unbelievable experience with all of them and communicating with my family at home.

i didn't realize until today how today is not only the anniversary of a horrific moment in our lives, but a marker from which we can see how each of us have changed in the past year. i feel so much older now. i went from a college student in vermont to someone who is working for the very government we turned to on that day. i watched the television and saw news reports from washington--and on this september 11, i'm in washington. surreal...

i'm carrying on business as normal in the office, presently watching the pentagon memorial service on c-span. walking out of union station this morning, i took a small american flag from one of the numerous people passing them out, so the flag is currently displayed on my desk. all of the flags that are in front of the fountain in front of the station were at half mast while many people were wearing red white and blue. i personally struggled with what to wear today--much as it sounds utterly shallow--and fought my initial impulse to wear black, deciding instead to wear something lighter and cheerier in color, but still professional and tasteful enough to be respectful, considering what so many were observing. i wasn't the only one who struggled with this--i've spoken to several people who went through the same thing (which was a relief, as i felt incredibly superficial while having this internal debate).

there's a candlelight vigil at the capitol reflecting pool this evening that i plan to attend, then i'll come home, possibly run (depending on the time) and reflect, then watch the rebroadcast of "9/11" on cbs (i was only able to see bits and pieces of it the first time it aired because i had defender responsibilities to take care of). other than that, i think it's important to think and reflect on things, but also carry on as normally as possible--otherwise, we're still being attacked, in a sense.

but i hope everyone out there is safe and remembering the day in their own special ways...my parents were a little worried about me being here today, but i can say with confidence that i'm in one of the safest places in the country right now and nothing will happen today, so fear not. just take care.

the timing could not have been better.

yesterday was difficult. i hadn't slept much the night before, i was frustrated by my apparent lack of common sense--one of those inevitable days where things just don't quite work out the way they should. add to that the fact that i've had a little time to be in this new environment and try to start settling in, only to realize that there's no way i can really settle in quite yet: i still don't have things of my own in my room (as they won't be here for another couple of weeks), i don't have a comfort level at my job yet, i'm still placing faces with names and don't have anyone here that i feel completely comfortable yet (how can i? i've only been here a week and a half and have been busy running all over the place). so some homesickness and, yes, some self-pitying crept into my spirits over the course of the day. i made a couple of phone calls on my way from work to union station so i could feel connected to people i care about and planned on calling home after i went running so i could just talk to my parents and cry for a bit. nothing particularly shocking, you see, just something that was due.

so i get home and go running right away (it was gorgeous--it's slowly starting to feel a little cooler in the evenings and i was witness to a technicolor sunset, one that cast rose and amber tones onto the limestone and granite buildings in my neighborhood--lovely), running the farthest since i've been here and feeling better about it--maybe i'll touch base with my inner runner again after all--and actually ran into chloe, who was also out for a run, in my travels. i'd been planning on picking up the mail when i got in, but she beat me to it. when i returned to the apartment, i had three deliveries waiting for me on my desk.

thank you thank you thank you. becca sent me her own special form of care package ("dude, you've got a package! details inside..."), while beth sent an incredibly sweet card that made me feel as if the card makers had the two of us in mind when creating it--so appropriate it's almost frightening! meanwhile, i had a note from the fuck yeah tour waiting for me, as well as some of the munchies to stock up my supplies in the kitchen. to have love and votes of confidence from back home arrive on just the day that i needed them most--it could not have been a better series of surprises. thank you!

i was riding into work yesterday when an attractive guy, probably mid- to later-twenties sat next to me. as i sat there, i instinctively glanced at his left hand. no ring, i thought to myself with a smile. then i realized that, without thinking, i had checked to see if someone i found attractive was married. and i felt incredibly, shockingly old.

random moments.

oh! before i forget: veterans' day weekend. d.c. jack johnson at 9:30 club, 203 reunion--i'm all about it (aboot it), so let's plan for it! very, very excited me.

you're having a rough day, it feels like you've got a cloud over your head, and then, all of a sudden, there's this bright ray of perfect-wave-surfing-palm-tree sunshine that breaks up the gray.

fun times this weekend.

friday night's happy hour turned into friday night's debauchery. went to buffalo billiards with a bunch of people from work for the "welcome to the group vickie and dan" happy hour. it was nice to be able to see how people from the office interact outside of the office...then erica, her roommate carrie and i went to lucky's bar for an event held by carrie's law school (or something along those lines). after a little bit of time there, we moved on to dan's cafe in adams morgan to meet up wtih the office group again. dan's cafe is home to the flask and bucket special. for twelve dollars, one gets a glass of the alcohol of one's choice, a chaser, two glasses and a small bucket of ice. while i did not partake in said special (yet--after such a long, emotionally draining week, i had a few drinks at happy hour and realized i would be on my way to a bad drunken stupor instead of a good one, so i made sure to remain only buzzed), i did witness it and know that i will partake at some point in the future. then we all headed to patrick's for a party there, where fun times were had. while heading back to respective apartments, e & c & i experienced the "big slice" at pizza mart--for three dollars, you get a slice of pizza that must be three times larger than any other slice of pizza i have ever seen. we're talking mammoth, gigantic, colossal proportions here. and when you're buzzing, it is tastier than any pizza i've had in a good long while (although i will say that i don't know if it quite hit the spot like manhattan's pizza in burlington after a knock-you-on-your-ass long island iced tea).

walking around the streets of adams morgan was amazing--the area was pulsing with life. people pouring out of bars, clubs, restaurants onto the sidewalks, blowing away the steam from the pizza slices that precariously balanced on thin paper plates and squares of aluminum foil. cars attempting to dodge the people who moved out into the street, honking horns that blended in with the bass pumping from the bars--it was an amazing explosion for each of my senses. if i ever get to the point where i take something like that for granted, i need to leave immediately.

i woke up pretty early on saturday and went for a run, then relaxed for awhile before heading out to find dccd, a music store i had read about online. this place rules--the underground, badass, shades of "high fidelity" place i've been searching for. it's a bit of a hike to get to from the metro (i thought it was closer to dupont, but it's actually in adams morgan), but so worth it. good prices, good selections. different bands i'd heard of but could never find much information about--wilco, spoon, finch, etc.--and they've got it there. and there are stations set up where you can sit down, relax and listen to one of five cds they have at that particular station, so i listened to "rush of blood to the head"--coldplay takes the next step, fucking brilliant--and the latest wilco--i've got to get it at some point soon. howie's album was available to listen to at one of the stations--i couldn't help but laugh.

wound up going to eastern market shortly thereafter to experience everything available there on the weekends--fell in love with that as well. there's a market area that sells produce, meat, breads, flowers--you name it--inside during the week, but during the weekends, vendors open up shops all around the outside of the market. you'd think it's your typical farmer's market type deal, but there's something about the atmosphere that gives it a special feel. i got such a kick out of being able to look through the vegetables and fruits...moving on to the craft stalls across the street to see what special little trinkets are available...

relaxed at home saturday night for most of the time...chloe, nicole and i went to bethesda and hit up ben & jerry's (aw...vermont!), but it was nice to just relax and watch television and not have to do anything.

and then there was sunday. around 1 maybe, i get voicemail from the fuck yeah tour (meg, christine, the guy, jesus kleist) with the announcement that they're on their way to d.c. yeah yeah! they arrived at casa victoria, relaxed for a bit, then we headed out to do the sightseeing thing (the mall and surrounding monuments). got back to my metro and raced to chipotle, praying it was still open (score--it's open til 10, even on sundays) and i introduced them to my new favorite mexican-type food. after searching for a grocery store that was still open, christine and i left everyone else at the apartment, hopped on bikes and rode farther up the street, searching for the market the guy from clyde's said would be our best bet to buy beer. after passing two closed liquor stores and riding uphill (hello, watery legs), we wound up at a 24-hour cvs and learned that there was nowhere in the area that would sell this late on sunday. but at least it was an adventure...spent the rest of the night playing some card games with the beer the tour still had in mary jane (and a little rum for me) and all fell asleep in my room watching "the family guy" (i got a special episode played for me: the episode where he becomes a lobbyist for the tobacco industry on capitol hill).

i will admit that i had a brief relapse of sorts (put two and two together and you'll know what i'm talking about), but it was only for the night and i am right back on track. not overly thrilled with myself in that respect, but what are you going to do?

you can tell when i'm missing the internet, when i have to blog about my entire weekend--but it was a very good time and it was wonderful to have some st. michael's life in the area--i had a great time but also realized how much i miss everyone. hearing about who the gang ran into during their road trip and how everyone's doing--it was comforting, but also made me realize that people are starting their new lives in different places--and i want to be able to at least know how they are all doing.

so yeah, that's where i'm at right now. another day, another week, another set of adventures just around the bend. i'm hoping the gang stops by the office around my lunch break so i can see them before they head off, but regardless, it was great to be able to have my first houseguests and show someone a bit of my area of the city (as much of it as i happen to know, that is). it was just great to have some friends around that i'm not still in the process of getting to know. a comfort that came at a great time.

revel...revelrevel.

can't you see that i want to be there with open arms?
it's empty tonight, and i'm all alone
get me through this one

do you notice i'm gone?
"where do you run to, so far away?"

i want you to know that i miss you
i miss you so
i want you to know that i miss you
i miss you so

i'm writing again
these letters to you, aren't much i know
but I'm not sleeping, and you're not here
the thought stops my heart

do you notice i'm gone?
"where do you run to, so far away?"

i want you to know that i miss you
i miss you so
- finch, letters to you

i like that song. and i like the prospects of this evening: happy hour at buffalo billiards followed by other forms of drunken debauchery, it seems...bwahahaha...

i'm checking out eastern market this weekend, exploring, hopefully making a trip to the kennedy center and trying to find independent music stores...revelrevel...

SCORPIO:
Friday, September 6

You know how you said you wanted new contacts, new excitement, new affiliations and new intrigue? Well, thanks to the New Moon, you are about to receive these in spades. Better yet, some of these chills, thrills, excitement and activities will really appeal, and may turn out to be lasting and profitable.

groovy.

Man with 16 guns arrested in D.C.

whoo hoo!!!!!!! now if it had been 20, i might have been concerned.

i am driving up 85 in the
kind of morning that lasts all afternoon
just stuck inside the gloom
four more exits to my apartment but
i am tempted to keep the car in drive
and leave it all behind

cause i wonder sometimes
about the outcome
of a still verdictless life

am i living it right?
am i living it right?
am i living it right?
why georgia, why?

i rent a room and i fill the spaces with
wooden places to make it feel like home
but all i feel is alone
it might be a quarter life crisis
or just the stirring in my soul

either way i wonder sometimes
about the outcome
of a still verdictless life

am i living it right?
am i living it right?
am i living it right?
why georgia, why?

so what, so i've got a smile on
but it's hiding the quiet superstitions in my head
don't believe me
when i say i've got it down

everybody is just a stranger but
that's the danger in going my own way
i guess it's the price i have to pay
still "everything happens for a reason"
is no reason not to ask myself

if i am living it right
am i living it right?
am i living it right?
why georgia, why?

it amazes me how much a song i've listened to regularly for almost two years now is just not resonating with me on such a completely different level. i listen to it every day.

greetings from d.c...no, i have not fallen off the face of the planet or been mugged or gotten lost on the metro. i am, for the time being, simply without internet access at home (the horror of horrors for me, one would think, but i'm handling it remarkably well, i'd like to think). today is my first day at work and i'm getting used to things and figuring out what the routine is--and growing accustomed to my "professional" wardrobe (i'll admit it, i still almost do a doubletake when i catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror or a reflection). a few thoughts about the past days:

- roommates are cool, room is cool, apartment is cool.
- the cheesecake factory: the second coming of carbur's. the menu has ADVERTISEMENTS IN IT.
- like the legions of other d.c.-area types, i'm running every other day. stop laughing.
- i have everything i could possibly need as far as resources within a walking distance of my place. this is very odd to me, but i like it. a lot.
- dupont circle: fuuuun on a saturday night.

i'm enjoying myself well enough, but it's hard to be away from everyone. my cell phone doesn't work in my apartment (not yet, anyway, and not to mention that i can't find my phone charger--grrrr) and, after i do something or see something or come home, i expect my family to be around or my friends to be a short distance away. it takes a moment for me to realize that they're not--and it's very bittersweet. i've always thought that life is supposed to completely consume you--there's always supposed to be something going on, some adventure or, at least, some burden to deal with. i'm already realizing that this isn't always the case--there's downtime and times where you don't have things pressing on you.

now me? i like keeping busy (i know, surprise surprise) and knowing that i have things to do because that way i'm constantly stimulated. and involved with people and interacting. so i think that i'm going to be looking for things to do in the coming weeks--maybe a weekend job that's fun or volunteer work--i don't know, just something. but then again, i don't know exactly what's coming up for me--meeting new people and whatnot--so i can't do that right away.

yet i feel like there's this big ol' city in front of me, filled with all of these people, and i'm wondering how on earth i'm going to track down some of those people to call my own. it's not as if it's like college, when we were all together in this little community and we couldn't NOT get to know each other because we were falling all over each other. here i feel as if i'm supposed to do something to find people...but i'm not sure of exactly what. so, for right now, i'm going to just keep what i'm doing and hope that i'm doing it right. what else can i really do? after all, i've only been here a few days...

so yeah...d.c. is a bit intimidating, a bit frightening, but exhilerating as well. this morning i packed my lunch, grabbed my carryall bag and bought a copy of the post to read while i rode into the city on the metro. it was my first experience as a full-fledged commuter. definitely a change of pace and made me realize (as if i hadn't already, but you know what i mean) that i'm officially a city-dweller. how crazy is this?!?

i'm taking a break from the packing process (well, i'm just about finished with packing, it's more of the loading up the car process, but i digress) to quickly fill you in on the latest example of bostonian debauchery--as well as my preparations for leaving (which occurs in a few hours--yeah, i doubt i'm sleeping tonight too).

but before d.c., boston: once again, averi kicked some concert arse with their performance at the house of blues. i actually love the venue--kind of rustic/laidback/intimate/casual--michelle called it "almost divey, but not really," which i think fits it really well. the basement and main floors of the building serve as dining space while the second and third floors are performance space (second floor has the stage, third is dressing room area). the band packed in a good crowd and delivered a fantastic performance. they played every track off of "direction of motion" (if not all ten, then nine of the ten), as well as two new songs (i love "she waits"), the "with or without you" cover, "garden of eden" and "despondent" and chad performed a solo acoustic song. the band was obviously having a blast--just watching the look of joy wash over their faces as the crowd sang along and cheered was wonderful.

it was a great night--definitely worth the trip. it was great to see the band perform once more before i leave (while i hope i can see them again soon, who knows, right?), it was good to be able to talk to chad a little bit and it was wonderful to be able to have one last boston adventure with my concert-going partner in crime michelle. from wandering harvard square (i want to go back sometime, i was intrigued by the area) to hoping against hope that we didn't miss the last t and all the laughs along the way, i had a great, great time.

after waking up far too early and making the trip back to vermont, today has been rough--putting it mildly. it's a lot easier to think about moving when there's more than 24 hours before said move. besides feeling like i don't have everything done and the apprehension of "what if they all hate me?", there's the horrible process of saying goodbyes. not that seeing people is horrible, obviously, but i suck at goodbyes. comes with the overdramatic sap character trait. needless to say, i've been crying all day. but it's not entirely my fault! everyone's been incredibly sweet. said goodbye to michelle this morning, was listening to the radio and i heard "ghost" for the first time (on the radio, that is). the whole "wow, everything's changing so quickly" thought popped into my head and boom--i cried. mike had asked me to stop into work, so when i did, becky gave me a scrapbook she had made for me. it was covered with winnie-the-pooh (a.a. milne style, not disney--score) fabric and has a gorgeous maya angelou quote on it and has colored pencils, a glue stick--the works--inside. everyone signed it and wished me well--i cried. met up with becca and baz to hang out for a bit and say so long for now--cried in the car. got to bethy's, talked and watched a bit of the vma's before saying goodbye--cried at her house and in the car. got a couple of emails that meant a lot to me--cried.

i am such a sap.

but hey, it's an adventure, and i think i'm ready for this. despite my apparent failure to stop the waterworks, i'm excited about what tomorrow brings. this is going to be a fun year--nothing i've ever experienced, that's for sure! so here goes...

i don't know what exactly the status is for internet at my apartment--we either have AOL now or will be getting it shortly, but the short and long is that i don't know when i'll update here next--as soon as i can, i will say that. until then, cell phone calls will have to suffice...a day without blogging? this feels so wrong...anyway, until next time...wish me luck.

and the colors are much brighter now
it's like they really want to tell the truth
we give our testimony to the end of the summer
it's the end of the summer,
you can spin the light to gold.
- dar williams (thanks beth)

alright. i've got clothing. i've got shoes. i've got glasses (!!!!!!!!!!!) and contacts. i've got everything i need (i think) to look the part of a capitol hill staffer. and look pretty good, i think! i've also got a new license and a haircut. the fam is going out to dinner tonight (last time we'll all be together for a meal for awhile), then mom and i are packing and watching "broadcast news" tonight. tomorrow--boston baby boston! phone calls will be made to see who's coming, who's not (and will be missed, but it's understandable) and what the timeframe will be. i'm looking to be home early thursday afternoon--bethy and becca, i want to visit!

by the way, i can't help it...howie appears to have bounced back from the ym photo shoot debacle (sorry, but he looked horrible) to looking pretty damn good for the ghost video shoot (for example, here and here, off the official site), if i do say so myself...i know i get teased for it, but there's something about him...